Slow and Steady
by LilyoftheValley77
Summary: It's been five years since Edward left Bella in the forest. She has almost recovered fully from that night, but when someone re-enters her life unexpectedly, will memories come flooding back causing pain or help her move on once and for all?
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: Takes place after Edward leaves Bella. Bella never jumped off the cliff, but never got together with Jacob either. It's been almost five years since Edward left, Bella has graduated college and is about to move out on her own. She is spending one last summer with Charlie in the house in Forks.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of Twilight. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Damn, now I'm depressed.

Bella's POV:

It still hurts me to be in this room, even after all this time. I close my eyes and I can picture my Edward sitting there on the bed, holding me, kissing me, telling me that he will love me forever. It still hurts me, but the pain is now more of a dull ache, has been for a long time. Sometimes I think, no, I know, that ache will be with me forever.

I looked around at the boxes in the room, realizing that there was still more packing to do. It was the end of my last summer with Charlie. I graduated from the University of Washington with a major in English Literature two months ago. I was a fully fledged adult now, ready to move off and live on my own. I smiled, remembering how proud Charlie was of me that day. I know that he secretly bragged about his daughter who graduated Summa Cum Laude to anyone that would listen, even though he would never admit it to me. We still had our quiet, stoic relationship. It was the one consistent relationship I had in my life since I moved to this small town junior year. I would miss him terribly.

I got a wonderful job offer in Boston at a publishing house. Pay was not that great, but it was a great entry level job plus an opportunity to see New England. It also had the added benefit of getting me away from the Pacific Northwest. I realized how ready I was to move on with my life. While the ache would always be there, it's been a long time since it ran my life, dictated who I was. I am not the same Bella Swan of five years ago. I look back on her, not really sure if I even recognize that girl anymore.

For one, I am more jaded now. Love lost will do that to a person. I now know better and look before I leap. I am also not as naïve as I once was or as easily controlled. I think about all the times that I let Edward lead me around or tell me what to do, and I get angry. Not really at him, but more so at myself. I was not confident, and Edward truly had me believing that I was a fragile, breakable creature. It took me years to come to the realization that I am neither of those things. I survived his departure for the past five years and that makes me stronger than either he or myself gave me credit for.

I now have friends from college; I have even found romance, though they never lasted longer than a couple of months at a time. The boys were still too immature and still finding themselves. I did not find myself being challenged intellectually with them, and they were too eager to please. I guess that is how Edward viewed the me of five years ago. I was so eager to make him happy. Even when he was controlling, even when he was on the verge of being obsessive, I pushed aside rationale. Instead of acknowledging what I knew, that the combination of the two did not make for a healthy relationship, I simply ignored it, deciding that our love triumphed all and that was what love truly was and should be. How naïve I was.

Charlie's yelling from the downstairs pulled me out of my thoughts. "Bella! Dinner is ready!"

The beginnings of a smile began to trace my face, still amazed that while I was away at college Charlie learned how to cook for himself. "I'll be right there!"

I looked around the room again. In three days, I would be gone. In three days Bella Swan would leave Forks, Washington hopefully to never return again.

I spent the next three days saying goodbyes to everyone I knew. Mike Newton was back in town, he was moving soon to Southern California. Angela was still in Forks. She was now engaged to Ben. They were set for a wedding in the spring. Saying goodbye to them was sad, but not that difficult, as we had naturally drifted apart from four years in separate colleges. With a promise to keep touch, Angela and Mile each went back to their own lives.

The next person I had to say goodbye to was much more difficult. Jacob Black had been my rock, my sun for the past five years. He was the person to bring me back from the point of oblivion. I was the person who knew all his secrets, and he was the person who knew mine. We were each other's family. At one point, I had thought that Jacob and I would possibly get together. It was the summer after graduation. I had decided that Edward was never coming back and I did need to move on. Who else but Jacob could possibly come close to comparing to Edward? Who else would love me so completely, so honestly, and with all their heart? I knew that Jacob wanted more than friendship, needed more than friendship.

I remembered the day that Jacob and I finally kissed. It was on the beach at sunset. It was finally a sunny day at La Push and the weather was warm and inviting. The daylight was fading fast and my head was resting comfortably on Jacobs shoulder as it had so many times before. I knew at that point I could be content and happy with him. Maybe not with a love as all consuming as Edward's, but still filling and whole. With that thought, I had mustered up the courage to look Jacob in the eyes and leaned in to kiss him. The kiss was a gentle kiss, but it was filled with as much love as I could give at the time. Jacob pulled away a few moments after the kiss had started.

"Wow. Bella. You… so you finally decided that you want to be with me?" Surprised had lined his handsome face and a trace of something else that I could not put my finger on at that moment.

I had smiled. It was a nice kiss, and something I would not have minded repeating again. "I know it took a while for me to come around, Jacob. I really appreciate all the time you gave me to come to my own decision…"

Jacob placed his index finger on my lips at that point to shush me. It was then I realized what the other look had been, sadness mixed with anguish. "Bella, I have imprinted. It was just a couple of days ago. I was going to tell you tonight…" Jacob had continued rambling on at that point, but I had stopped listening.

And that had been that. With those words, the future that I had planned for myself and Jacob was no more. I knew what it meant to imprint and knew that there was no going around that. It was at that time that I had decided that I needed to attend college and begin to pull myself away from the life I had in Forks.

Even though our life was not one of romance, Jacob and I had still remained close friends. I truly did like Jacob's mate, Audrey, and seeing them together was like two pieces of a puzzle put together. It just seemed right.

Jacob had cried when I said my goodbye. I reminded him that I was just a phone call away and that he could visit anytime he wanted to in Boston. I knew that this was harder on him then it probably was even on Charlie.

After I had said my goodbyes to everyone, there was just one last thing I needed to do. As I pulled up to the end of the long winding driveway, I hesitated a moment before pulling in with my truck. I needed this. Even though the house would be empty, I needed to say goodbye once and for all to Edward Cullen.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: Chapter Two. Read, review, enjoy. First time writing a fan fiction in a long long time, so getting my feet wet so to speak with this one. Hope everyone likes.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of Twilight. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Damn, now I'm depressed.

As I pulled slowly up the driveway, memories flooded my mind. They always did whenever I attempted this. Usually, I would turn around one I saw the house, my emotions overcoming me. But this time, this time would be different. For one, it has been three years since I last attempted to come here, and I knew I was much stronger now. Secondly, this time was not me visiting to try to remember Edward, I was visiting to walk through my past once more, and then leave it all forever behind me.

I began to turn the corner and the large white house that used to be occupied by the family that meant so much to me loomed before me. Nothing had really changed in five years, there was definitely overgrowth, but someone had been there once or twice to maintain the home on an annual basis. I found myself noting that the usual heartache returned. But to my relief, while the heartache was there, it was not overwhelming. It was there in the background but I pressed on the gas, urging the truck to go forward.

I parked the truck and stepped out. Everything seemed erriely quiet and foreboding to me. I made myself peer through the first floor windows. How I longed to break in and walk through those rooms again, emersing myself in the memory of it all, making myself remember and forget all at the same time.

I walked around to the garage, and I froze. Someone was here. The car was a nice Lexus, and I recollected from a car magazine that Jacob had lying around one day that it was one of the newer models. It wasn't Edward's car, but then again, that model would be old to him and he probably would have something newer then his Volvo.

Panic struck me for a brief moment. I collected myself and decided that this would have to be enough before I was discovered.

It was then that a familiar voice rang out from behind me, stopping me cold in my tracks.

"Hello Bella."

The voice made me want to weep and laugh at the same time. I struggled with myself on whether to turn around. Slowly I turned. I took in the marble figure in front of me. He was exactly as I remembered him, not that I was expecting him to change much.

I deliberately walked up to him slowly, not wanting to appear eager. "Hello Jasper."

"It's good to see you again." He looked at me more and suddenly the anxiousness that I felt as a result of finally seeing a Cullen after all these years melted away. It was replaced by calmness, and I knew the vampire in front of me was responsible for that.

I nodded in response to his comment. "How long have you been here?"

He looked at me, and I knew that he took in the fact that I deliberately did not respond that it was good to see him as well. "I have only been here for a couple of days. I was hoping to see you Bella. I did not realize it would be so soon, but I am glad you are here." He paused a moment, looking at me. "Would you like to come in?"

I paused. Would this be healthy for me to actually go in the house, talk to Jasper? Would this reverse all the work I had to put forward to move on? When I left, would I return to the state I was in right after my eighteeth birthday? I did not know if that was what I truly wanted, but I knew I could not, would not say no. I have been longing to re-enter this house for so many years. "Yes, I would like that very much."

That was one of the longest exchanges I have ever had with Jasper Cullen. As a rule, Edward used to have me stay away from him more often then not, especially when there was a chance we would be alone. The other Cullen's worried about Jasper and the possibility that he might decide to partake of the goods, so to speak. He had been a 'vegitarian' for years, but he was the only Cullen who ever lived as a true vampire, and he did that for well over one hundred years, before the guilt overtook him and Alice had found him.

As Jasper led me through the garage into the house, I decided to make polite conversation. "So….How have you been?"

I thought I noticed Jasper pause for the briefest moment before he answered. "I'll be fine."

I noticed the future tense in his answer. I was curious as to why he was currently not fine, but before I could ask, he led me to the living room. I stopped, looking around. I remembered Edward and myself here so many times, playing, laughing, talking. The memories rushed back once more, like a dam bursting wide open. It was too much. I felt like she was that young teenager again, and panic started to envelop me as I recalled the pain of Edward unleashed on me when he left.

I begin to feel dizziness overtake me, when I felt a cold hand touch my shoulder and the panic began to subside. I turned and looked at Jasper, concern tracing his face. I could tell that yet again, Jasper was trying to help me through this, he guided me to the couch in the middle of the room and urged me to sit down.

When I sat, he sat as well, noting that he stayed close, to assist me with my emotions that were running wild at the moment. "

"This is really difficult for you, isn't it?" he asked. I noticed then the hint of the southern accent that he had.

"Yes. I haven't stopped by here in years, to allow myself to move on, to forget. I have not been inside the house since everyone lived here years ago, and I am afraid that the memories got to be too much."

"So why stop by now? Not that I am not happy to see you of course." He added quickly. I looked into Jaspers eyes and knew he was genuinely happy to see me.

"I'm leaving. I just couldn't make myself leave Forks forever without seeing this part of my life one more time."

Jasper just nodded and unexpectedly grabbed one of my hands and put it in his for just a moment. He hand reminded me of Edwards, cold to the touch, but Jasper's grasp was somehow a bit firmer then Edwards. He looked me in the eyes. "Where are you going to, Bella?"

"Boston. I have a job in a publishing house there. I looked online and found this cute in-law apartment outside of the city in Andover, from what my new boss tells me, I am going to have a bear of a commute, but the apartment was just perfect and I couldn't resist. New England charm and all." I smiled at Jasper. It was easiest having him be the one here, not the others as he could help control the emotional rollercoaster I was going through.

Jasper smiled. "Well, I guess maybe we will see one another then."

I looked at him quizzically and then panic rode up at the idea that the Cullens were residing in New England, that Edward was in New England.

Jasper sensing my panic, raised his hand as if to tell me to stop. "It's not what you think. The Cullens are not there, Edward is NOT there. I live in southern Maine. It's not very far from Andover at all."

Confusion was now the primary emotion I was feeling at the moment. "Only you? Why only you? Why Southern Maine?"

Jasper smiled only what could be considered a sad smile. "I was hoping I would be able to talk to you while I was here. I haven't been with the Cullen's in a while."

"What? Then why are you here?"

Jasper's sadness reached his eyes. "I am here to remember too."


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: I was going to wait a few days to post this chapter, but I couldn't wait!! Wanted to get Jasper's POV out there. Hope you are all enjoying this so far! I have quite a few ideas in my head for this story, but I would love to hear what everyone thinks so far. Feedback makes me write more!!! Review! Review!! :)

Disclaimer: I own nothing of Twilight. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Damn, now I'm depressed.

Jasper's POV

I hadn't expected to run into Bella this way. I figured that Bella would probably stay as far away from the Cullen house as possible, an awful reminder of what my brother did to her, abandoning her, when he should have stayed with her, loved her, and protected her. Edward always did have a warped sense of right and wrong. Bella looked different then when I had last seen her. Previously, she was a girl of eighteen just beginning to come into her own. The past five years had changed her tremendously. I saw that she now wore a confidence about her, that her innocence was gone, and replaced with certain jadedness. I noticed that her physical appearance had changed as well, Bella was now twenty-three, the age I was when I was turned by Maria. Her body was more curvaceous, more muscularly defined then it used to be. It was obvious that Bella had been going to the gym for a while. Her hair was cut to her chin in a more modern style, and I noticed that she took to wearing makeup, not that she needed any to begin with. I wonder what Edward would think if he had ever seen the changes to her. Bella was now a woman.

Bella's sadness was a mirror to my own, and it increased my sadness twofold. I knew immediately that we were both here for the same reason. We both wanted to remember, and at the same time, to forget. It was nice talking to her again, although she did not know it, she was the only person I knew who would understand.

Bella's question "Wait, then why are you here?" brought me out of my thoughts and back into the present. I glanced at her quickly, knowing that my face was displaying the myriad of emotions I was feeling. My ability sometimes makes it very difficult for me to hide what I am feeling, especially when the person I am with is feeling the same thing. Although I usually considered my gift a blessing, times like this I considered it a curse.

"I am here to remember too. " I paused for a moment, and again took Bella's hands in my own. She was so warm, so alive. I could feel her blood pulsing underneath my hands. Five years ago, it would have taken all my restraint to resist the monster inside me, crying out for the sweet human blood encased in her body. Ever since Bella's eighteenth birthday though, I had worked very hard to control my bloodlust, build up my restraint. I was the reason for Bella's pain of the past five years, and I had vowed to myself after that night that I would never allow that to happen again. Even though I did not need it, I found myself taking a deep breath in. I mustered all the calm I could gather and focused it her way before I continued. Bella had already been through so much. The next words out of my mouth came out barely as a whisper. "I don't know how to tell you this, so I am just going to say it. Alice is dead."

I could feel Bella begin to get hysterical. I knew the calm I was sending her way would prevent her from actually having a fit, but a part of me was still expecting her to begin hyperventilating. I knew she wanted to know everything, she needed to know. Alice was one of her closest friends and that sense of friendship had not lessened even though five years had passed.

I continued detached as I could possibly make myself. Even though it was impossible for an Empath, I did not want to feel any more pain. "I was off hunting in the woods with Emmett that day. Alice received a vision that a pack of vampires were going to invade the town we lived in at that point. There was going to be a lot of innocent lives lost. Carlisle and Esme were on a trip to visit our friends in Denali. It was just Alice and Rosalie there when Alice had the vision. They did not have time to wait for Emmett and I to return. There were too many of them for just the two of them. Alice and Rosalie got to the majority of them, but eventually the pack overtook them. Rosalie barely got away with her life. Alice… "I struggled to continue. "Alice was not so lucky. I am not sure whether she saw her death coming or not, or if she knew the right thing was to keep fighting anyways, to protect the innocent. When Emmett and I returned, it was too late. Alice was gone. We were lucky that Rosalie was alive. "

Bella's voice cracked with the next question. "When? When did Alice…" I could tell Bella could not make herself say the words. She rephrased. "When did this happen?"

My eyes locked with Bella's. I am sure my sadness matched her own. "A little over a year ago. I have been spending the past year splitting my time between Southern Maine and different places that Alice and I have visited or lived. I go to remember the good times that we had. I can sometimes still smell her scent, in a piece of clothing she left behind or something she touched. It helps me feel like a part of her is still here with me, guiding me along, helping me by giving me just a glimpse of her for the briefest of moments. This was the last place I was set to visit. Alice and I had formed the strongest memories here. She was happiest here, especially after she met a good friend like you. This is my way of saying my final goodbye. "

Sympathy radiated from Bella. Her eyes were filled with understanding. She squeezed my hand. "I am here for that same reason. To say goodbye to Edward, to move on to the next chapter in my life. I am so sorry Jasper. I loved Alice. I wish…" she trailed off.

This time it was my turn to squeeze her hand. "I know. Alice always talked about coming back. She hated leaving you the way we did. She loved you like a sister and could not wait until you joined our family. We all did. But Edward is our brother and he begged us to please stay away, to let you forget. You never did though, did you?"

Bella shook her head. "No, I never did. Edward's leaving tormented me for years. I eventually snapped out of it, with the help of my friend Jacob. But it took a long time. After a while, after going away to college and living on my own, I did grow up and moved past his leaving. I know he wanted me to go on as if he never existed, but that would be like you pretending Alice never had. That would be insulting what the two of you had, just as it was insulting what Edward and I shared. " Bella paused, tears welling up in her eyes. "I wish I had been able to see Alice again. She was in every sense of the word my sister. Oh Jasper, I wish she was here."

I reached over and enveloped Bella in a hug. Sobs soon began to rack her small frame. If I had the capability to cry, I would have joined her. My only response was, "Me too, Bella. Me too."

After a long while, when she was ready, she pulled away from the embrace. Bella rubbed her eyes, revealing the red rims around them. Bella stood up. "So, why are you not with Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett?" I noted that she specifically left out Edward. She would ask when she was ready.

I shrugged. "I needed this time to be by myself, to heal. The grief that they were all feeling between Alice and Edwards departures…" I left the words hanging. When she did not interrupt I continued on. "Well, their grief compacted my own and it got to be too much. And as much as they grieved, they could not understand what I was going through. Their mates were still there. They were still…."

Bella interjected. "Whole. They were still whole."

I nodded, my sad smile appearing again. "You are the only one I know who would understand that. So, I had to leave. I still talk to them. Eventually I will see them again, but more time needs to pass before I can be in their presence. They knew I would visit here eventually, but do not know that I am currently here."

"How long are you staying?"

"Just a few more days, then I am heading back to New England." I looked at Bella. "You?"

"I leave tomorrow morning and take a flight out to Logan Airport. "

I glanced at her, knowing that there was more she needed to process. "Bella, I know you probably want to visit Edwards's room. I think it is best if you do that alone, let you get your own grief out without someone else interfering. I am going to leave to hunt, so feel free to take your time." I walked towards the back door, ready to exit into the expansive woods. I paused. "It was really good to see you Bella. I… I missed you." I turned away.

"Jasper?' Bella's voice sounded a little frantic.

I turned and looked at her. A small smile traced her face. "Maybe… maybe since I will be living near Boston and you are going to be so close anyways, I was hoping…. I mean, I won't know anyone there…"

For the first time in what seemed like an eternity, a genuine smile came across my lips. "I would like that. I'll contact you."

Bella nodded. And with that, I ran into the forest, giving Bella the privacy she needed to hopefully move on once and for all from my brother.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's note: Short chapter. I felt that I needed to write this chapter, but did not think that it needed to go into any great length. Every time I added more, it seemed unnecessary to me and I hope you like. Thanks to everyone that has already reviewed this, set to their favorites, or tagged it to know when the next chapter is up. It's really encouraging to know you all like it! Thank you so much again. And please, review! I promise it makes me write faster. In my head I am many chapters ahead. If only my fingers were as fast. 

Disclaimer: I own nothing of Twilight. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Damn, now I'm depressed.

BELLA'S POV

After Jasper took off into the trees to hunt, I sat back down on the couch, putting my head in between my legs. I felt dizzy. This was all too much. The house, the memories of Edward, and Alice. Alice, who till this day I still considered my best friend, was gone. It still had not sunk in yet, probably wouldn't for a while. I never got to tell her how much her friendship meant to me, how much I had missed her these past few years. I would never get to say goodbye. Edward took that away from me as well.

My thoughts drifted to Jasper. My heart broke for him when he gave me the news. Alice had always been his rock and his biggest supporter. She was the one who introduced him to this lifestyle, encouraged him when the path seemed difficult. She saved him. I remember the others always treated him like he would cave in any second, like he was not strong enough to resist. In that sense, Jasper and I were very much alike. The Cullen's always seemed to underestimate the both of us.

When he broke the news to me, he appeared to be calm. To the average person, it would seem that he was handling the loss well. But when I looked at him, he looked haunted. His eyes seemed to be two pools of infinite sorrow. His look reminded me of my first year without Edward. He was going through the motions, trying to make it through every day. I knew it was taking all his strength not to break down and to stay calm around me. I was glad that he was here, and I was glad that he was going to be living in the same vicinity as me. It would be nice to have someone who I knew in the area, someone who understood me and the events that played such a deep, important chapter in my life. That chapter helped define who I am today.

I looked at the stairwell and sighed. I knew my musings were just delaying the inevitable. I pushed aside thoughts of Alice and Jasper and made my way to the staircase. I put my hand on the rail and climbed every stair slowly, deliberately. Now that I was here, on the precipice of entering his room my hand on the door knob, I was not in any rush. Truth was, I was terrified. I looked down the hallway at the various rooms and considered going to Carlisle's office or Emmett's room. Any room but Edward's. I shook my head to myself. This was something I had wanted to do for five long years, and I was not about to chicken out now. My eyes focused on the door, and I pushed it open. I took quick inventory of his room. The room was still essentially the same, just like the rest of the house. The couch that we had sat and talked on so many times was still there on the side of the room. I walked to the shelves that filled an entire wall in the room and held his records and books. My fingers lightly grazed them lovingly, as if it was Edward himself. His love of classical music was apparent. I bet if his human life hadn't been taken away by illness at seventeen, he would have been a proficient at the piano and perhaps made a career in music.

I took a few steps and opened the closet door. Some of his clothes were still there. I smiled softly. Even though it had been five years, he could have worn most of these clothes today and still been considered stylish. I always thought of Edward as timeless, classic. His clothes had naturally translated into that as well. I grabbed one of his grey sweaters from the shelf and held it to my face. I inhaled deeply. The sweater even smelled like him still to my amazement. I could practically feel the sweet breath of Edward on me at that moment.

I took a seat on the couch and stared out the window into the forest. I wondered what Edward was doing right that moment, what he would say if he knew I was back in his room, rifling through his things? It had been a long time since I had wondered what Edward Cullen was doing. I allowed my mind to envision different scenarios of his current life. Was he by himself living on his own perhaps? He had mentioned to me several times his love of travel and of Europe. Or was he living with the Cullen's now? It appeared that he had not been prior to Alice's passing. I had wanted to ask the question to Jasper, but I was not ready. I did want to know what he was up to, how he was handling life after "us". Maybe someday, when I see Jasper in New England, maybe then I can ask. But I can't now. Not yet.

Before I realized it, day had turned to dusk and the room was getting dark. Had I really been sitting that long, just thinking about Edward? I touched my face, feeling tears I had not even been aware I had been crying. I wiped my eyes with Edwards's sweater and placed it back on the shelf in the closet. I closed the door, and looked at the wall in front of me.

The wall was still adorned with pictures of the Cullen's. There was one picture that I paid particular attention to. It was Emmett, Rosalie, Edward and myself. Emmett and Rosalie were embraced in a tight hug, and Edward and I were laughing, his hand entwined with mine, his face pointed towards the camera. It was a moment of complete happiness. My finger traced his perfect face. I took in his eyes, his bronze colored hair, and his snow white complexion.

He was happy. I was happy. We both had been happy. He stated that he had loved me, cared for me, would be mine until the end of time. But that was not the case. He left me in those woods, left me by myself in shambles to be exact, left me a hollow shell of a person until years later when I learned how to love myself again, learn that I was worthy to be loved. Left me to become the Bella Swan I am today.

I grabbed the door knob and opened the door to leave. It was then I realized, I don't need him. I don't even want him. I don't need to look to him for validation, for acceptance. I don't need to be in his room, look at his things, and bask in his memory anymore. Looking at his things brought me back memories, but that was all. I cried for my lost years, but I would not change the past now even if I could.

I let go of the door knob, turned away from his door, and walked away forever. Edward did not hold any power over me now. I was free once and for all.


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note: Yes, this chapter is Bella's POV as well. I promise, there is a lot more of Jasper's POV coming up, but the beginning chapter's have to more be seen from her end! This is definitely more a lighter chapter, which I think we need after the last few! The next chapter may be a few days as my son is about to turn 1 this week and I am going to be pretty busy trying to get the house in order for the party. But knowing me, I will find a few minutes to sit down and finish writing the next chapter!! Enjoy and Review!!!

Disclaimer: Disclaimer: I own nothing of Twilight. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Damn, now I'm depressed.

Bella's POV

I stretched my arms and legs as I stepped off the plane into the airport terminal. That was a LONG flight. There was turbulence almost from the get go, and I was a nervous flier to begin with. With every jolt, every bounce, I counted down the minutes till my feet could feel concrete again. When the plane finally touched down and landed on the airstrip, I thought I might burst into applause. That had to have been the worst flight I had ever been on.

I quickly located the baggage claim area and grabbed my two suitcases. I walked outside, the humidity hitting me like a wall. It must have been about ninety-five degrees and the sun was out in full force. Jasper decided to live here? If it was like this all the time, how did he ever get outside? Edward had told me of Jasper's past in the south and how Vampire's down there do tend to only come out at night. I couldn't picture Jasper wanting to go back to that lifestyle though. I quickly found a balding man in a suit holding a sign that read- "Bella Swan". That was my flight van to bring me to my new dwelling.

Giddiness and nerves fought for dominance within me. Giddiness won out. I couldn't contain my grin as I let myself soak up the sun's rays quickly before I ducked into the van. I was excited to finally be here. My new career was waiting in publishing and I was finally going to be living on my own, without any roommates or parents. I was an adult, ready to take on the world. No worries about curfews, upset parents, crazy college roommates, or term papers. I was going to be completely self-sufficient. Watch out Boston, here comes Isabella Swan.

When the van finally pulled up to my new abode (my publisher was right when she warned me that it was going to be an awful commute into Boston), my excitement bubbled over. I tipped the driver and grabbed my bags. From the outside, the apartment was just as I expected it. It was an apartment above a Garage which looked almost like an old barn, and the attaching house looked quite like a proper Bostonian house should look. My new landlord was obviously an avid gardener; there were wildflowers as far as the eye could see. I was happy to note that the Garage was a detached Garage which was fairly far from the house. My landlord had told me I could use the garage as my own, as neither her husband nor she ever used it. I had not even been inside and I was already in love with the place. Long commute be damned.

The landlord had advised that she would be in Cape Cod the week I arrived, so she had arranged for the key to be placed outside by the door of the apartment the morning of my arrival. When I opened up the apartment, I was floored. The place was quaint and cozy. One of the benefits of this place was it came already furnished. The mother had needed to be placed in a nursing home, and the owner was not ready to part with all her mother's belongs. I was the lucky benefactor to it all. The living room was attached to the kitchen. Both were small, but fit my needs perfectly. The living room held a couch that I knew would be just perfect for when I wanted to curl up with a good book. The bathroom was plain, but did hold a big soaking tub. I already had plans for that tub later this evening. I walked into the bedroom. The bedroom was good sized and held a queen sized wrought iron bed. Perhaps my favorite feature of the whole apartment was the porch that was attached to the bedroom. I walked out to the porch, and was greeted by another lovely garden. I did not think I could get luckier.

I walked down the stairs to the garage. I had purchased a car, sight unseen, via the internet. The only requirement was that the previous owners be able to drop it off. This was a huge risk I took, but unfortunately, a necessary one. I was starting my job on Monday, which was five days from then. I opened the garage. The used SUV I bought appeared on the outside to be in good condition, its black exterior was void of any damage save a scratch or two. I opened the door, the interior was clean and the key hung in the ignition. The true test. I turned the key, making a silent prayer that the car would start. The engine roared to life. I decided I would take a quick tour of the neighborhood to make sure that the car was in good working order.

The car ran perfect. With the exception of the turbulent flight, this was turning out to be a perfect day. The sun was beginning to set when I returned from the drive around the neighborhood, and walked back into the kitchen again. I noticed a bouquet of flowers sitting on the kitchen table that I missed last time I entered the apartment. The arrangement was a stunning array of bright pink Hibiscus's mixed with white Magnolia's. The card that was attached simply read the following:

_Welcome Home._

_Jasper Whitlock_

I smiled at the card. Well, that was fast. While I did not doubt Jasper's ability to locate me in Andover, I did not think he could do it quite so quickly. The arrangement was breathtaking. I liked the magnolia's the best. It reminded me of Jasper and his southern heritage. I noticed that Jasper had gone back to using his human last name and left out any mention of the name Cullen. Alice had told me his last name in a conversation ages before, and I had admitted back then that I liked the last name Whitlock better then Cullen. It seemed more of a proper fit on Jasper, at least. I flipped over the card mindlessly while in thought and I observed that the back of the card also had a number on it. That must have been his cell phone number.

I pulled out my cell and dialed the number. The voice that answered had that familiar velvet richness to it with the touch of southern accent I remembered liking from the moment I heard it so long ago.

"Hello, Bella."

"Thank you for the flowers. They are striking. So, how did you locate me so quickly? It has not even been twenty four hours since I have been in Forks."

I could tell that Jasper was smiling, even through the phone. "It was easier then you think. You had already forwarded your mailing address, Bella."

Duh. "So when are you coming back this way?"

Jasper was quiet for a moment and I could sense a little struggle to get out the next words. "I am getting ready to leave tomorrow."

My eyebrow's furrowed in concern. My next questions were careful. I did not want to overstep my boundaries of our newfound friendship. "Are you okay? How are you handling being there?"

"I am okay. It's harder than I thought being back here. Alice's memory is everywhere here. I miss her."

Tears sprang to my eyes. His voice was so sincere and he sounded so lost. I told him the only thing I knew was true. "It will be okay, Jasper. I promise. It gets easier."

"I know."

"Listen, when you get back to New England, come visit me. I start work on Monday. I know I could use a friend." What I did not say was, _it looks like you could use one too._

"I would like that. I am glad you liked the flowers, Bella."

"I love them, Jasper. I will see you soon, okay? Take care in the meantime."

"You too. Bye."

"Goodbye." I closed the cell phone. I felt so much sorrow for Jasper. I wanted to be there for him, I wanted to help him through his grief. I looked at the white and hot pink bouquet again. Jasper really was so thoughtful and considerate. Even in his pain, he still took a moment to think about me, Bella Swan. The girl who was responsible in some way for tearing apart his family and leading to the events of Alice's death, even if was not directly. He knew what would make me feel like this was home. The fact that he could even think about buying flowers to make someone feel welcome while still going through his own personal hell was no less then amazing and a testament to what a wonderful person Jasper Cullen, no wait, Jasper _Whitlock_ was.

No wonder why Alice had loved him so much.


	6. Chapter 6

Slow and Steady Chapter Six

Author's Note: Thank you all so much for your reviews! I appreciate them all and I am so sorry I have not had a chance to respond to you all individually. This week has been crazy for me but I really wanted to get this chapter out there for everyone since you all have been so sweet and nice. This chapter is going back to Jasper's POV. Remember, please review and let me know what you think! Again, it will probably be a few days due to my son's birthday this weekend.

Disclaimer: Own nothing of Twilight. I just play with the characters.

Jasper's POV

I stepped through the doorway, sighing as I placed the keys on the table. I wish I could say it was good to be home, but I wasn't quite sure where home was anymore. It wasn't in Forks, it wasn't with the Cullen's, and I was still not sure if it was here. Home used to be where Alice was. But Alice wasn't there anymore. I ruffled through the mail that had come in over the past few weeks. Nothing came in of any real consequence. I walked around the house, drifting from room to room. Nothing really held my attention and I found my thoughts frequently drifting to my Alice. Realizing an hour passed that I was just wandering with no real purpose or intent, I decided that I needed to be distracted.

I took out my cell phone. The one good thing that came out of my trip to Forks was that I was able to get reacquainted with Bella again. I still could not get over how she had changed, how grown up she had become. It was nice to see her, and it was nicer to know that she was in the area. It would be good not to be alone right now. I had lived a solitary life for the past year and every day had been struggle. I looked in my call history on the cell phone and dialed the number.

"Hello?" The soft voice answered.

"Hi Bella. It's your friendly neighborhood vampire calling."

"Jasper! Hey! Are you back yet?" Bella's voice sounded genuinely happy to hear me.

"I got in a while ago. What are you up to?"

"Nothing much. Just still getting acquainted with my apartment situation."

I knew I was probably intruding and the on the verge of being rude, but I was restless and needed to get out of the house I just arrived back at. "Would you like some company?"

"That would be wonderful. I know it's only been a couple of days since I have been here, but it's a little lonely. I would love to see a familiar face."

I smiled. It was good to know that I wasn't the only person who felt alone at the moment. "Perfect. Can I bring you anything?"

She declined the offer and I took down her address. I figured I could probably get there in about thirty minutes with the way I drive. I walked out to the garage. It was a little past three in the afternoon and the sky was overcast with no sign of the sun making an appearance. It seemed like a good day to take the Ducati out for a drive. I hopped on my bike and let the engine rev underneath me. This bike was my gift to myself after Alice was gone. Alice had loved fast vehicles, porches, Lamborghini's, and Ferrari's. You name it, if it could go over 200 miles per hour, she had wanted to drive it. But when it came to motorcycles, Alice had refused to even touch one so I only borrowed Emmett's when Alice was out hunting with Rosalie and was not around to see me. Of course, she always knew I drove it and there was hell to pay later.

I weaved through the uncrowded streets of Maine and New Hampshire. When I first came up north with Peter and Charlotte, we had made a stop in New England during the autumn season. The beauty of it had stuck with me after all those years. I could not wait for the leaves to change and bike through the White Mountains during the peak foliage season. I knew Bella had never been anywhere really outside of Washington and Phoenix, maybe she would want to keep me company on that trip. I made a mental note to ask her, and turned onto the highway.

Soon I was in Andover, and found the street sign titled Marken Way. This was it. I parked at the third house on the left as Bella instructed. I jumped off the bike, looked at my watch and smiled to myself. Thirty minutes on the dot.

I bounded up the stairs to Bella's apartment door. Before I could knock, the familiar brunette opened the doorway. She smiled, appraising me with her eyes. In less than twenty seconds, she wrapped me in a hug.

"It's good to see you Jasper." She stated as she pulled away. "I mean, I know it has only been a couple of days, but it was so long before that." She looked down past me at the bike. I felt Bella fill up with awe. "Is that yours? You own a Ducati?"

Bella moved past me like I did not exist and ran down the stairs to the bike. I smiled as Bella lovingly fingered the leather seat and sat on the Ducati placing her hands on the handles. "I didn't know you liked motorcycles, Bella."

Bella was positively radiant. "I began riding bikes midway through senior year. My friend Jacob helped me build my first bike. I found I loved the speed, the thrill of the ride. I had to leave my bike back in Forks. This is a beautiful bike. I mean, really beautiful. Can we ride it?"

I laughed in the first time in forever. "You look like a kid on Christmas. How can I say no?"

Bella clapped in delight and jumped off the bike to allow me to get on. "Where should we go?"

I straddled the bike quickly and motioned for her to get behind me. "Let's go to the ocean. You haven't seen the Atlantic yet." I felt Bella move in behind me, her body pressed tightly against mine. Excitement flowed all throughout Bella's body. I was really enjoying getting to know this side of her. I chuckled to myself at the idea of my brother seeing Bella on a bike. I think if he had been human, he would have had coronary at just the thought of his Bella riding on such a dangerous machine. Lord forbid Edward ever treated Bella like she was not a fragile flower.

I revved the engine, and felt Bella sigh contently behind me. This was Bella's element. I took off down the street probably a little faster then I should have with Bella behind me. Her fingers dug into my waist, and I could feel her heart pounding. We went driving up the seventeen miles of coast of New Hampshire. There were some beautiful views that way. The happiness that enveloped Bella was wonderful to experience and I absorbed it all within me, cherishing it.

I wanted to continue on the bike ride, relishing these feelings that Bella emitted, but it was beginning to get dark. As we returned to Bella' apartment, disappointment began to creep into her mood, but there was also contentment.

We reluctantly climbed off the bike. I leaned against the Ducati. "So did you enjoy how she rides?"

"Jasper, if you ever so much as think of getting rid of that fine piece of machinery, I may hurt you." Bella surprised me by giving me a quick peck on the cheek. "Thank you. That was the most fun I have had in long time."

"Me too." I replied. "The pleasure was all mine. We should do it again."

The grin she got went from ear to ear. I did not think it could get bigger. "I am holding you to that." She climbed the stairs, stopping at the door. "Would you like to come in and see my place?"

She moved out of the doorway and I walked in the apartment. It was tiny, but I can see Bella loving it because what it lacked in space, it did make up for in charm. I saw my bouquet of flowers on the kitchen table. The familiar scent of the Magnolia's and Hibiscus wafted through out the dwelling. "Do you like it?" I asked. I already knew the answer.

She positively beamed for the tenth time that day. "I love it. It is so cozy. What do you think? Do you like it?"

I couldn't help myself, her excitement was contagious. I smiled. "I really do like it. It fits you."

She then invited me to sit down on the couch. We sat and talked for what seemed like hours. We reminisced about Charlie, Forks, and some of the kids we had gone to school with. The emotions I got from Bella were so refreshing. It was a like coming upon a clean spring and drinking right from the source. For what seemed like the twentieth time in three days, I found myself smiling sincerely at Bella. There was no pity, no sympathy, just genuine contentment for my company. I heard Bella then mention the name Alice.

My face immediately betrayed my emotions as I found myself wrapped in the familiarity of my personal grief.

Bella reeked of concern. "Jasper?" she put her hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry; I should not have mentioned her name."

I smiled sadly at Bella. "I'm sorry, Bella. This happens sometimes. I will begin to feel normal for a brief moment and then I will think her name or recollect a memory, and it's... it's just very, very difficult."

Bella nodded. Again she understood. Five years ago she was in the same boat, but to her it probably felt like yesterday. Bella moved closer to me on the couch. Never taking her eyes off me, she put her tiny hand under my chin and lifted my eyes to hers. Her eyes were kind and thoughtful and searched mine. What she was looking for, I was not sure. Bella smiled that small smile again. "You have been through so much this past year, Jasper. I can tell you are carrying around so much pain. I am not an empath like you but I can feel it. I felt it several days ago, I felt it on the phone yesterday, and I feel it now. You have been all alone with no one there to be your friend, to help you through your grief. Eventually, it is going to eat you alive. I know."

Bella did not move her eyes from mine, but did drop her hand down to her lap and her voice turned soft. "I would love it if you would let me in, let me be your friend. You know I have special insight to what you are going through. We have both lost a member of the Cullen family who we loved dearly. Let me try to help."

I found myself opening up to Bella. My grief came off of me in waves then and the floodgates opened. "The weight of the past year had been so much, so difficult, Bella. Forks was my last stop on my "Tour de Alice" as I came to call it. After that, there were no more places for me to visit, no more places for me to remember her. No more memories for me to recall and relive. Yesterday getting ready to leave Forks was especially hard. Coming back here to my house, coming back to Maine meant it was done and over. For me, the visits had given me a reason to keep going day to day. There was always one more trip to plan, one more place to visit. The reality is, Alice is gone she is never coming back. In a way, I am grateful that it was not what you had to experience with Edward. At least I have closure, yours was always an uncertain future which I think would have be more excruciating."

I searched to see if I had gone too far with mentioning Edward. Bella just nodded, encouraging me to continue, so I did. "Never again will I see that knowing smile or that fake look of shock when I try to surprise her with a gift. Alice was my world, and all that is left is broken pieces, shards of the world I knew. For over the past year, I had convinced myself that if I went to all the places we had ever gone or lived in for an extended period, that when it was all said and done with, I would be healed and I would be restored. Her memory would be forever with me, but I would be able to move on in life, perhaps move back with my family. I don't think that is possible now in the current condition I am in." I paused. "I don't know that I would be a good friend, Bella."

Bella's eyes watered. She broke our gaze and pulled me back into another embrace. It was soothing. After a few moments, she released me and faced me. "Well Jasper Whitlock, good friend or not, you are going to be stuck with me. You are the only person I know here, and I need you as much as you need me. Alice was a wonderful person and when you are in mourning grief is not simply a switch that you can turn on and off. You of all people should know that. You make it sound like you want to forget Alice. You shouldn't forget her, you should embrace the life that she led and we should both be very grateful that for a few moments on this earth, we were lucky enough to be in her company. "

We were both silent for a few minutes as she let absorb that last statement. She leaned back on the couch to where I was and laid her head on my chest. Quietly she stated. "Tell me a story about Alice."


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Note: Wow. Again, thank you for the response to the last chapter. I was really unsure about that one, and your kind words were so great to hear! So THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! I could not sleep last night, so this is a result of a 2am writing spree since I could not get this scene out of my head. I may be exhausted today, but hopefully you all enjoy the chapter coming about 5 days early. I think I was so encouraged to write quickly because of the positive response I got on the last chapter in last two days. Thank you all again.

Disclaimer: Don't own twilight. I just play with the characters.

For two months it was like that. Every few days I saw Jasper, and every time I had the same request. "Jasper, tell me a story about Alice." I would gage his response to see how he reacted. I may not have his ability to read emotions, but I was still pretty good at reading him. At first, I could tell it was difficult for him to think of Alice, but he would still tell me a story about her. After a while however, I found that he was looking forward to telling me a new story about the two of them. Sometimes the stories were funny, such as the time Alice had "accidently" wrecked Emmett's car because she hated the color so much only to find that Emmett got the exact same car with the exact same color the very next day on a whim that she couldn't have seen. Sometimes the stories were sweet, such as the time that Alice and him were on a secluded beach in Oregon and declared their love for one another. With each story, I got another piece of the puzzle that was Jasper and Alice, and with each story, I felt the pain that Jasper felt melt a little further and further away.

The summer months had fled quickly and it was now Mid-October. It was early Friday morning, and I noticed that there was frost outlining my kitchen window. It was rare I had a weekday off, but my boss was more than happy to accommodate my vacation request. Looking at the small ice particles on that glass pane made me begin to second guess if I should have just worked in my steady 75 degree cubicle. The reason I had the day off is that Jasper insisted that we go for one last bike ride before he put the Ducati away for the winter. He wanted to take a weekend trip up north. I had been excited to go, but I was now thinking I might freeze on the bike. Still, this was the most excited I had ever seen Jasper, and I was not going to be the one to dampen his spirits.

I heard the familiar sound of the bike pull up the driveway and a minute later, a knock at the door. _He is early,_ I thought to myself as I shuffled over in my pj's and slippers to the door. I opened the door to find a smiling Jasper, complete with coffee and donuts. _Where on earth did he put those on the bike?_ But still the aroma of the coffee pulled me out of my musings and I gladly took the cup he offered.

"Good Morning. Are you ready?"

I could practically feel Jasper's anticipation. I rolled my eyes, but smirked at him, amusement clear in my eyes. "Uh… does it look like I am ready?" I asked, motioning with my hand to the pajamas and slippers I was wearing. "You showed up an hour early Jasper. I was just getting ready to get dressed. Unless of course, you want your riding partner to be wearing fluffy bunny slippers."

He laughed. I loved it when he genuinely laughed. When he first came here, it was such a rare occurrence, but now it's happened more frequently. "Get dressed. Do you have everything else for the weekend ready?"

I just nodded and walked into the bedroom and stared at the closet, trying to figure out what to wear for today. The weatherman stated that it was going to be in the mid-sixties this weekend, but I did not believe it. I finally decided on some long johns, a pair of dark jeans, and a dark purple sweater. My winter leather jacket should keep me warm enough for the ride. I threw on my running shoes and headed out to the living room. I found Jasper staring out the kitchen window.

I tapped him on the shoulder lightly. "Penny for your thoughts?"

He looked down. I was expecting the normal sadness that crept in when he was pensive, but instead I was surprised to find that he looked content. "Just thinking about our trip. I think you will like it. I have a couple of surprises in store. Don't complain."

I groaned. What is it with the Cullen family and their love of surprises? "Alright. I promise to not complain about the surprises."

Jasper kissed me on the top of the head and replied, "That's my girl. Now finish your coffee, have a donut, and let's get out of here."

I quickly wolfed down my breakfast. We left the apartment, hopping on the bike. I climbed in my now familiar seat behind Jasper and listed to engine roar to life as we took off for prettier country. I felt so good right here. Being on the bike, my hair flying all around, Jasper's company. In the past two months we had been all over on this vehicle, we had bonded and become good friends, wait, make that best friends, taking various trips up and down the coast of Maine and Massachusetts. I was sad thinking that we had to put it away for the winter. Jasper felt that emotion.

"You okay?" He stated as we pulled to stop.

I squeezed his waist with my hands. "Yeah, I was just thinking how I am going to miss these trips."

He turned his head sideways to look at me. "I know. Me too. But there is always next spring. And if there is a really nice November day, maybe we could go out then too."

The light turned green then, and we took off onto the highway. The further north we got, the more everything was changing around us. Finally, after two and a half hours, Jasper pulled into a dirt parking lot. The parking lot overlooked a good portion of the Presidential Range in the White Mountains. This far north, the trees were alive with colors. I had never seen anything quite like it. Instead of the normal yellow or brown that I grew up with during the autumn season, the leaves were brilliant shades of Red, Orange, and even purple in some areas. I was blown away. I was off the bike and this point, just staring out at the view in front us. "Wow."

I had not even realized that Jasper had moved next to me. He spoke softly. "It's beautiful, isn't it? I came here years ago, to this very spot with Peter and Charlotte. They couldn't appreciate the beauty of it, the serenity. I guess my ability just makes me more sensitive to that. It was the one time prior to meeting Alice that I felt whole… untainted. I have always longed to come back to this place".

I looked up at Jasper and my heart took an extra beat. He looked so at peace at the moment. His dirty blonde hair was disheveled from the wind, but still managed to somehow look like he walked off a magazine shoot. His face was the normal vampire perfection I had become accustomed to. The most beautiful part about him was his eyes. The eyes did not have the look like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders anymore and I don't think I realized until then that his eyes were more captivating then even Edwards had been. I unconsciously reached out for his hand, wanting to share this moment with just him. His hand squeezed mine tightly, and I squeezed back. I realized I liked the feel of his hand in mine; I was not sure what to make of that at the moment so I filed it away for later to process when my brain had a few extra moments.

"Thank you, Bella." He never stopped looking off into the forest.

"For what?"

"You pulled me from the brink. You made me realize that even though Alice isn't physically here, she is in here." He took his free hand and touched his heart. "Alice did not ever visit New England in the fall with me. I am in a way glad; now I get to have this memory with you, my new best friend. You made this place home."

Jasper always knew the correct thing to say to make me feel valued and cared for. I was so grateful for his friendship. I turned to look at him then. "It's I who should be thanking you. I did not think that I would ever be lucky enough have another friend as good as my friend Jacob back in Forks. As much as my college friends and I had fun, they never really understood who I was. It was unfair of me to expect them too. They never knew this side of my life, and with any luck, they would always be blissfully ignorant of the vampire world. But I felt like there was a part of myself that I was always denying when I was with them. Now I don't feel that way anymore."

Jasper slowly turned to me then. His smile transformed his whole face. He squeezed my hand on more time. "You are something else, Bella. Are you sure you are not the Empath?"

"Pretty sure." I replied.

After a few more moments, Jasper let go of my hand. When he got on the bike, he advised that we needed to get something for me to eat. I weakly protested, but knew he was correct. He stated that we would stop by the place we were staying at for the night, and then it was up to me if I wanted to eat in or go out.

We pulled up to a nice lodge. We parked in front of the main lodge; Jasper got the keys to our place while I remained on the bike. We then drove up a small road. A log cabin loomed before us, two stories tall, but not overly so. We unloaded and grabbed what small belongings we had brought with us. Upon entering, I had fallen in love with the place. The living room was the first room you entered. High cathedral ceilings greeted us, along with a giant fireplace and flat screen TV. The kitchen was huge. I opened up the fridge and saw that the owners had taken care of supplying it with the necessities, probably at Jasper's request. My stomach growled, but I decided to trek up the stairs the bedroom anyways. The king size bed was on one side of the room with another flat screen TV. I walked into the bathroom and saw the biggest Jacuzzi tub in the history of man. Just when I thought it could not get any better, the outside porch had a hot tub. I mentally chastised myself for not bringing a suit.

I heard Jasper climbing the stairs behind me as I sat gazing longingly at the hot tub. As if reading my mind, he stated. "There is a suit hanging in the closet. I guessed your size when I told the concierge what I was looking for. I hope you don't mind. I would have just told you, but I wanted it to be a surprise."

"This is wonderful. I mean, way too expensive, but it is perfect. This will be such a great weekend away."

"So do you want to eat here or at a restaurant?"

I told him the truth. "After being on the bike all morning, I am anxious for a break. Why don't I make something here?" My hand touched his arm. "Do you need to hunt?" I was not sure of the last time he had eaten.

"Not yet, I was planning to while you were in bed tonight."

I made myself lunch and we spent the early afternoon hours just lounging around the cabin. Around two, we decided to go tour the surroundings some more and enjoy the warmer weather. The weatherman had been correct. Cloudy but mild. We went up the scenic Kangamangus Highway and stopped along a small trail, where we walked a mile or two into the forest. We did not talk much, but I could tell that Jasper was enjoying himself as much as I. It was nice just to walk in silence and listen to the sounds of nature without inane chatter. We got back to the cabin around sunset. I decided that I still just wanted to relax in the cabin. I opened a bottle of wine while Jasper got a fire going in the fireplace. It was warm and comfortable.

When I was done eating, I noticed Jasper had curled up with a Civil War book. As good as that sounded, the first thing I wanted to do was soak in the Jacuzzi tub. I walked up stairs and let the tub fill up. I noticed an assortment of bath salts and I poured in some that smelled like Jasmine. I slowly got in the tub, letting my body adjust to the heat. I closed my eyes, and let my mind wander back to the gorgeous mountain view that we had first stopped at. It was then I began thinking about holding Jasper's hand. He and I had never held hands before, ever. The feel of his hand felt so natural, so wanted. I was disappointed when he had let go of it. My mind began then processing other things that I had not consciously been aware of prior to this revelation. The feelings I get when I am around him are of complete and utter ease. I unconsciously lean into him whenever we are on the bike now. I enjoy his company and his conversation and I always look forward to the days I get to spend with Jasper.

I wasn't sure what to make of all this. Was it possible I was developing feelings for him? The problem was, he did not need me or want me like that even if it was true. He needed me to be his friend, help him with his grief with Alice. And that is what I would do. With a new determination, I got out of the tub, and got dressed in my pajama's I had brought. They were flannel plaid blue pajamas with a tight blue top. I dried my hair and brushed it out and headed downstairs.

I saw Jasper still caught up in the book. I took a moment to look over him. All these months we had been friends, and I never really took in Jasper. There he was, lying there across the floor in front of the fireplace. The denim blue jeans he wore we dark and clean cut, as he always was. He had a white collared shirt on underneath his grey sweater. You could tell underneath the sweater that he had a nice body. When Jessica and that set used to talk about the Cullens, they would always go on and on about Edward's perfect looks and Emmett's body. But now that I am really looking at him, I realize that underneath, his body is probably the most cut. Emmett has mass and is definitely strong. He reminds me a big teddy bear. Edward, well, he had a lean and hard physique. I realized that Jasper was a combination of the two qualities. His arms were definitely more defined then Edwards, thinking back to the many times that Jasper and I had hugged. I saw that his biceps and chest muscles strained lightly against his sweater. And his hands… I remembered then that I was in the presence of Empath. _You idiot, Bella._ My cheeks were flushed and Jasper looked up at my obvious embarrassment I had felt just then.

"Hey Bella, are you going to come and join me?" He gave me a concerned look, obviously from the inundation of feelings that have been hitting me like a wall. Confusion, embarrassment, surprise, and he probably felt some desire too.

I nodded. The less I think about him, the better. He needs _you to be his friend and that is exactly what you are going to be Bella Swan. Besides, isn't falling in love with just one vampire enough for a lifetime?_ I grabbed a book from the shelf and plopped down next to him determined to put these thought to bed. The book was moderately entertaining, and I found myself getting engrossed in the story. A couple of hours later, I felt Jasper move over closer to me. I looked up, catching him staring.

"You okay?" I asked.

He nodded. "I did not want to interrupt you. You were so enthralled with the story you are reading. "

I smiled and Jasper smiled back. "It is a really good story. Listen, I know the weekend isn't over, but I wanted to say thank you for everything. You have been such an amazing friend. I can't believe years ago, I did not realize how great you were."

Jaspers response was to put his arm around my shoulder and give it a little squeeze. "This weekend was my way of saying Thank you for being my friend." He turned my body so I was leaning against him, my back pressing into his stomach, and wrapped his arms around me tightly. He whispered, "Continue reading."

It was hard containing my emotions so Jasper would not feel everything I was thinking at that moment. The last thing I wanted him to know was the sudden chaos that was raging inside my head at my newfound thoughts. Nevertheless, I found myself melting into his touch and relaxing. Jasper was my friend first and foremost and I wanted to find something that I could do for him that was just as nice as this weekend was for me.

I put down my book. There is no way I was going to be able to read now. My eyes focused on the flames jumping in front of me. "Jasper, tell me a story. But this time, tell me a story about your life as a human."

Jasper raised his eyes at first in surprise but then smiled and obliged. I felt my eyes getting heavy as he told me in soft tones what he remembered about his youth and growing up in the south. His voice got a faraway feel as he described Texas in the 1850's. I could tell that his human life had been a happy one and it wasn't until after he was turned that the nightmare began. Between the fire, the comforting embrace, and the waves of relaxation that I knew Jasper was sending my way, I fell asleep in his arms, happier then I had been in a long time.


	8. Chapter 8

Author's Note: So this is from Jasper's POV. Same chapter as the last one for the most part, but just from his perspective. For some reason, this chapter was really difficult to write and I rewrote it about 4 times, so I would love to know if you all liked it. I really wanted to thank you all for your comments lately. They were really motivating to push through this chapter when I revised it for the fourth time. Thank you! I am hoping to hit the hundredth review mark with this chapter, so we shall see! If it looks like there are a couple of words missing at the end of one of the last paragraphs of the doc, is taking out the works "more then just friends". Don't know why it's happening. It's uploading correctly.

Jasper POV

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Bella pulled me out of the daze I had been in. All morning my thoughts had been drifting to the image of Bella's face when she saw what I had in store for her this weekend. I knew she needed a long weekend off, her work had been keeping her extremely busy and she had been pulling some long hours down in Boston trying to meet some deadlines for her boss. I was very glad when her boss gave her the green light to take all of Friday off. I was hoping she would enjoy the cabin I rented as well as a couple of surprises I had in store on Saturday.

"Just thinking about our trip. I think you will like it. I have a couple of surprises in store." I quickly added, "Don't complain."

Bella immediately groaned at the thought of _any_ surprise. It did not help that our family, particularly Edward and Alice, had loved to inundate her with them. I couldn't help but do one myself. I never got to surprise Alice ever.

Once she agreed not to complain, I kissed her head lightly, had her finish her breakfast and we were off. Bella leaned against me, but as we drove through the town, though her body seemed relaxed, I felt a wave melancholiness about her. At the red light, I turned and asked her if she was alright.

Her response was that she was sad that our rides were coming to an end. I understood completely. Riding the Ducati had become a Bella and Jasper tradition. We had gone everywhere on this bike in the past two months. I would miss our trips down the coast. We had visited everywhere from Bar Harbor, Maine to Newport, Rhode Island on this bike. I already longed for the spring days when I could ride this again with Bella. I could ride this in the stark of winter without her, but it would not be the same so at the end of this trip the bike will be put away till the first spring thaw.

I drove up the highway and as the leaves changed I knew we were coming up to our destination. I pulled off the highway and down a side street, and into a dirt parking lot. It was exactly as I remembered. It was 1947. Peter, Charlotte, and I had gone up to Nova Scotia for the summer months and were heading back down to New York; it was my first time in the Northeast, although it would not be my last. We had taken our car through New England and Peter had gotten a flat and pulled into a lot off the road.

"_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!" Peter muttered under his breath. "Piece of shit vehicle."_

_Charlotte rolled her eyes. "I am telling you Peter, it would be faster to run at this point. The car is not made to be driven like you are driving it. Jasper, calm him down."_

_I had rolled my eyes at those two. This was the third tire he had blown in the past month. Maybe running would be faster. I shrugged turning around so I would not need to face the two of them while they bickered about Peter not buying a spare tire the last time. I knew eventually Peter would have to run and find an open garage to get another tire. It would be a long wait, at least for vampire standards. When I turned however, the scene before me was so beautiful that all thoughts of irritation fled. The mountain range loomed before me, trees bursting in vivid, bright colors. It wasn't just the view; it was the entire scene before me. I closed my eyes, imagining hiking through those woods, hearing the crunch of the leaves, the scent of the maple and pine trees all around me. For once, I felt my bloodlust start to fade away and dissipate. I felt almost human again, just wanting nothing more at that moment then to take in the view and enjoy the moment for what it was. I must have sat there for what seemed like hours, though in reality it was probably less than fifty minutes. _

_When Charlotte and Peter were ready to go, I almost advised them to go on without me. I felt like here, I could forget my bloodlust; forget the pain, the agony, the suffering my victims felt to satisfy my own needs. Almost. Instead, I dutifully turned and joined my companions. I did not want to be alone._

I heard Bella whisper "Wow." I had been so caught up in my own thoughts, I barely registered the fact that she had jumped off the bike. I moved over to her. The view had not changed in sixty years.

"It's beautiful, isn't it? I came here years ago, to this very spot with Peter and Charlotte. They couldn't appreciate the beauty of it, the serenity. I guess my ability just makes me more sensitive to that. It was the one time prior to meeting Alice that I felt whole… untainted. I have always longed to come back to this place". I wanted Bella to understand why this place was so important to me. What a profound moment it had been when I came across it. It gave me hope that I might regain some of my humanity, that I was not a complete monster.

It was then Bella reached for my hand. I took the hand gladly, squeezing it tightly. My heart soared. Bella understood. I was not sure why that meant so much to me at that moment, why I needed her to understand me so desperately. Was it that I wanted her to know that I was not just a monster, that I was man as well?

As she kept her hand in mine, I began to realize, how much I did not want her to let go of it. We stood these in silence, and I enjoyed the tender moment for what it was. This time I was here and I was not alone. I had Bella with me, and I realized that was more than enough.

Bella and I thanked each other for our friendship to one another. I could have sat at this spot for days, just holding her hand in mine, completely satisfied. But I heard Bella's stomach growl slightly and I realized she had not really had anything to eat besides a donut early this morning. I reluctantly let go of her hand, missing the feel of it the moment it left mine.

We boarded the bike again once she agreed that she was human after all and did need to consume calories in order to survive. It was like her hand had awoken me. I was now very aware of Bella behind me on the bike. Her hands were tight around my waist, and even though I was not going fast enough to warrant it, Bella still leaned in against me, her chest against my back, her inner thighs touching my outer ones. I found myself with the beginnings of feelings I thought were long dead once Alice was gone a year and a half ago, never to reawaken again.

We spent the afternoon exploring the cabin that I had rented for the weekend. Bella seemed pleased with the choice; although I could tell she thought I spent too much money. _Well, don't worry Bella. I will not have to worry about money for a long, long, long time. Alice and her predictions took care of that._ We went for a walk through the forest. I smiled as I realized I got to live the dream I had fantasized about sixty years ago, and it lived right up to my expectations. I had been in forests a million times before to hunt, but this trek was just for the pleasure, the beauty of woods, nature at its most remarkable. We were quiet almost the entire hike, but it was the most comfortable I think I had ever been. Bella seemed to intuitively know what I needed at that moment. I was not used to someone knowing what I needed. That was usually my job with everyone else around me.

We rounded back on the trail and headed on back to the cabin on the bike. Bella opened a bottle of wine and made herself dinner and finally retired to the Jacuzzi tub which I am sure she had been thinking about on the hike. When I heard the bathroom door close, I put the book I had been trying to read down and stared at the ceiling, my mind turning to Bella for what seemed like the hundredth time today.

I did not know what to make of this all. Bella was my friend first and foremost. The idea of Bella and me as more, guilt plagued me even at just the thought. Bella had loved Edward for so long, and my brother still loved her tremendously. He was stupid for letting her slip through his hands, although his intentions, as misguided as they were, were pure. The thought of being with Bella… I let my mind wander there for a moment, imagining what it might be like to really touch her, to kiss her, for her to be only mine… well, I knew I could not act on those thoughts. Edward… he was still around and he still loved her with all his being. How could I do that to him, cause him that much misery and agony? At the same time, I knew that Alice would want me to be happy, and I know that she would want me to fall for someone else. What would she say now if she knew that someone was none other than our Bella? Would she approve? Or would she look down on the fact that I was contemplating taking Edwards's one true love?

The voice inside my head stated- _But you know that she would not go back to Edward, even if she could. What if she wanted you?_ If Bella truly showed interest, was I really strong enough to resist? Would I want to resist? These thoughts weighed down my brain as Bella was upstairs. I made myself mentally shake all thoughts of Bella and focus on the book in front of me. It was a book that Carlisle had given me on the Civil War as a gift last Christmas. With everything that had occurred with Alice, I had never gotten around to reading it.

About a half an hour later, I was engrossed in the book. This author had gotten most of his facts correct, and the military notes were fascinating. Carlisle did have good taste when it came to literature. Suddenly, I felt Bella's emotional presence before her physical one. Bella was usually so steady when it came to her emotions, but today, she was out of sorts. Bella felt confusion, surprise, and determination, which was an odd mix. _I wonder what is causing that?_ I continued reading. I knew how personal emotions were, and I did not want Bella to think I was actively trying to read her emotions at the moment. My body went rigid when I felt her next emotion. _Desire?_ I turned and saw Bella looking at me. _Well, that was just not possible. _I then felt a wave of embarrassment shoot through her. Five very strong emotions in less than a minute. _Bella, what are you thinking of?_

I looked up at her concerned. In the two months we had been getting to know each other, Bella's emotions were usually so in check, so consistent. It was disconcerting to see her emotions fluctuate so. Her cheeks were already flushed from whatever she was thinking about before, and upon me looking up, they reddened even more. I tried to act like I had not felt her bevy of emotions with a casual, "Hey Bella, are you going to come and join me?"

She simply nodded. She picked a book from off the bookshelf in the room and plopped herself down next to me in front of the fire. Without intentionally doing so, I found that I was paying more attention to Bella's emotions then the book I was reading. After fifteen minutes, I felt Bella relax completely. She was obviously enjoying the novel she had picked. My mind, however, could no longer focus on battles and a time long past. Instead, I started thinking of the emotions that Bella was feeling on the stairs; my mind particularly focused on one- desire. I contemplated what she who she could be feeling that for. Desire for me? I could not imagine that. I could not be positive of that. Then there was that wave of embarrassment when I caught her looking at me to consider. _She was probably just embarrassed knowing that you felt that emotion. Probably had nothing to do with you._ But what if it had? What if Bella was beginning to feel for me what I was beginning to feel for her? It would explain the emotions certainly.

Then a seed of doubt began to form in my mind. What if she was not over Edward? What if that desire was still for him? What if she still wanted to be with the vampire who considered her his singer? Bella's blood was sweet and incredibly desirable to me, but it did not call to me like it had to Edward. What if after all these years, she still longed for him? Again, my mind repeated the same mantra it had earlier today. _But you know she would not go back to Edward, even if she could. _Did I? Was I really sure of that?

I peered at Bella from over my book. She sighed contently, turning the page. I closed my eyes for a moment. I realized what I adored about Bella was that she did not try to be beautiful, she just was. Humans were so caught up in their own vanity, and if I wanted to be truly honest, so were most vampires. Bella just accepted to who she was.

I tilted back my head against the couch. My mind veered back to the topic at hand. If I made a move, I was not even certain it would be wanted. Edward had been nothing but a good, decent brother. I agonized at the idea of putting him through that much pain, at the idea of his brother betraying him. Alice had been a wonderful wife, and I hated that I could not have been positive that I would have her blessing if I were to try to initiate something. And Bella… well, Bella has been nothing but the truest friend these past couple of months and I do not want to risk losing that over something I am not sure I am not imagining coming from her.

In all my meditations, I had not realized that I had naturally moved closer to Bella and was now gazing at her face. Before I even contemplated turning away, Bella again looked at me with those full eyes.

"You okay?" she asked. There was a slight flush to her face again. I hadn't realized how close I had gotten next to her.

I nodded in response. Simple answer would be the best. "I did not want to interrupt you. You were so enthralled with the story you are reading." I was hoping that she was not going to ask what I had been thinking about. I did not want to lie, but I couldn't very well state what I was truly thinking or feeling.

Luckily, I did not need to. Her face turned into a grin and I couldn't help but immediately return it. She responded by telling me that the story was good and then thanking me for being an amazing _friend_.

I responded by putting my arms around her tiny shoulders. When I gave it a squeeze, I felt happiness come from Bella. _Maybe she is just as confused as me._ _Maybe she does want me, or is beginning to want me. Oh, hell._ "This weekend was my way of saying Thank You for being my friend."

I couldn't help myself. My hands wrapped around her waist, and I pulled her into where I was sitting. I made sure her back was against my chest, I wanted to feel her warmth, and I wanted her to feel my cold. I put my arms around her securely, breathing in her scent. She had the normal notes of Freesia but it was also now mixed with Jasmine. It was lovely and intoxicating all at the same time. I let my lips linger at her right ear as I whispered. "Continue reading."

I saw Bella place the book in front of her face. She seemed distracted. _Did I cause that distraction?_ I was hoping that answer was yes. A few moments later she placed the book down and she stared at the flames in the fireplace contentedly. I could not help but let my thoughts wander. _If Edward ever found out I was in this position with Bella…_ before I could go much further into that line of thought, Bella's voice quietly rang into the air. "Jasper, tell me a story."

The last thing I wanted to do at this moment was tell her a story about Alice and myself. Even though I couldn't fully act on my feelings, it didn't mean I couldn't pretend for an evening that Bella and I were something more than just friends. And then, she continued speaking. "But this time, tell me a story about your life as a human."

I raised my eyes in surprise. She always asked me to talk about Alice. I couldn't help but be pleased and honored that she wanted to hear about my life. Although my human existence was a faded memory, I did have a few moments that I cherished. I began to paint a picture to Bella of my teenage years in Texas. I talked of first kisses, school life, public balls, and my mother and father. As I spoke, Bella seemed to quietly enjoy the story. Usually with the stories of Alice, she would actively participate and ask questions. With my story she stayed quiet as if soaking it all in. I sent Bella waves of calm, in order to try to relax her even further. Even though I did not think it possible, she then sank closer to me, leaving no space in between. Soon thereafter, I felt her fall into a rhythmic sleep. I stayed there for an hour, taking in Bella, enjoying her warmth. Finally, I pulled out from behind her and scooped her up in my arms. I climbed up the stairwell to the bedroom, laying her down in the bed and tucking her in.

"Goodnight, my Bella."

I heard Bella mumble in return, "Night, my Jasper." Before sighing and turning over in her sleep.

I smiled. I was so grateful to have this woman in my life. I turned to the window, ready for the hunt. Tomorrow was a full day.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: I am glad everyone likes this. I wanted to give a shout out to several reviewers who have been so consistent with their reviews… Slam2K, RnWhitlock, Shellebean, Oceanluvr, LunarEclipse1, missmaj… wait you know what? Just thanks to all of you. There are so many who have been so consistent and wonderful with your reviews. Everyone deserves a shout out!**

**Bella's POV**

My eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the light of day. I did not recognize where I was, but wherever I was, I was _comfortable._ I stretched out my legs and my arms, rolling over. Then it hit me. I was in the cabin in the New Hampshire. Jasper must have brought me up here, because the last thing I remembered from last night was falling asleep in his arms. I sighed at the recent memory, relishing in it just for a moment.

The smell of bacon was wafting through the house and my stomach growled, reminding me I was human yet again. I got out of bed, placing my feet gently on the floor. I walked out the door to the top of the stairs. From there, I had a perfect view of Jasper pouring scrambled eggs out of a frying pan onto a plate. I sighed yet again. Jasper looked up and smiled.

"Morning sleepyhead."

"Morning." I replied repressing a yawn. I walked down the stairs and joined Jasper at the table. He had gone all out. Bacon, Eggs, Pancakes, Hash Browns, and cinnamon rolls. "You made all this?"

Jasper nodded. "I got done with hunting early last night, so I figured I would surprise you with a breakfast of champions."

I sat down. "Thank you! This looks wonderful." I eagerly dug in. For someone that could not eat, Jasper did know how to cook. After I shoveled in my third bite of scrambled egg, I slowed down and decided I should make conversation rather than just eating like a pig. "So how was hunting last night?"

He shrugged. "It was good. I found a moose."

I raised my eyebrows. "That does not seem very exciting."

"Bella, have you ever seen a charging moose? Those things are brutal!"

"I can't say I have." I ate a cinnamon roll slowly and stood up placing the plate in the sink. "So, what do we have planned for today?"

Jasper jumped down off the counter where he had been sitting, watching me eat and stood right in front of me, his golden eyes piercing right into mine. "Can't tell you yet."I let out a small breath as he closed the distance between us. We were so close, only inches apart. He then smirked. "But soon." He grabbed my hand and pulled me up the stairs. "You need to get dressed. All I can tell you is to wear some jeans and sneakers."

Well, that was easy. That was all I basically brought. After gently slamming the door in his face, I showered. I spent extra time in the shower, thinking about Jasper again. I thought about last night, his arms around me, his lips that had lingered by my ear, and the feel of his body against mine. I realized I had shampooed my hair three times already. He was very distracting. Just friends, I kept reminding myself as a mantra.

I dressed and headed downstairs. I had found Jasper outside, by the bike. We got in our familiar places on the bike and took off. I braced myself for whatever he had in store.

"Here we are. Surprise number one."

We had pulled up to a horse farm. "Horseback riding?" I sighed in relief, I could handle this.

Jasper nodded. "I thought you might like that. Have you ever been before?"

"In Phoenix. I am not a very experienced rider though."

"Well, I have a tame horse that I lined up for you to ride."

I raised my eyebrows. "And you?"

"I have a more challenging mare to ride."

Jasper walked into the building talking to the woman at the desk. The woman didn't even have a chance. Jasper gave her that winning smile of his and she was soon fawning all over him. She led pointed him to the horses in the barn. He beckoned me to follow.

I walked over to the red barn, just a few paces behind Jasper. He waited at the barn door entrance for me. The smell of hay and manure assaulted my senses, and my eyes adjusted to the dimness of the barn.

The horses started neighing when Jasper had entered. I remembered at that point that animals did not much care for vampires. Jasper walked over to a beautiful black one in particular who seemed upset. Jasper held the mare's head in his hands and began to lovingly stroke its head, whispering softly. "It's okay. I promise I am not going to hurt you. You will be all right. Be a good girl." I could feel the waves of calmness that Jasper was giving off. The mare immediately calmed down and nuzzled as Jasper fed her a sugar cube. "That's my girl. What a good horse."

My heart skipped a beat as I watched the scene unfold. Jasper was so gentle with the horse, so loving. I could tell at that moment how much he cared for the animal in front of him. As if reading my mind he quietly said. "I grew up with horses my entire human life. My father had taught me how to break them in and train them properly. Horses are beautiful creatures but their instincts correctly state that I am dangerous to them. I have to calm them down, make them trust me. Luckily my ability allows for that. It's not often I get the luxury of riding a horse. Alice and the others could never ride; the horses would literally die of fright."

"Wow…. "I let his comments linger for a little bit. "So, which one is my horse?" Jasper walked over the two stalls from where he was. He brought out a tan horse. Again, he started soothing the horse to calm it down. Once Jasper had the horse's trust, he handed me the reins. "This one is yours. Its name is Buttercup. When I arranged for the ride, the woman stated that Buttercup was the most gentle of all the horses."

"And what is your horse's name?"

"Blackjack. She was more recently broken in and has more spirit."

Jasper then assisted me with getting the saddles on the horses, since I did not remember how to perform that task properly. Once we led the horses outside we talked about where we would ride. Jasper advised that there was a trail that was along the property that afforded some nice views of the mountains once we reached a clearing. The owner had provided a map.

"You ready?" He asked.

"As ready as I will ever be." He smiled. I then found Jasper behind me suddenly. His hands went gently around my waist and since my shirt was riding up, his cool skin made contact with mine. I felt a jolt of electricity, which added to the butterflies that were already in my stomach. I instinctively leaned into his touch, wanting more. He paused, and I felt his thumb massage my waist for the briefest of moments. He then squeezed, hoisting me up into the saddle. I let out the breath I had not even been aware I was holding. That whole scene could not have lasted for more than fifteen seconds, but it felt like an eternity.

I looked down at Jasper would was already next to his mare. He hoisted up on the saddle effortlessly. These newfound feelings were so difficult to keep in check. I am now imagining things that are not even there with Jasper.

Our horses took off at a gentle trot into the trail on the woods. For the first few minutes we were quiet, but started to pick up conversation once the barn was out of sight. "Did you sleep well last night, Bella?"

"Yes. That bed was so comfortable. I am sorry you had to carry me up. I did not mean to fall asleep during your story."

"That's okay. It was rather longwinded."

"No! It was beautiful. I know you stated that your memories have faded, but I felt like I was right there, sharing it with you." I pulled my horse up next to his. "I felt like I was a part of it." I wanted to show him how much gratitude I had for him sharing that with me.

"Thank you, Bella."

**Jasper POV**

"Thank you, Bella." I had wanted nothing more at that moment then to feel her lips pressed to mine. But she wasn't filled with desire; it was gratitude at that moment. Unless I was certain that Bella Swan was interested, I had decided that morning that I could not, would not make a move. But if she did express an interest in me, I would make my feelings known and reciprocate. I would have to deal with the consequences of my guilt and my family later.

Bella asked me to tell her another story. I started by telling her a story involving Emmett and how he had decided a few years back that he would make a wonderful actor. "So Emmett decided that he would audition for an off Broadway show in Seattle. Rosalie was totally against it, but Emmett begged and pleaded. Rosalie really could never deny him anything. So she agreed to go with him to the audition. "

"So what happened then?" Bella was eager to hear the rest. "I mean, Emmett is not this world famous actor so something must have gone horribly wrong."

"You're right, of course. The producers hated him, stated that he could not act at all. The only producer who happened to have anything nice to say about him was the lone female. And that was more along the lines of an invitation for a 'private audition' if you catch my drift."

Bella had tears running down her face she was laughing so hard. "Oh, that could not have made Rosalie happy."

I grinned. "No, it did not. Especially, when Emmett did not understand right away what she was prepositioning and agreed to the private audition!"

"Oh no!"

"By the time they got back from Seattle, Emmett was begging me to please calm Rosalie down. I think he really thought he had met his demise."

"Poor Emmett! So what happened?"

"So imagine Emmett on one side of the living room, Rosalie on the other, glaring at each other. Emmett was like a deer in headlights; Rosalie was throwing poisoned darts with the stares she was giving him. I stayed far to the side, there was no way I was getting involved in this. But then here comes Edwar-" I stopped mid sentence. I was not going to bring him up. I barely had in the two months we had been hanging out. "I am sorry Bella."

Bella got really quiet. I felt nothing from her at the moment. "You can say his name, you know. It's not like I am going to break."

I did not want to have this conversation, but I knew it needed to happen. "Can I? Bella, you have not stated his name in almost two months. In fact, you have gone out of your way to avoid the topic of Edward."

She pulled her horse to mine. "I am over him Jasper. I don't need to say his name."

I looked at her. Well, there was no going back with this now. "No." I touched her hand. "You don't want to say his name. There is a difference."

She recoiled her hand from mine, annoyance filling her body. "Jasper, I am over him. That is final."

"No, Bella. You have not even asked about him at all. Since the moment you and I reconnected, I have been waiting for the day when you would ask me where he was, how was he doing. I know you and you are too caring of a person not to ask that."

I felt anger begin to bubble over in Bella. It was the first time I had ever been the direct target her anger was focused at. "Listen Jasper, and listen well. Edward abandoned me. Left me. In over five years he has never once tried to contact me, or send someone out to see how I was doing, or anything. So why should I extend the same courtesy to him, what should I care what he is doing in his afterlife anyways! Fuck him, Jasper. Fuck him and Fuck You for thinking just like Edward that I am a fragile person who would break at the mention of him name. I have survived all these years without him and my life turned out pretty damn fine if I do say so myself. I am happy." Angry tears then began to fall from Bella's eyes.

I chose my words carefully. Even though I knew that Edward's misguided action had good intentions, I was not going to try to make excuses for him or explain away what he did. Bella deserved more than that. "Bella, look to me." She had turned her head towards the forest, ignoring me. I jumped off my horse and walked over to her. When she would not respond, I lifted her off her horse, into my arms. She punched her arms against me in protest. I stated more firmly. "Bella, _listen_ to me."

I sent a wave of calm to her and she gave me a reproachful look. But she muttered. "Fine".

I then placed her down on the ground so she was looking for me. Her eyes were beautiful even as red rimmed as they were at the moment. I could get lost in those eyes, I decided. I was getting sidetracked. "Bella. First of all, I am sorry. I was not trying to state or insinuate that you were fragile or needed protection in any way, shape, or manner. Especially when it comes to Edward. The second thing is that you are right. You are happy and it should not be expected that you are going to look after him, wait for him. I know that you are stronger than that. I have seen it firsthand. All I can say is that I am really, truly, sorry." I wrapped my arms around her in a big hug. I didn't want us to fight, especially over my brother, over him.

I felt Bella eagerly return my hug. She sniffled into my chest. "I am sorry too. I shouldn't have told you to fuck off. I did not mean that Jasper."

I quietly stated. "Yes, you did. But it's okay. I deserved it somewhat." I pressed my lips to the top of her hair, leaving them there a little longer then I should have. I took in her scent again and enjoyed the moment. "So... are we okay?"

Bella pulled away slightly, looking upwards. "Yes, we are okay. The truth is, I am curious about Edward, but I don't really need to know, if that makes sense."

"It does. Do you want to know?"

She nodded. "How close are we to the clearing that has the view?"

"Pretty close, I believe."

"Well, why don't we get back on the horses, I will have lunch when we get to the clearing, and then we can talk."

We got back on the horses and rode up the trail in relative silence. I would tell her everything I knew if she wanted me to, even though the information will be over a year old. When we arrived at the clearing, I set up a blanket and some sandwiches for Bella. We tied up the horses and then sat down.

After Bella took a few bites of her lunch, she looked at me expectantly. There was no anxiety or worry coming from her, just anticipation. I sat across from her. "So what would you like to know first?"

Bella thought for a moment. "I guess let's start off by what is he doing now? Is he happy?"

I pursed my lips. "I'll start with the first question. I can obviously only answer as recently as one year ago. Last time we had heard from him, he was in Europe, England to be specific. He was going to school in Oxford for musical composition. He was content. I wouldn't use the word happy."

She furrowed her brow. "You wouldn't?"

I shook my head. "No." I grabbed her hand from across the blanket. The next words were now going to be very difficult for me to state but she deserved the truth. "He is not happy because he never got over you Bella. He is still as in love with you as the first day he met you."

Her eyes widened. She wasn't happy, but she was surprised. "Really? In five years, he has not gotten over me? But he left me."

"Yes. He had left you, but only because he thought you were safer without us. He thought you were in constant danger with us around." I added. "With me around."

Her voice was flat with the next comment. "So he lied to me. He told me he was leaving because he did not love me anymore and could not be what I needed him to be."

I couldn't believe my brother sometimes. Why would he have not told her the truth? "Apparently so. Edward is… how shall I put this? An idiot?"

She smiled. "Yes. A first class idiot."

I looked at her concerned. Her emotions were in check for the most part. But still. "Do you have any other questions?"

"I do, but I don't want to ask them, and I don't want answers to them. They are not going to change anything. I do wish he was happy now. I hope he finds someone he can feel is his equal, someone that he feels he does not need to protect all the time."

"It took a hundred years to find you."

"Well, hopefully it won't take him that long to find his next Bella. I am not going to go back to him. I don't want to go back to him."

It was my turn to ask a question. "Do you still love him?"

She was quiet for a moment. "A part of me will always love him, just as a part of me will always mourn him. Am I in love with him is probably the better question, and that answer is no. No, I am most definitely not in love with him anymore."


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Okay, this part is short. I was going to make this chapter really long, but I have already had to rewrite this part of the story twice after not liking what I put down. So, since it has already been a week since my last post, I decided to give you this section since I am happy with it and gives some nice Jasper/Bella bonding time. Since I find that I am becoming a review whore, if I get 25 reviews, I will post the next section within three days. It is close to being done, but I really like the next scene and want to do it proper justice. So if I get a good response on this mini-chapter, I will work extra hard over the next two days to get the next part done. Deal??

Disclaimer: It's mine… all mine!! Yeah right. Everything belongs to Stephanie Meyers.

BELLA'S POV

"A part of me will always love him, just as a part of me will always mourn him. Am I in love with him is probably the better question, and that answer is no. No, I am most definitely not in love with him anymore." I stared down at a blade of grass. I did not say what I wanted to add to the end of that statement. _But I think I am beginning to have feelings for you._

How do you tell someone that? How do I even resolve these feelings within myself? It seemed like the past twenty four hours, this was all I was thinking about. Now that my feelings for Jasper have finally come to light, they seem like they are coming on stronger and gaining momentum with every passing moment. _Come on, Bella! There is more to you then mooning over some vampire!!_ I mentally shook myself awake.

I looked up then at Jasper and smiled. "So… this was surprise number one. I must say, I am pleasantly surprised."

I was relieved to see that his smirk had returned and I could tell the conversation revolving around Edward had passed, for now at least. Although I was curious, I really did not want to hear about his particular whereabouts and what he had been up to right after he left. Maybe someday I would be ready to be friends with him, but not now and I definitely did not want him to somehow manage to put a damper on the day. The sun however had other ideas… Jasper and I looked up and noticed that the sun was trying desperately to make an appearance.

"Well, Bella, it looks like we might have to cut the horseback riding short." He smirk had turned into a frown. You could tell he thought that his plans were being spoiled. However, my good mood had returned and I was determined not to have a little sun ruin my day.

"So? We can go back to the cabin. There is a hot tub calling my name after all."

Jasper took my hands and lifted me up. We made quick work of the impromptu picnic and packing up our horses again. I trotted back on Buttercup at an easy pace, with Jasper getting ahead, giving his mare more of a workout. After ten minutes or so, he doubled back and fell into an easy trot beside mine. Soon the barn appeared on the horizon. "You really don't mind heading back?"

I shook my head. "No. The point of this weekend wasn't supposed to be about sightseeing or surprises. For me, it was about spending time with my best friend. How many times am I going to need to tell you that?" I couldn't help but tease him a little.

The owner was there to greet us and take care of the horses. We thanked her profusely and with a glance at the ever strengthening sun, we took off on the bike. In no time, we were back at the cabin. We walked in, he placed the keys on the table while I immediately headed up to the bedroom.

"Where you going?" Jasper asked.

"Bedroom. Changing. Bikini. Hot tub. Remember? Wanna join?" If I had not known better, I could have sworn I heard Jasper groan. I grabbed the suit that the conceriage had picked out. It wasn't the skimpiest bikini I had ever seen, but it did not leave a whole lot to the imagination either. I am just glad I had shaved prior to going on this weekend excursion. I grabbed a towel and walked out to the deck where I noticed that Jasper was already there, in a pair of swim trunks. My previous musings about Jasper's body were dead on. He was very well built underneath his clothes and he had a perfect six pack. A body sculpted like a marble statue. What else did I expect? I gulped suddenly feeling very self concious in my bikini. I quickly pushed aside my feelings of inadequacies and walked to the hot tub.

"Coming in?" Jasper asked almost coyly. Before I had a chance to respond, he grabbed my body, and extending his arms, precariously held me over the hot tub.

"Ahhh!!!" I shouted. "Jasper if you even…"

With a big grin he replied, "If I what? Do this?" and then I found myself get dropped in the hot tub, water flying everywhere.

I quickly sprang to the surface. Sputtering, I responded. "Oh, you are so dead!"

Another smirk crossed Jasper's face as he effortlessly got into the hot tub. "Yes, I am. Obeservant, aren't we?"

I couldn't help but laugh. He continued. "I'm sorry. I just couldn't help it. I knew the look on your face would be priceless. Besides, I never got to surprise Alice that way." His voice turned soft on the last sentence.

Through the water, I squeezed his hand. "I know this is going to probably sound trite, but I wanted to let you know how much I admire the strength you have to get through the loss of her. I know how much she meant to you and I know how much you meant to her. I can only hope that I will someday be able to love someone like that again."

He pulled me back against him like last night and hugged me tightly. "Someday, someone is going to love you with all their heart and they are going to steal you away from me and I will be broken once again."

I leaned back further into him, enjoying his comforting embrace. "No one could steal me away from you. You mean too much to me." _If he only really knew._

We sat in silence then. In the heat of the hot tub, his body temperature almost felt normal. I allowed myself the luxery to pretend that his embrace meant more than it really did, that we were more than just friends.

After sometime had passed, Jasper gently rubbed his hands up and down my arms. Without meaning to, I let a small moan at the touch. I could feel my blood rush throughout my entire body and knew that Jasper felt that wave of embarrassment. He did not make any comment on it however and just stated, "Bella, your body is getting overheated. We should get you out of this. We can continue reading our books for a bit and then you need to get ready for tonight. I hope you don't mind but I took care to make sure you had an outfit for tonight."

I scrunched up my face and mumbled. "Do we have to?" When Jasper's response was helping me up out of the tub, I changed subject. "Tonight? So…What are we doing?"

"I told you there were two surprises this weekend. Emphasis on the word surprise."


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Thank you all for the reviews! As promised, here is next section. For your reference, I could not remember in twilight when Bella's grandparents passed away, so I made up my own timeframe. Again, thank you and please see the A/N at the bottom after the chapter.**

**Bella POV **

After Jasper and I changed, we spent the next couple of hours in front of the fireplace reading. Well, he probably spent the past couple of hours reading. I spent them thinking over the past couple of months, analyzing our time together, seeing if there was any way that he could possibly feel the same way. I thought specifically on the past forty-eight hours. The past several days we had developed a new closeness. Whether consciously or sub-consciously, I found that we were finding ways to be close to one another, whether it was holding hands or a comforting embrace. Those had definitely increased and I know it was not my imagination. Even now, my head was leaning on his shoulder while I turned a page randomly to give the appearance of reading, but I still could not be positive that Jasper felt the same way. Until I knew that Jasper felt the same, I would not react.

I glanced at the clock and noticed it was five. I figured I should probably get ready for whatever new adventure Jasper was going to set us on. As if reading my thoughts, Jasper began to stand up.

"Time to get going, Bella. I can get dinner for you while you get ready if you would like. Unfortunately, jeans are not going to work tonight, so the outfit the concierge picked out is in the closet. Take your time getting ready."

I nodded, and walked upstairs. I took a fairly quick shower. Wrapping a towel around my hair and one around my body, I decided to peak at the closet. This would possibly give me an idea of what we were doing tonight and how I should get ready. I peered in finally and saw a black dress. This concierge enjoyed picking out feminine outfits between the bikini and the dress. The dress was fairly formal looking, so I figured I should do my hair up and put make up on for the occasion. I blew my hair out straight and smeared some light foundation. I applied purple eye shadow with a thick black eyeliner and mascara for a smokey look along with a mauve lipstick that made my lips look fuller for a finishing touch. I pulled out the dress and slipped into it along with the stiletto heels that were there. I thought to myself that it was going to take a herculean effort to navigate myself in those heels.

When I looked in the mirror I was shocked. I think Alice herself would have been proud. The dress cut to a low V in the front, and curved in all the right places. I had to admit, I felt very feminine in this dress and between the outfit, the heels, and the makeup, I looked almost beautiful.

Jasper was putting what looked like two tickets in the front pocket of his button down shirt when he saw me. "Bella." He paused a moment. "You look amazing. Remind me to give that concierge an additional tip."

I laughed, playfully hitting his arm. My eyebrows rose slightly as curiosity took over. "Tickets? To what?"

Jasper nodded. "Can't tell you yet. This is surprise number two. Surprise number one was for me as well as you. But surprise number two, well, this is specifically for you. I hope you don't mind, but I called a cab for us to take to our destination. I did not think you would want to ride on a bike in that dress and heels."

Jasper had dinner all placed out, and I munched here and there while we waited for our ride, with us just doing mindless chitchat.

The cab did arrive shortly. My attempts to ferret out what Jasper had in store were rebuffed with a simple- "We will be there in just a few minutes, Bella. Patience!"

We pulled up to a white building that was rather imposing from the look on the outside. Jasper opened the door to the cab and led me up the walkway. Inside, was a grand foyer. There was a buzz in the air, and men and woman in suits and dresses bustled about, meeting with various acquaintances and networking.  
Jasper silently led me to a set of stairs, away from the crowds, where a gentleman in a black jacket greeted us. "Good Evening!" He stated in a booming voice. "May I have your tickets?"

Jasper handed them to the man, who glanced at them briefly. "Ah... go two more sets of doors down to your left, and there is your private balcony. Thank you for your patronage of the North Woods Theater. Enjoy the show!" Before moving to the couple behind us, he handed me a program.

Again, my eyebrows rose. "Balcony? Private Balcony?"

He shrugged and stated quietly. "It's easier for me then having to sit in the midst of all the other humans. It's a bit more tolerable."

I nodded in understanding. His restraint was already incredible and there was no need to test it further. We walked to our door where he graciously opened it for me. There were two seats in our balcony. I noticed that there were eight private balconies in all, four on our side of the room and four on the other. The chairs were plush and a vibrant red. Our seats afforded a fantastic view of the stage as well. After staring at the people mulling about below for a few moments, I decided to sit next to Jasper who was eying me with an amused look. It was then I glanced down at the program. "An Evening of the music of Steven Sondheim."

I was dumbfounded. I sputtered out. "How... how did you know? I mean, really? I never told Edward or Alice, or anyone in the Cullen family."

My mind flashed back. Every summer, I spent winter vacation with my Grandpa on Renee's side. I loved Grandpa. He was a good man, and regaled me with a million stories of growing up in the nineteen thirties. But more than that, his passion was theater, particularly musicals. Every vacation he would get us tickets to some Broadway show that was playing locally by some theater group. When we were not at the theater, he would play musicals scores in the background while we played Rummy or Scrabble. Steven Sondheim was his favorite and also mine. When he died suddenly of a heart attack, it nearly broke me at the age of thirteen. The only solace I had for years was to play some Sondheim music on my CD player. The music would take me back to him.

"Honestly? In your room you have tickets from a Sondheim show. One time, I caught you looking at them, and I was overcome with this sense of happiness radiating from you. I was guessing that it had some kind of importance to you and when I saw this was playing this weekend up north, well, I could not pass it up."

"It does have a lot of significance. This means so much, you don't know." I kissed his cheek. "My grandfather meant the world to me. Musical theater, especially Sondheim, well it was part of our special bond."

Right then, the lights began to flicker and the remaining patrons who still had not made their way into the theater from the foyer, quickly found their seats. The curtains rose.

A lone man shone in a stark white spotlight.

"Welcome to the North Woods Theater. Tonight we present 'An Evening of the Music of Stephen Sondheim'. As most of you know, Mr. Sondheim has a lifetime of Broadway work which is beloved around the world. Some of his most famous scores include A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, A Little Night Music, Sweeney Todd, Sunday in the Park with George, and Into the Woods. He also wrote the lyrics for West Side Story and Gypsy. There will be numbers played for your enjoyment from all of these musicals. Some we will play just with the Orchestra, but a number will be sung by a variety of the North Woods most talented vocalists. We truly hope you enjoy this evening's performance, as we celebrate a lifetime of achievement of Mr. Stephan Sondheim. And now, without further ado, let us start with A Little Night Music."

The orchestra begins playing a melodious "Send in the Clowns." My eyes closed. As the music flows over me, I can almost smell the tobacco that had lingered on my Grandpa's clothes after he snuck a cigar with his buddies or I can hear his voice regaling the days when he actually lived in New York City and saw the shows live. _"Bella!"_ he would state excitedly. "_Someday I will take you to see a show in New York! And then you can be surrounded by the magic that I was."  
_  
Somewhere between "No One is Alone" from Into the Woods and "Sunday" from Sunday in the Park with George, I noticed that I had entwined my arm with Jasper's and I leaning into him. Tears were falling down my face.

"You okay?" he whispered. "Is this too much?"

I shook my head from side to side. I unwind my arm from his, taking his hand in mine. "No, I'll be fine. This is one of the nicest things any one has ever done for me. You have given me back my grandpa, if just for a night."

He smiled gently. The show went on for almost two hours, although it only seemed like a few minutes to me. Again, the stage dimmed, and the lone man in the spotlight shone once more.

"I hope that you all have enjoyed this evening's performance. Before we close for the night, we have one final performance for you. This song is from West Side Story. It is sung by the incomparable Rachael Lee Evans and Ryan Belser."

A woman and man walk out the middle of the stage, and the orchestra is dimly lit behind them as they sit on a bench placed center stage. The girl is holding his hand and leaning into him on the bench. I realize this is the same position I was currently in with Jasper. Slowly, the man turns to her, looking into like he is gazing right into her soul.  
_  
There's a place for us,  
Somewhere a place for us.  
Peace and quiet and open air  
Wait for us  
Somewhere._

My eyes are transfixed on the stage. It is so pure, so beautiful, and I really believe that they look to be in an all consuming love. The girl begins her response to her suitor.

_There's a time for us,  
Some day a time for us,  
Time together with time spare,  
Time to learn, time to care,  
Some day!  
_  
The couple of the stage then stands, grasping onto one another tightly, looking out at the audience as they sing the chorus together.

_Somewhere.  
We'll find a new way of living,  
We'll find a way of forgiving  
Somewhere . . . _

I feel cool breath against my neck and when the next stanza begins, that velvet voice I know so well rings out quietly so only I can hear him sing. He sings in perfect harmony with the couple on stage.

_There's a place for us,_

I catch my breath.

_A time and place for us._

His voice is beautiful and I feel like at that moment that he is singing not along with the music, but directly to me. My pulse quickens.

_Hold my hand and we're halfway there._

I close my eyes, for some reason scared to look at him, scared to discover if he truly does feel the way I do. More scared to discover if he doesn't.

_Hold my hand and I'll take you there _

I clutch his hand tighter.

_Somehow, _

My resolve is weakening.

_Some day,_

I want to tell him these feelings I've discovered.

_Somewhere!_

The last line he barely whispers, while the woman and man belt the notes. I feel his breath leave my neck and I know that he has returned to his previous position in his seat.

I am paralyzed. I force my eyes to open and will my body to stand to clap and give a standing ovation to the singers on the stage. Once the ovations are completed, I make myself turn to the vampire in front of me. _Please don't have him laughing at my reaction to him. Please._

He is not. Instead, he is looking at me intently. His amber eyes searching mine. He moves a strand of hair that has fallen in front of my face, tucking it behind my ear, his fingers gently grazing my cheek while doing so. My pulse begins to race again as he does this simple action. Jasper stops just a second, lingering there. Tentatively, his fingers then move down slowly along my jaw line, caressing the length of my neck. They pause at my collarbone. I take a deep breath. Never taking his eyes off mine, he then moves his hand to cradle the back of my neck while his other hand snakes around my waist.

I take my left hand and lift it to his face. It is so cold, so unyielding, and yet, it feels so right, as if his cheek was made just for me to touch it.

He puts the lightest pressure on my back, encouraging my body to move closer to his. I willingly comply, my body now dangerously close to being flush to his, and now find that there are mere inches between his lips and mine.

I moisten my lips, parting them slightly in anticipation of his touch. I begin to lean in ever so slightly.

"Bella." he murmurs.

"Jasper." I couldn't wait. All I wanted was his lips on mine, his body touching mine. My ears began to ring.

No wait. That wasn't my ears. It was my cell phone. _No! No! No! Not now! Not this perfect moment. _But it was too late. Jasper heard it too and stepped back, pulling away. I knew frustration was pouring over me and must have been hitting Jasper like a brick.

I fumbled for my purse and picked up the phone. It was Jacob. Fucking Jacob. What did he want? _Bella, be calm.  
_  
"Hello?" my voice dripped of aggrevation.

Unfortunately, his did too. "Bells! Where the fuck have you been? Do you not know how to pick up a damn phone when someone calls you?!?!?" Jacob was furious. But there was a tinge of anxiousness and relief in his voice too.

"Jacob, I am in a theater. I did not hear my phone. What do you want?"

"Bells, I don't know how to say this so I am just going to come out and say it." His voice turned gentle. "Bella, your dad has been shot."

I immediately felt my knees give way and I sat down in my seat. Thirty seconds passed before Jacob continued. "He is going to be okay, but he was shot in the shoulder by some punk and is now in the hospital. He lost a lot of blood."

Anger filled me like I had never felt before. "Jacob! Don't you think it would have been frigging nice to start off with the second sentence first instead of just stating that Charlie has been shot? I just thought my father died! You asshole!"

I felt Jasper's hand on my shoulder and a wave of calm enveloped me. "Jacob, is he really alright? Is he going to be okay?" I did not know what I would do if Charlie died.

"He will be Bells, I promise. He does want to see you though."

Tears ran down my face despite the calmness I felt. "I will catch the next available flight out."

**A/N: Okay, don't kill me! I know from all of the reviews that you want them together but it is not going to happen quite yet. I have this all planned out and trust me, when they do get together, there will be lots of fireworks!!! I did label this "M" after all! I promise, I really will not keep you waiting too much longer. :)**


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: This is some of the same scene as before with a little extra. Thank you all for your great responses on the last chapter! Hope you all like this one as well!

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. But if Stephanie wants to perhaps bestow me with some of the royalty checks, I will be more than happy to take it off her hands.

JASPER POV

I looked over at Bella. Tears fell from her eyes almost silently and she looked at me with a sheepish smile, grabbing my hand and giving it a slight tug. She looked so beautiful just then, so pure. She was the woman I had come to know over these past two months, my Bella.

A couple on stage appeared then and the orchestra started weaving together notes of one of my favorite songs. This night may have been all about Bella, but I could appreciate a beautiful melody when I heard it. I listened to the lyrics and thought upon how much they applied to Bella and I.

I wanted to know if she felt the same way. Even if she didn't, knowing would be better then what this was turning out to be, whatever this was. One minute it feels like our normal friendship, the next, I feel like my long dead heart is going to burst from my chest if I don't tell her what I am feeling.

I found myself leaning in to Bella, my breath on her neck. She tensed slightly. I had to know. My voice found the lyrics to the song as I sang quietly in her ear as truly as I knew how.

_There's a place__ for us,_

I notice her catch her breath at my prescience, at my voice.

_A time and place for us._

I sing directly to her, about us, about my feelings. I feel her blood calling to me as her pulse quickens.

_Hold my hand and we're halfway there._

Bella closes her eyes and desire exudes from her.

_Hold my hand and I'll take you there_

She grabs my hand tighter now.

_Somehow,_

I finally know that she wants me.

_Some day,_

Just like I want her.

_Somewhere!_

The music ends, and I move myself away. I want to see how she reacts to this, what we are, what we could really be. She is taken aback for a moment and does not move. Finally when she does, it is to give the actors a standing ovation shaking slightly as she does so. I join her in the ovation and when it is over, she turns to me.

I gaze into those brown eyes, those wonderful chocolate eyes, and look to make sure the wanting and longing are still there. I know I must appear very serious to her at the moment, and I would be lying if I said I was not.

A wayward strand of hair was in her eyes. My hand reached up to move it, gently touching her cheek while doing so. Her cheek was so  
warm, blood pooling to them at the touch. I paused. Dare I? Do I continue? This was the most intimate moment Bella and I had ever shared.

My fingers then traced her jawbone and ran down her neckline slowly, with myself never taking my eyes off her. Her blood rushed quicker beneath her, and I paused at the hollow of her neck. I wanted to tell her everything about how I felt. I wanted to tell her how quickly I was falling for her, now that opened myself up again to feeling _those_ emotions. I moved my hand to the back of her neck, lightly continuing my ministrations.

She moved her hand up to my face so gently, so sweetly. It's as if we were telling each other everything without saying anything.

My other hand went to the small of her back, pulling her gently to me. I wanted to pull her flush to my body, so I could feel every inch of her petite body, but I remembered where we were and knew that this was not the time or place for that particular moment.

But I would steal a kiss.

Bella subconsciously moistened her lips with the sweet tongue of hers, in anticipation of what was to come. Her lips parted slightly to meet mine.

I want to find the words to tell her how I feel, let her know that I am a gentleman, and will treat her as she should have always been treated. I want to tell her that I will never hurt her, never abandon her, and that I would be hers for as long as she wanted me. Instead, all I could muster was a simple, "Bella."

"Jasper." She responds and that one word is stated with so much longing, I can't wait any longer. Just as I am about to lean in to capture her lips with mine, I hear a cell phone ring. Not just any cell phone.

Bella's.

The beast inside me roars, wanting to claim what is mine. Instead, I step back, knowing the moment is broken and gone. My frustration is amplified by Bella's. At least the beast is contemplated somewhat at the confirmation that she wanted that this as much as I had.

_Soon Bella._ I promised her silently. _Soon we will be together, happy__._

Bella picks up her phone. "Hello?"

I hear Jacob on the other line yelling at her about not picking up the phone. How did I not hear the phone during the concert if it was going off? I must have been really focused on Bella. I mentally chastised myself for letting myself get so distracted that I did not pick up on something that like a cell phone ringing.

Bella gives it right back to Jacob, and I smirk. The dog's temper was quite well known, and if I didn't know that he treated her better than anyone I had ever met and that Bella still loved him like a brother, he would feel my wrath.

Bella's whole being then fills with utter grief and despair. I can tell her legs are about to give way as she slinks back down into her seat. What the hell is going on? I then hear Jacob mention something about her dad being shot and okay but losing a lot of blood.

The same anger I was the subject of earlier today was amplified by one hundred, radiated from the woman in front of me. That she yelled at Jacob would be putting it mildly. She was pissed off that he mislead her to think that her dad was gone. I place my hand on her shoulder, sending a wave of calm to help her. While it seemed that Jacob may have mistakenly misled her, he did not deserve the wrath that I could feel she would unleash upon him.

Her anger dissipated at my touch, and Bella finishes up the conversation quickly with a promise to fly out and call him back with flight information so he can pick her up.

I pull Bella up from the chair and wrap her into a tight hug. The remaining anger leaves her completely as more sadness unfolds within her. Heavy tears pour from her tiny frame, and I just shhh her and console her, letting her feel and absorb the shock of it all.

"It will all be okay, Bella, I promise. Jacob stated that he was going to be fine. The boy may relay news poorly, but from everything you have ever told me of Jacob Black, he would never lie to you to comfort you. He always tells the truth. So trust when he says that your father _will_ be fine. Come on, the cab should be here waiting to pick us back. Okay?" I lift up her chin with my index finger and she nods in agreement, her eyes swollen from crying.

I let her place her weight on my body and we navigate the stairwell quickly but quietly, exiting the foyer into the night air. As expected, the cab was waiting for us, and Bella climbed in the backseat. She immediately wrapped her arms around me again, pressing her head into my shoulder.

Once in the safety of the taxi, she began to sob again. I relaxed her by running my hand soothingly through her hair, letting her get out the remaining tears that had not been shed. After a few minutes her cries subsided and she just rested, her head buried in my chest. I could tell that fatigue from this whole evening was beginning to wear on her.

Unfortunately, I knew she could rest yet. We needed to get her back home. "When we get back to the cabin, we will have you change into something much warmer, and head back to your apartment right away. While you are changing, I can make the flight arrangements for you to head out on the next available flight." I paused for a moment. "Would you like me to go with you?"

I could tell that Bella was thinking for a moment before looking up at me. Cautiously she stated, "While I would like you to go, I don't know that it would be the best idea. I will mostly be with Charlie taking care of him and when I am not with him, I would like to see Jacob… even though he is an idiot."

I couldn't help but chuckle at that last statement.

"You are not upset with that are you?" Worry suddenly filled her again.

"Upset?" I smiled. "No Bella, why on earth would I be upset?"

"I just thought...." She trailed off, and then found her voice again. "Well… oh, I don't know."

"No, you are going to have your hands full while you are there. I would go in a human heartbeat if you thought it would help you get through it, but it's not like I can really be around you most of the time. Besides, I can keep myself busy. Promise you will call me if you need anything though, okay?"

Bella nodded and we spent the rest of the cab ride in silence.

As soon as Bella determined that she wanted to go to Forks alone to tend to her father, I knew what my own next steps needed to be. I had my own family I needed to deal with. It had been too long since I had seen Carlisle and the others.

I kissed Bella on the head as the cab moved excruciatingly slow towards our destination.

Yes, it was time we both went home.


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: thanks! I am almost at the 200 mark for reviews. That is awesome. I should have the next chapter up soon, but the more reviews I get, the quicker I write. I was going to try to post this chapter last night, but I got caught up in American Idol.

Disclaimer: Own nothing of twilight except so copies of the movie and the books I purchased.

I let out a deep breath as I leaned my neck against the headrest. I stared out the airplanes window, the sun cresting over the horizon, the dawning of a new day. Had I really been up all night? I yawned then, proof I had been. What a wild, crazy 48 hours this had been for me, the past eight of them truly being a blurb. As promised, Jasper flew home on the Ducati, making incredible time for me. He had arranged for me to be on the 6:00am flight out of Logan, which had not left me much time to get ready and pack up. He drove my SUV to the airport with me and carried in my bags. Pretty much the entire ride down into Boston, I was quiet, thinking about my dad. It wasn't until I had my tickets in my hands that I think it hit me that Jasper really was not coming with me. At that point, it struck me that we had not spent more than several days apart since I caught up with him in Forks. I let my mind wander to that moment.

_I turned from the desk where I picked up my ticket to look at Jasper. I cared for him so incredibly much and even though I knew it was best to do this alone, I couldn't picture him not going with me. A voice then rang out over the speaker. _

"_United Flight 828 now boarding."_

_He looked at me. "You better get going. That's your flight."_

"_I'm going to miss you so much."_

"_I'll miss you too, Bella."_

_My heart felt a pang at the thought of being separated from him. We were so close to what we wanted to be, what we truly were. I wanted to tell him everything I felt about him, how much his friendship and companionship meant to me, how much I wanted him to be with me and only me. But now was not the time. _

"_Can I call you?"_

_Jasper then wrapped his arms around me tightly in a fierce hug. "Anytime, Bella. Anytime. I will be waiting and looking forward to hearing your voice. Don't let those Forks folks keep you away too long." The next part he whispered into my hair so softly, I almost did not catch it. "Come back to me."_

_Tears began to softly flow down my cheeks. "I will. I promise."_

_He placed a lingering kiss on the top of my head as we stood there for what seemed like forever, holding each other, giving each other unspoken promises of what was to occur when I returned._

_And with that, he had let me go and I turned to board my flight._

I missed him already and it had not even been a half an hour. The plane had entered the air and the seat belt sign finally turned off. I got out my laptop. Thank goodness for Wi-Fi on planes now. I knew if I did not keep myself busy I would think of Charlie and I did not want to do that so I continued thinking of Jasper. He was so fantastic this weekend. The thought he had put into it, making it special for me was mind blowing. It was sweet without being too over the top. He had really thought about what I would like. I knew that I wanted to return the favor and show him how much I cared.

I put that thought as my inspiration for the next upcoming three hours, pouring over possible ideas on what I could do that would be really special for him. It had to be sweet, thought out, and thoroughly Jasper. Finally, after two hours of searching, I came across something so perfect for him that I knew I could not pass it up. It would take some work over the next couple of weeks to pull it off, but it would be a great distraction when I started to feel lonely or began to get depressed over my father while in Washington. For the first time all night, since our almost kiss, I felt excitement surge through me. Strangely enough, this also made me feel like everything was going to be okay with my father.

Before I knew it, the attendant was advising that I would need to put away my laptop and buckle up. I pushed aside my ideas for now, but knew I would return to them soon. I disembarked the plane, and as I walked past the gate, I saw my 6 foot 7 inch friend towering above everyone else. As mad as I had been earlier at him, I couldn't help but smile and run over to him, squeezing him as tightly as I could. "Jake! I missed you!"

I could feel Jake return the hug with equal fervor. "Umm… Bells, not that this isn't terrific, but I thought you were mad at me?"

I pulled away smiling. "Well, you are an absolute moron, but I missed you too much to hold a grudge for long."

"I am sorry, you know. That was an idiotic thing." He looked over at the petite girl next to him. "Trust me, Audrey reminded me that I was an ass about fifty times in the past eight hours."

The petite girl hit him again. "Well, you are! Really, Bella, you are letting him off way too easy."

I gave her a big hug. I really liked Audrey and she knew how to put Jacob in his place. "That is what I have you for. I missed both of you so much."

She looked at me critically. "Bella, you look really good. Boston must really be agreeing with you. You look all lit up inside."

Jacob nodded. "It's like you are finally whole again."

I smiled. I knew that part of that had to do with a certain blond vampire back in Boston. "I feel whole again. Guys, as much as I really want to continue the reunion, I am _really_ anxious to see Charlie. How is he doing?"

Jacob smiled as we walked to baggage claims. "He is still drugged up a little, but awake. He is really going to be just fine, Bella. I am really sorry about being stupid."

"I know. I am just anxious to see him is all."

We made quick time of finding my luggage and headed off straight to the hospital. With promises that they would stick around till I was ready to go, I walked up nervously to the room I knew he was in. I was not sure why I was so nervous, after all hospitals and myself used to synonymous in my teenage years. I mean, I practically had my own reserved space.

When I entered the room, I knew why. There was my father asleep on the bed, with an IV and a morphine drip hooked up to him. I rushed to his side, my eyes welling up for the millionth time in the past day and stood next to him. He looked so fragile, so mortal. The thought that I could have lost him, terrified me. I saw Charlie's eyes start to flutter open. He smiled weakly. "Bella?"

"Yes, dad. I'm here. Jacob told me what happened. I took the first flight out. How are you?"

"Just peachy."

I couldn't help but snicker. "No, really dad. Are you okay?"

"Nothing a little time won't fix. I won't be able to fish for a while-" he made a slight face at that, "But I will be good as new before you know it."

"Well, dad, this was a bit of an extreme move if you wanted to take some time off and have your daughter come visit."

We made idle chit chat but I could tell that the morphine was kicking in again. When he started drifting off to sleep, I promised I would return that night and found Jacob in the hospital café.

"Ready?" he asked.

I confirmed I was and advised I just wanted to go back to the house. It was now a little past 2pm here, and my lack of sleep was catching up to me quickly. We pulled up to the driveway. He stated that he was going to hang out here for the next couple of days while I was back until Charlie came back to the house. We entered the front door, putting my bags directly on the inside.

Jacob sniffed the air. "Something smells fragrant."

We walked into the kitchen and I smiled. Just like my first day at the apartment, a bouquet of bright pink Hibiscus's mixed with white Magnolia's sat on the kitchen table. I knew what I would see when I opened the card and I could not hide my pleasure. Jasper amazed me again and again with his thoughtfulness. I went for the card, but unfortunately, Jacob was bigger and quicker. Damn werewolf reflexes. _Fuck._ He read the card.

_Bella-_

_These are to remind you of home. Take good care of your father as I know you will and I will see you soon. Remember, I am only a call away._

_Jasper_

"Bells has an admirer! Jasper….Why does that name sound so familiar to me? Jasper…." His eyes shot up in recognition and then they darkened. "Bella, didn't Edward have a brother named Jasper?"

I could only mutter, "Yes." I knew my face gave me away.

"What is going on?"

I began to grown indignant. "Nothing is going on! Besides, what does it matter to you?"

"I am a werewolf. I am sworn to protect you from that kind. Why are you hanging out with the Cullens again? Did you follow them out there??" His eyes darkened more. "Is that bastard Edward there?"

"No, the Cullens are not in New England, and NO, Edward is definitely not there. The only person who is there that I ran into was Jasper. He has not even talked to anyone in the family in over a year."

"I have a hard time believing that. What about Alice, his girlfriend?"

I lowered my eyes to the kitchen floor. "She is gone. She died over a year and a half ago. I ran into Jasper right before I left forks this summer. He happened to be visiting the old home to remember Alice. He actually lives within forty minutes of where I do." The floor needed to be mopped badly. Quietly I stated, "He is my friend."

Jacob was frustrated, but he still pulled me into a hug. "That is bullshit, Bells. I saw your face when you saw those flowers. I recognize that look."

"What look?"

"You know what look. You are in fucking love with the leech."

I pulled away harshly. "What?!?!? I am not in love with Jasper."

He did not back down. "I would bet my life on it. You are either a) in love with him or b) in the process of falling in love with him."

There was a lot more that needed to me said on this subject between Jacob and me and I knew it would be, but I stood there dumbfounded, unable to get any words out. He was right.

I was falling in love with Jasper Whitlock.

I suddenly realized it was like an avalanche was crashing towards me, getting bigger and bigger till it consumed everything around it, going faster and faster. I was falling fast and hard and there was nothing I could do about it but hope that I did not get pulled under by the weight of it all.


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: 100 people marked my story as a favorite. That is so great! Here is the next chapter. Hope you all enjoy this chapter and remember reviewing makes me type faster!!

Jasper's POV:

I looked at my own plane ticket. I had not told Bella he was going to see the Cullen's. She had enough to worry about, and when she had been packing upstairs, I arranged for myself to have a flight out later that afternoon to Prince Rupert, British Columbia. In truth, I was looking forward to finally seeing Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, and Rosalie again. I had missed my family over this past year and few months, and wanted to be reunited with them. I looked forward to Carlisle's rational demeanor, Esme's motherly affection, Emmett's straightforwardness, and even Rosalie's pretentiousness.

I had arranged for a car to be waiting at the airport upon his arrival in Canada. Sure enough, a black Honda CRV was waiting for me, and sunshine was one thing I did not need to worry about, as it was nighttime when I finally did arrive. I drove through the familiar streets of Prince Rupert, the fishing town quiet at this time of night. However, when I reached the winding driveway of the Cullens on the abandoned road, I was not surprised to see the house lit up.

I pulled in slowly, preparing myself for all the emotions I was going to be hit with. I left rather abruptly over a year ago and fully expected to be hit with disappointment, anger, and even sadness. It would be what I deserved.

Instead, the first one I saw was Emmett come running out of the house. Emmett ran over to the car, ripping the door wide open, yelling for Rosalie. He yanked me out, wrapping me in a manly hug. Rosalie was right next to him at this point, along with Carlisle and Esme. Rosalie shoved her husband out of the way, giving him a dirty look in the process and then she hugged me as well and kissed my cheek. When she was done, Carlisle shook my hand gladly, and when I saw Esme, I wrapped my arms around her tightly, knowing that my leaving impacted her the most. "I'm sorry." I stated to her.

She smiled up at me. "It's alright. You are here now, that is all that matters."

I couldn't believe the emotions I was feeling. There was no anger or resentment, just genuine happiness at my return. I felt complete familial love radiating from my family. It was good to be home. The rest of the evening I spent catching up on their whereabouts. Carlisle was still working at the local hospital and he enjoyed working with the people there, although the hospital was not all that busy. Esme had decided that she wanted to keep busy and opened her own design firm. She traveled down to Vancouver a lot to visit clientle. Rosalie handled the finances, and as I expected, she was a shrewd business partner. Emmett had decided to enroll in the local community college and take some literature courses to keep him occupied. Overall, they were very content and satisfied.

When they asked about myself, I told them most of the truth. I told them that I had moved to Maine, but left to mourn and visit places that Alice and I went. I apologized again for leaving so quickly. I explained how difficult it was to be dealing with my own sorrow at that point, never mind having four other people radiating the same levels of grief I was. I explained that over time, I was able to heal, and remember Alice for the special vampire she was, and how she made me bring back a bit of my humanity again.

Carlisle was the first one to comment when I was done giving my brief history. "We were all very worried for you, Jasper. We loved Alice very much, and it was almost impossible for us to hide our own grief. We were never angry that you left; in fact, we understood why you needed to do so completely. It was sudden how you were gone one morning, but I think I speak for all of us that we were expecting it to happen. I am glad that you have found the peace you were looking for inside."

There was a momentary lull in the conversation, so I asked the question I had been longing to ask since I arrived. "How is Edward? Where is he?"

Esme was the first to respond. "Edward is the same as usual. Not much has changed since you left a year ago. He has completely immersed himself in his music as a diversion to Bella, and while he seems content, he is not happy. He will be returning in a month and a half for the holiday break. I am hoping that being with the family will lift his spirits a bit. It will be the first time we have seen him since..." she trailed off.

"It's okay." I knew what she was going to say. She was going to finish with- since he came back for the memorial we threw in Alice's memory. Alice's passing had thrown Edward into even deeper sorrow as she was his closest family member besides Carlisle. It had been impossible at that time for me to be around Edward for more than a few minutes here and there. Edward's feelings were about five times worse than any of the other family members, and tossed my own despair into greater depths.

At the time, I had tried to ease some of Edward's emotional baggage, but I found it impossible to achieve that inner calm that I so desperately sought and could not find until recently. Until I met up with Bella again, that is.

That thought brought me back to the reason I returned. I heard Emmett mention that he wanted to go hunting and wanted to know if we could go as a family. I hated disappointing him, but hunting would need to wait.

"Actually Emmett, I have something that I would like to speak to Carlisle about in private. Why don't the rest of you go and I promise, I'll be around for a few days so we can go hunting for some grizzly."

"Sure, Bro. Whatever you want." Emmett replied. With the exception of Carlisle, the rest looked at me questioningly but left out the door towards the expansive woods without another word.

Once we were alone and the others could no longer be heard, Carlisle then moved next to me on the couch. I had always had tremendous respect and love for him ever since the day I met him. Alice and the others had always viewed him as a father, but I had always viewed Carlisle more in the role of friend. I was oldest next to him and my sordid history and abilities had naturally led me to be more serious and mature then the others, excluding Esme. I did not need the father figure that the others clung to. I knew that Carlisle knew this and in turn, he always acted fairly and treated me as if I was on equal footing with him, which I was very grateful for.

"What's on your mind, Jasper?"

I cut right to the chase. "It's complicated Carlisle. It's about Edward." This was not going to be an easy conversation. Edward was by all rights closest to Carlisle, and their love for each other was vast. I knew that Carlisle was who knew Edward best, but could still manage to look at this situation objectively which I needed.

I continued. "The last place I visited when I was mourning Alice was Forks. While I was there, I ran into Bella."

Carlisle furrowed his brow in thought at the name of his son's lost love. "Continue."

"She was preparing to leave Forks and had decided to visit our old house one last time. Imagine my surprise when I saw her there again. I had figured she would stay away. Bella and I talked and I let her into the house. She was there for the same reason I was. To move on with her life."

"How was she?"

"She is good, which is why I came to see all of you. Carlisle, I think it is important to note that Bella is not the same Bella that Edward fell in love with. He fell in love with a girl who was young, naïve, and innocent. The Bella of today is jaded, strong, independent, and most importantly, happy. It took her years to get over Edward, but she did. She doesn't love him anymore, hasn't for a while. That connection is gone, which I know when Edward finds out will devastate him."

I could tell he was musing over the words I stated. I also knew that I was skirting around what I came here to say. Apparently, Carlisle could as well, because he just responded with a "There is more."

I nodded. "Bella was preparing to move to New England for a job offer in Boston in publishing when she showed up to the house. She was leaving in three days."

I noticed Carlisle beginning to connect the dots. "You stated that you now live in Maine, not all that far away."

"Exactly. When I had mentioned in passing I lived close to her, she asked if we could be friends. At that point, I was still filled with sorrow, but longed for the connection of someone, anyone. The family had been so filled with grief and pity I could not stay here and I did not trust myself to visit Peter or Charlotte. Bella was just there. While she was sad at Alice's passing, she was overall content and her friendship would provide me with a much needed distraction to help myself mourn healthily over Alice. So when I returned to Maine a few days later, we struck up a friendship."

I paused again. Carlisle was content and his emotions were not relaying anything. "We have been friends for over two and a half months now. The reason I am here is that I realized that my feelings for her run much deeper then friendship, Carlisle. I never thought they would develop like that, especially after Alice. She is an amazing woman."

Carlisle nodded and quietly asked, "And how does she feel about you?"

"Although I have not acted on my feelings, I am almost certain she feels the same for me. And that is where the problem lies. I love Edward like a brother, Carlisle. I know that this is going to crush him and I know he won't understand that Bella is different. He will be convinced that I am somehow manipulating her emotions to make her feel this way. While I do not want to cause this pain to Edward, I don't think I can simply stay away and not act on my feelings. I understand if I need to stay away from the family from now on. I just ask that you give me a few days to say my goodbyes."

I stopped at that, letting the enormousness of what I just stated wash over him. Carlisle looked up and ran a hand through his hair, and although I did not think it possible, he looked tired. "You are right, Jasper. This will crush him. It will eat him alive." He paused again. "But you are not saying goodbye to this family. Even though you may have been our last addition, you are not the least, and we have already had one loss, I will not tolerate one more. It looks like Bella was destined to be in this family one way or another."

Carlisle stood up and stared out the window. "The only way for Edward to recover from this is by being brutally honest with him. It will destroy him at first, but eventually he will realize that he loves Bella enough to let her be happy. This will not be easy on you or her, I'm afraid."

"You are not angry or even disappointed." I was amazed. He just had acceptance.

"Jasper, if there is one thing I have learned in over four hundred years is that the heart wants what the heart wants. There is no stopping it if two people feel the same way towards one another. I guess I did always figure that Edward would find his way back to Bella, but we all knew that when he left he might have done damage that was irreparable when he finally came to his senses."

He twisted to look at me before continuing. "Our family will never turn you or Bella away. You are always welcome here. When you do decide to finally announce your feelings to her, and if she returns them as you suspect she will, I do request that you let Edward know sooner than later. It is only fair to him and he needs to know this is something you were not trying to hide from him. Until then, I will keep this from Edward as best I can for the sake of all of you."

I walked over to Carlisle, embracing him, realizing that he really was more like a father to me then I had ever realized.

A/N: More Jasper POV to come with the Cullens!! I missed them, but I need to return back to Bella in Forks first!


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: Well, since there was such a fantastic response to the last chapter, I decided to post the next one already!

So we are back to a little Bella and Jacob. Shorter chapter, I just missed Jacob and wanted some Bella/Jacob interaction. Although some of you don't think so, Jacob is really a nice guy; he is dork a lot of times, but a true friend to Bella. It seemed like everyone enjoyed the Jasper/Carlisle interaction. I couldn't wait to write that chapter when I thought it up about a month ago (I know, in my head I am so much further with this story). Just a few more chapters where Jasper/Bella are apart, guys. Jasper needs some time with the Cullens and Bella needs some time with her dad and then back to New England!!

**Bella POV**

Three days had passed by since my arrival back home. I felt so lucky that my boss was extremely understanding and let me take a leave of absence to take care of my father after only two months of working there. I assured my boss it would only be two weeks, but she told me to take the time I needed. Charlie was doing much better, I visited him every day in the hospital and he was off the morphine finally, which made him much more alert. The doctor stated that I should be able to take him home from the hospital tomorrow if all the final tests come back clear.

I couldn't help but be in a fantastic mood when Jacob stopped by. "Hi Bells! Dad told me the news that Charlie will probably be given the okay to come home?"

I nodded happily. "Yep! As used to hospitals as I am, I am very relieved that he is going to be out of there soon."

Jacob looked around the kitchen. I could see him gawking at the amount of food that I had bought from the grocery store that morning. "Are you having the Pack over?"

Smiling, I hit him on the arm. "Funny. No, I decided that since I only have a couple of weeks out here, I am going to prepare a lot of meals so Charlie will only have to reheat. He won't have use of that arm for a while, and anything I can do to make his life easier, I will."

"You are such a good daughter. So… you asked me to come here, so here I am. What can I be of service with?" I put Jacob to work cutting some vegetables for chowder I was making my father while I prepared some chicken. It had been three days since Jacob and I last spoke face to face, he had left shortly after he saw the flowers and realized who they were from. It was three days since I realized I was falling head over heels in love with Jasper Whitlock.

Today was Jacobs first day off since I saw him this past weekend, and he had told me that I had him for the full day, which I was grateful for. However, I knew I was going to have to broach the subject of one vampire soon or else he would.

We made idle chitchat for a while, when Jacob finally placed his knife down looking at me exasperated. "Okay Bells. I tried. I really tried okay? I can't let this go. What is going on with you and the vampire?"

I groaned as I put down my knife as well. "I knew I couldn't hold you off forever. Jacob, nothing at the moment is going on with Jasper and I. Not that it is really any of your business, but I know you will not let this go, so I am going to state it. No, I do not have feelings for Edward anymore, which you know damn well. But yes, I have feelings for Jasper." Jacob looked like his eyes were going to pop right from their sockets and I could feel him urging himself calming himself down.

I put my hand on his arm in a soothing gesture. "Listen, I know that you are only worried about me and my safety. Please trust my judgment when I say I am sure that he will never hurt me. I think he feels the same way about me that I feel about him, in fact, I'm almost positive of it. "

Jacob took a deep breath and resumed cutting vegetables at a quick pace. After a few minutes he spoke again, this time more calmly.

"But Bells, how do you know he won't hurt you? And I am not only talking about the physical blood sucking aspect. This is a Cullen. His leech of a brother left you in the woods, alone after breaking your heart. None of his family, including Jasper, stuck around to make sure you were okay back then. What makes him any better?"

I could see the concern that lined his face. I wanted to set his mind at ease. "How about I start with the physical?" I saw Jacob move his head in agreement. "Jasper now has incredible control over his bloodlust. It's like how I know you can control yourself when get upset and need to calm yourself. Emily got hurt with Sam when he wasn't careful. But I knew that when you first changed to a werewolf, you would never hurt me, never lose control. My gut feeling told me about you that just as my gut feeling is telling me that about Jasper now. I trust him implicitly. Does that make sense?"

Jacob reluctantly nodded. I continued speaking. "And as to your other concern, yes, Edward left me a disaster. Yes, you had to help pick up the pieces, which I will never be able to thank you enough for. No, Jasper did not stick around to check on me. However, the one piece that you are missing is that Jasper and the others had thought that Edward had told me the truth in his leaving. Edward had left because he was concerned he couldn't protect me and that he, his family, and vampires in general were a danger to me."

Jacob muttered under his breath. "Well, at least the bastard was right about something."

After giving him a very cold stare he mustered an "I'm sorry." And I continued.

"As I was saying… Instead, idiot Edward decided to tell me that he did not love me, which made his parting a million times worse in my eyes at the time. Jacob… Jasper understands me. For the first time in forever, I feel like I am on equal footing with someone, intellectually, and emotionally. I know that Jasper would never pull what Edward did. I am asking as your friend that you don't go off the deep end and that support me in whatever I do regarding these feelings. Please?" I looked at him with pleading eyes.

Jacob rolled his eyes, but then wrapped me in a hug. "Bells, I still do not have to like it and if you get involved with him, I will be calling all the time checking to make sure you are okay. If you ever, ever, EVER need me, I will have the Pack across the country so fast that vampire will not know what hit him. Is that okay?"

I grinned, knowing that this was Jacob giving in. It was easier than I thought. "More than okay. I love you, Jake."

"Love you too, Bells."

We continued cooking for another hour when an idea struck me. "Jacob..." I stated in a sing songy voice.

He groaned. "I know that voice. Whatever it is can't be good. What do you want?"

I looked at him innocently. "What do you mean? I don't want anything."

"I am calling bullshit again Bella. I have known you for too long. What is it?"

I paused, relishing in Jacobs agony at the unknown. For him, he will think that this is so awful and that that was only about to get worse. "So… I have this idea that I could use your help on…"

After I explained the idea I got on the plane for Jasper and how he could help, he recoiled in horror. "Oh no, Bells. No! I will do anything for you. Anything! I will walk through fire; I would cross a never ending desert if it meant helping you. But not this."

"Come on, Jacob! I am only here for two weeks! How bad can it be? Really?"

"No, Bells. That is my final answer."

"Do I have to pull the card?"

Jacob looked at me wearily. "What card?"

It was dirty play and I knew it, but I did it anyways. "You made me think my father was dead on the phone. I think that earns some leverage."

He groaned. I knew I hit him where it hurts. "You are only here for two weeks, right? If I do this, you can never mention how I fucked up that phone call again, understand? No more bringing it up. I really do feel awful about it."

I felt a bit guilty because I knew he was so sincere. I stuck out my hand. "I'm sorry, Jake. I promise I will never bring that up again even if you don't do this for me. Shake on it?"

He shook my hand and I heard him groan loudly again. "What am I getting myself into?"

I patted him on the back. "Awww… Jake. It's not _that _bad."


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: Hey everyone! I have been very busy but I want to keep doing my best with updating at least once or twice a week for you! So while the chapters may not be the longest, they will be coming regularly which is important to me. I _think_ that there are going to be two more Bella Forks chapters and two more Jasper Canada chapters and then we go back to New England. That could change if I combine some things or may be a chapter longer if I get the time to write more. Enjoy the below. And as always, I do not own twilight. Wish I did!! Thanks for all the reviews, and please keep them coming as they really make my day!

**Jasper's POV**

Three days had passed since I arrived back with the family. Emmett and I were going to be leaving for our grizzly hunt in the next few hours as promised. I was looking forward to some time alone with him. With Emmett I could just be and he would accept it and move on. If it wasn't for the fact that he was the worst in the family at keeping thoughts from Edward, I would have liked to have a conversation with him about Bella. Emmett always gave straightforward advice, something I could use right about now.

I stood in the kitchen with Rosalie just talking about the designing business when I felt my pocket buzz. The phone vibrated softly then and I glanced at it briefly for appearance's sake. I knew without even looking it would be Bella.

As much as I wanted to answer the phone, Rosalie was standing across the room from me and I knew Bella was the last person she was expecting me to be talking to. Rosalie's eyebrow arched highly as I put the phone casually back in my pocket.

"Who was that?"

I danced around the question. "It was nothing important."

"That's not what I asked, Jasper." I could now feel her curiosity peaking. She could tell I was hiding something.

"I know." And I left it at that.

Rosalie, being typical Rosalie, was not happy with that answer. "What are you hiding, Jasper? First you want to speak to Carlisle in private after randomly showing up after a year. Now you are hiding phone calls from me?"

"It's just private, Rose. Can't you respect that?" Even though I had no need to, I sighed loudly. I was not ready for the rest of the family to know. If they knew, and Edward came back early, they would have to hide their thoughts which would immediately make Edward suspicious. It made her pause, if only for a moment. Then she stated huffily. "Fine. Don't tell me."

Emmett walked into the room then. Rose brushed by him, grabbing his hand. "Come on, Emmett. I need to get out of here." Emmett rolled his eyes, used to her dramatics as she pulled him out the door. I do not know how he did it. I loved Rose like a sister, but she was so demanding at times. She was lucky that Emmett was as laid back as he was. She walked out to the garage and I could hear her car peel out of the driveway.

Carlisle and Esme were gone for the day, so that left me in house alone. I felt bad keeping the call from her, but Rose would not understand. Rose already resented Bella for the opportunities that she had being human, and never understood Bella's willingness to want to change into a vampire so easily. _Would she even want to change into a vampire for me?_ _She has a life now and a career. Would she give that all up for me?_ I decided that it was much too soon to go down that particular path. At this point I would be happy with just her in my arms.

I pulled the phone out of my pocket and dialed Bella's number.

"Hello?" her soft voice answered, sounding hopeful.

"Hi Bella."

"Jasper!" I smiled at the excitement that rang in her voice. I missed that voice. "How are you?"

"Wonderful now that I am speaking to you. So how is it going there? How is your father?"

"Charlie is doing so much better! I am actually picking him up early this afternoon to take care of him at home."

"Bella, that's wonderful news. When do you think that you will be back?"

"Well, about another week and a half I will stay here, make sure my dad is all set before leaving. How are you? How is New England?"

I paused for a moment. In the rush of Bella's leaving, I had not mentioned that I was going to visit Carlisle and them. I debated with myself for a moment on whether to have her believe I was in New England or tell her the truth. I did not want her to mistake that I was choosing the Cullen's over her. I quickly decided to tell her the truth, I wanted no secrets to be between Bella and me and was ashamed that even for a moment I thought about deceiving her.

"I'm actually not in New England, Bella. I decided that I wanted to see the Cullen's again. I figured that I would visit them at the same time you were in Forks… Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, and Rosalie are here." I felt that I still needed to assure her that Edward was not.

The other end of the phone was silent with the exception of Bella's steady breathing. After a minute she spoke. "How are they?"

"They are good." I filled her in on what they were doing in their lives, how easy it was to be around them again, and how there wasn't the everyday struggle there had been initially after Alice. I must have talked for well over a half an hour straight, content listening to Bella respond with the occasional "really?" or "hmmmm". Just knowing she was on the other side of that phone made my heart long to be near her.

When I completed updating her on the family she asked, "Do they know that you have seen me?"

"Carlisle does. The others do not. Is that alright?"

"Jasper, if you think that our..." pause. "our…" another pause. "Our… friendship should be secret for now, that's okay. I trust your instincts completely and if you don't think it is the right time to tell them, I understand. Can I ask a question though?" Bella sounded unsure with the last line.

"You know you can ask me anything."

"Now that you have visited and you no longer have to struggle emotionally with them, are you planning on staying with them?"

Bella sounded so lost at that moment. I wanted to reassure her, let her know that home is where she was. "Bella, I am not going anywhere. I love visiting the Cullen's and will do so more often, but I want to stay in New England."

Relief was evident in her voice."I feel very selfish when I say I'm glad. I did not know what I was going to do if you had decided to stay with them. I would have understood but…" she left that last line unfinished.

She did not need to finish the last line. I just simply responded with an "I know." We sat on the phone in a comfortable quiet. After a moment, I continued, "Why don't you tell me what you have been up to?"

Bella launched into updating me about Charlie and how she had been to the hospital every day for hours, playing cards with him, watching movies, talking. It sounded as if they were really bonding and their relationship was getting stronger. She also mentioned Jacob and his girlfriend, Audrey, and she had seen them as well during the stay. She sounded happy and content.

I glanced at the clock on the wall, and I knew that Rosalie would be coming back with Emmett soon. "Bella, there is nothing more than I want to do then talk to you, but I have to get going, Emmett is going to be back any moment and I promised him we would hunt some grizzly over the next few days."

Even though I could not see her, I could sense her smile and the thought of me and Emmett doing some brotherly bonding. "Grizzly, huh? Well, I better not keep you. I will be busy anyways the next few days with my father and it sounds like it might not be the best idea if I was to call you randomly while you are there. I have booked a flight for the Sunday after next to return, why don't I call you when I get in?"

I hated the idea of not hearing her voice for over a week and a half, but it was probably best. I would make sure I was back home by then so I could see her that night. "Anything you want, Bella."

"Okay… I will see you then. And Jasper?"

"Yes?"

"I miss you."

"Miss you too, Bella."

With that, we hung up. I then heard the roar of Rose's car coming up the driveway. Perfect timing.


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: Thank everyone for the responses to the last few chapters. I am really glad that you all like the story so far. Due to the great responses, I wanted to get this out to everyone quickly. I know how much I love it when one of my favorite stories has quick updates! Makes my day!

**Bella POV:**

I walked into Charlie's hospital room, grateful this would be very last time I would need to enter it. Charlie was sitting on the edge of the bed, fumbling to button the top of his shirt. I walked over to him smiling. "Hey dad. Want some help?"

He grumbled. "Hey, Bella. No, I can do this." He fumbled a few more attempts finally getting another button, but giving up the last two.

"Here dad. Let me get this."I stood in front of him finishing the last two. I then smoothed his shirt. "Much better. Ready to get out of here?"

Charlie smiled largely at that. "Oh Bells, you have _no_ idea."

"Well, we just have to wait for your final discharge papers and then we can head on out. I have a surprise for you when we get home, Dad."

He grumbled. He hated surprises more than I did. "What is it?"

I looked up at him with wide eyes. "You want me to ruin the surprise?"

"Bella. I'm your father. I can still ground you."

I laughed. "No you can't. But fine. I'll tell you anyways. Billy, Jacob, Audrey, and the Clearwater's are coming over tonight for a barbeque. There is a game on later and I figure that you can watch it on the flat screen with Billy."

My dad looked up gratefully. "I think I'll like that."

The doctor walked in then with the papers that Charlie needed to sign so we could leave. I was never so happy to leave a hospital room in all my life. The drive home was fairly quiet, with Charlie looking out the window watching the green on the trees pass by. He seemed more introspective then was even normal for him, but I knew that he had a lot to digest from over the past week. When we got home, I got Charlie settled in his favorite recliner and got to work on lunch for him. I sat down with him as I served it. As we ate, he kept looking at me then looking down. Finally, I placed my sandwich down on the coffee table. "Okay, Dad. What is it? What's bothering you?"

He looked embarrassed. "Nothing is bothering me."

"Well, then, why do you keep looking at me like that?"

He smiled softly. "It's just, you look good. You really look happy. You have not looked that happy in a very, very long time. Everything about you is relaxed. Boston must be agreeing with you."

"Everyone keeps saying that."

"Well, then it must be true." Charlie paused again, looking embarrassed.

"What?" I stated exasperated now.

"Is there a young man that is contributing to Boston's contribution to your wellbeing?"

"Dad!" But I smiled inwardly to myself. _Not so young._ I decided to tell him the truth, kind of. "There is someone, but nothing has happened yet so I don't want to jinx it. I promise dad, if it becomes something serious, I will let you know."

"Well, you let the man know your father is Chief of Police."

"Oh, don't worry dad, he already knows that. Trust me." We both smiled.

Charlie still glanced my way now and again throughout the meal. Finally, he placed down his sandwich. "You know, getting shot kind of put things in perspective for me, Bella."

"I'm sure." I was not sure exactly where he was going with this.

"It made me begin to think about what will happen if I am gone. I want you know how lucky I feel that you decided to come live with me all these years, that you gave me the opportunity to be a part of your life, let me help raise you. You do not know what a complete joy you have been in my life. You have been a wonderful daughter and I consider myself the luckiest father."

"Da-"

Charlie held his hand up and I stopped mid-sentence. "You have been a wonderful daughter." He repeated. "And even though you are twenty three and technically grown up, I still worry about you. I want you to know that you are my sole benefactor in my will. You will get my retirement and the house. You will be more then taken care of."

"Da-"

He stopped me again. "And if you should be so lucky as to have that young man care about you back, I would like to meet him. I can already tell that he is good for you. You are practically glowing and you look like my old Bella. Even Jacob couldn't do that for you and he is your best friend. I love you, Bella."

I just nodded, with tears in my eyes as he finished. My father is not the kind of man to wear his heart on his sleeve. The gunshot wound really must have scared Charlie. I walked over to him giving him a big hug, making sure to avoid his bad arm. "I love you too, Dad."

We ate the rest of our lunch in silence as I contemplated what would happen if Jasper and I became serious, which I thought was going to happen. I know my father would want to meet him, but how would I let my father know? My father held a lot of animosity towards the Cullen family for up and leaving the way they did. I did not blame him. If I was in his place, I would have as well. He would take it hard that my newest boyfriend was the brother of the one that broke my heart. Furthermore, if things progressed with Jasper the way I hoped, what if I decided to be turned? That would destroy my father. Then a small voice in my head asked- _Would Jasper even want me turned, or would he be like Edward, insisting that I stay human? _

The afternoon passed with my preparing the Barbeque for everyone. I decided as a special treat I would make my famous seven layer chocolate cake, which was my father's favorite. I was so relaxed being back home in this kitchen, yet as much I as I liked it here, I found myself continually thinking of my apartment, Jasper, and my conversation with my father.

As the cake baked in the oven, I walked into the back yard, enjoying a rare sunny day in Forks. I rubbed my hands on my arms, trying to keep warm. Although the rays were coming down on me, there was a slight wind that emphasized the coolness in the air. I closed my eyes, allowing myself to think about what it would be like to be in a physical relationship with Jasper. I had the distinct feeling that Jasper would not hold back like Edward had, and I hoped that my instinct was correct. While a chaste relationship was fine for me as a seventeen year old girl, this woman craved a physical relationship that would go beyond the bounds of just kissing. I wanted Jasper, there was no doubt about that. I was highly attracted to him, and I wanted to display it and show him in every physical way possible when the moment was right. I just hoped that he let me.

Just as I began to daydream about taking off Jaspers shirt, button by button, revealing that ripped abdomen, my thoughts were interrupted by a yell from my father asking if I could get him his prescription medication. I sauntered back in, pushing back my dirty thoughts I had been thinking of, knowing my daydream would have easily progressed into doing things seen in Harlequin Romance novels. Instead it was back to reality. I glanced at the medication sheet to see what pills my father should be taking now. I grabbed the Vicodin and another pill I could not pronounce and gave them to my father with a glass of water.

The buzzer rang on the cake a few minutes later. I spent the rest of the afternoon preparing the cake, and around five pm, Charlie's friends began to arrive. I smiled as Charlie's spirits were clearly lifted by his friend's arrivals. I made Jacob in charge of beginning a small fire in the pit out back and grilling. Audrey and I stood in the kitchen together making a salad. She looked so happy and was practically bouncing up and down.

I couldn't help but smile. "You are really happy tonight Audrey. What's up?"

Audrey looked around to see if anyone else was in the room. She leaned in. "I think Jake is going to propose soon."

My smile widened. "That is wonderful!" I hugged her tightly. "When do you think he will do it?"

She stated that she was not sure exactly when, but he kept making little comments, like he was trying to figure out her ring size. I couldn't help but be thrilled for her. It's amazing that at one point, I thought I would have ended up with Jacob, but those two just seemed so right together. Knowing that my friend and his girl where about to move on to the next phase in life made me so incredibly happy for them. My heart ached a little hoping that I would find that kind of love myself very soon with Jasper.

The food was ready a few minutes later, and we all piled up our plates, sitting around the roaring fire. Soon Billy Black and Sue Clearwater began roasting Charlie, regaling us with stories from his younger years and some of the stupider things he had done. We all laughed, enjoying the stories. I looked over at Jacob whose arms were wrapped tightly around Audrey. He gave me one of his famous smiles, and I couldn't help but return it. At this moment I was completely content. The only thing that could make me happier was if a certain someone was here with me.

At that moment, I felt my phone vibrate. It indicated I had a message. I opened it up to see what the text said.

_Emmett already bagged his first grizzly. Miss you. -J_

I smiled down at the text. He was here with me after all.


	18. Chapter 18

Long Author's note: BIG THANKS TO EVERYONE. I am humbled that I got almost 100 reviews from the last two chapters. Thank you again, I'll say it again, the reviews make my day and I appreciate each and every one of you. You all rock!

So here we are back with the Cullen's a little Emmett/Jasper. I love Emmett, don't you?? I wish he was my big brother.

And to Merina Green, although I could not fully put your idea in the story, I really liked it, so I thought it at least deserved a mention in the story. I decided to condense the Jasper chapter to one instead of two, that way we could all get to what we really want quicker… you know what it is ;) So a little less time with the Cullens, but I really feel that I have stated pretty much what I needed to state with them… _ for now._

Also, if any of you like Jacob/Bella stories, I just discovered a fantastic one called _The Passing Years_ by RainyPromise. The depiction of the relationship between Bella and Jacob is wonderfully complex and it is a terrific read. There are also a ton of great Jasper/Bella fics I am also enjoying immensely right now, three of them are Long, Lean, Texan, Calefaction, and Worth the Pain. If you haven't checked out those stories, do so. They are worth your time!

Japser's POV

Emmett had bagged his first grizzly of the trip right away when we arrived. While running back to where I was, I could tell he was elated, but I could feel a small amount of disappointment as well. Emmett always did like a challenge, which explained why he and Rosalie worked so well together. Emmett came up just as I finished texting Bella to let her know I was thinking of her, and I put away the phone before he could notice.

"That was too easy, Em." I smiled.

He flexed his muscles proudly. "Maybe I am just that good."

"More like lucky is like it. I mean, it's not like you could catch me or anything." As I egged him on jokingly, I took off into the woods, knowing he would be just behind me chasing me. I missed this with Emmett. He and I always had the easiest relationship in the house and he was my favorite to go hunting with. It was usually three days of hunting and playing. Very relaxing.

I easily navigated through the forest, the trees nothing more than blurs of green. I avoided boulders and precarious edges, sometime narrowly, trying to through Emmett off my trail. I jumped over a river, and made a quick left turn to a meadow. Sensing Emmett coming up behind me, I did not have time to gain my bearings so I headed for the left side of the meadow. Unfortunately, I looked up, and saw Emmett fly down at me from a treetop, tackling me to the ground.

"Ugh!"

"Gotcha!" he laughed.

"I'm outta practice. You won't get me again." I mumbled, but with affection in my voice.

"Yes, I will."

I rolled out from underneath him and sat up brushing off the leaves and dirt that were on me. I grinned, looking at my brother. "You've gotten faster."

"Naw, I've always been faster than you. I just got better at tracking over the past year. That was always my trouble with you and Edward. You were both stealthy. With you and Edward gone, I needed to do something when I needed some time away from Rosie after she got mad at me."

I shook my head. "You must have practiced _a lot_."

He smiled. Emmett knew it was true, but her spirit was what he loved about her. "If you only knew, bro. But today, I at least on not the receiving end of her fury. Man, you pissed her off something fierce."

I grimaced. "I could tell from the way she peeled out of the driveway."

"She went on and on about how you were hiding something from the family and how it wasn't right. She kept stating that she was going to steal your cell and find out what it was you were hiding. I told her if she did, I would withhold _relations_ for a month."

I couldn't help but laugh at that. Emmett threatening to withhold sex? That was like pronouncing the sky was green. "And how did Rose take that?"

"Uh… not too well. There is now a hole in the garage door. Esme will not be pleased when she gets home tonight."

"Yeah, the last thing I would want to do is get on Esme's bad side." I thought about the lashing that Rose was going to receive tonight for that one. "But thank you for respecting my privacy and stopping her."

We sat for a few moments, enjoying the peace and quiet of the woods. After a few minutes had passed, Emmett looked at me. "Seriously though, Jasper. If there is anything you need to tell me… "

I put my hand on Emmett's shoulder. "When the time is right, Emmett, I will tell the entire family. For now, I just need to sort some things out on my own. I am not hiding anything to be malicious. There are just some things I can't discuss… not yet."

Emmett nodded. "I understand, Bro. When you are ready, I'll be here."

"Thank you Em. That means more to me then you know." I decided to change the subject with Emmett. "So, you decided to enroll back in school with English Literature. Why Literature?" While I never underestimated Emmett's intelligence, I never knew him to be a bookworm like Edward or myself.

Emmett just shrugged. "I don't know to be honest. In the past I have majored in things like Business and Kinesiology. They fit my interests. But something was nagging at me to branch out. I enjoy reading; I just don't do a lot of it. Usually I will read when Rose and I are on whatever honeymoon we are on. I think I have lost count of how many times we've gotten married at this point… Anyways, when Rose decided she would just rather stay here with Esme and Carlisle, I decided that I would enroll in the local classes. It's much different than the universities we have attended in the past. "

It was nice to see a different side of Emmett. "So what are you currently reading?"

"I actually just finished reading a book called the Violent Bear it Away, by Flannery O'Connor."

Jasper was vaguely familiar with the book but had never read it. "What is it about?"

"The main character goes by the name of Tarwater, in the book his is trying to fulfill a destiny of baptizing his cousin, Bishop. For me there are two major themes to the book. One is what seems like the most obvious theme of the book is the idea that destiny and religion will dominate over the secular. The other theme I find prevalent is the idea that everything that destroys also creates is evident as well in the novel. Nearly every symbol and character in the book pulls Tarwater away from his destiny but also pushes him back. It's a good read. I really enjoy the symbolism in the book and it challenges your intelligence."

I can't help it, but I look at Emmett in amazement, I would have never have pegged him for the analytical type.

After a moment, Emmett looks at me. "What!?! You are giving me the same look that Rose gave me when I described the book. Geez, people. Can't a vampire have layers?"

***

Three days later and Emmett and I were heading back to the house, Emmett bagged three grizzlies total while I bagged a cougar and several Elk. It was a satisfying trip. Maine did not afford the variety that British Columbia did in terms of large carnivores.

I was a bit worried about Rose then closer we got to the house. Emmett advised that it was probably the best that I stay away until he had a chance to talk to her. I agreed wholeheartedly.

Esme was the first to come to the door, kissing us both on the cheek as we passed through the entrance. "Did you have a nice outing?"

"It was really relaxing, Esme. Next time you should come with us." She beamed at the use of the word _next_.

"Well, anytime you want to come and visit Jasper, I'll be more than happy too. Speaking of which, when do you have to leave?"

I had been there over a week and knew that I would need to leave in the next few days. "Too soon Esme. Probably four days." I could feel the disappointment rising in her. I hugged her shoulders and said to her- "Don't worry, I promise I will not wait so long for a visit. Maybe I can try to make it up while Edward is here."

That line seemed to raise her spirits; although it made me worry. Next time I saw Edward, I would keep my promise to Carlisle and tell Edward about Bella and me. I hated the idea of ruining the family reunion, but Carlisle was right, he deserved to know sooner than later. While on my hunt with Emmett, I had made up my mind to avoid Christmas with the Cullen's, letting them enjoy the holiday, but to tell him soon thereafter while he was still on break.

Now was not the time for those thoughts, however, it was a time to enjoy being around my family. The next few days, I spent mostly enjoying the company of everyone. Rose eventually even returned to her more normal self and although curiosity still seeped from her at times, the anger and frustration had dissipated considerably. When it was time to go, it was with mixed feelings I went. This time was considerably harder to leave then the last time. I made repeated promises to visit everyone soon, but I as much as I would miss them, I was anxious to board my flight.

My Bella would only arrive a few short hours after me. I couldn't wait to pick up where we had left off.


	19. Chapter 19

**Bella POV**

I evaluated the suitcases one more time before closing them, making sure I had everything with me. I glanced sideways at Charlie.

"Now Dad, you are sure you will be alright?" The past two weeks had flown by, and as anxious as I was to get back home, I worried for Charlie.

Charlie sighed and looked at me impatiently. "Bella, how many times do I have to tell you, I will be fine. Sue Clearwater has promised to come over and help, and Lord knows that you made enough meals for me to last me for the next year. You have your own life to get back to, you know."

I heard Jacob honk his horn for the second time outside, indicating that it was time to go. Couldn't he have just come in for crying out loud? I leaned over to hug my dad one last time. "I'll be out to visit soon, Dad. Not sure when, but as soon as I get the all clear, I will come visit again. I love you."

"Love you too, Bells."

At the third beep, I rolled my eyes dramatically and picked up my suitcase and carry-on. I walked out the door, walking over to the car, moving deliberately slowly to piss Jacob Black off. When I finally settled in the car, Jacob looked over. "Hey Bella!"

I didn't even greet him back. "Seriously? What was with the beeping?"

"Did you like it?" I shot him a death glance and he smirked before continuing. "It's just your flight is running on time and I wanted to make sure you did not miss it. I figured the annoying horn beep would get you out of the house quicker. You are already a few minutes behind."

With that being said, Jacob got me to the airport in record time. He drove almost as fast as Jasper. Almost. I figured that he would just drop me off, but he had decided to follow me in. We were making general chitchat about him and Audrey when it was time for me to check in my bags. Looking at my luggage I stated, "Well, I guess this is goodbye."

Jacob turned me around, giving me another one of his bone crushing hugs. "Can't… breathe… Jake!"

Jacob set me down. His face was a mixture of sadness and seriousness. "I'm going to miss you. Can't you stay here in Forks?"

I grabbed his hand and looked up at him fondly. "My life is in Boston now, Jake. At least for now. You know that you and Audrey can visit whenever you want. "

Jacob just nodded. It was the same plea he made several months ago before I left and I am sure he was not expecting a different response from me. He looked intently at me. "Bella… remember what we talked about in the kitchen that day. I am _always_ here if you need me. If you feel unsafe with that leech"

"Jasper." I corrected him.

"Sure, sure. Jasper. Seriously though, if something ever happens, you call me."

I nodded. "I already promised that I would, but trust me when I say it won't."

"I do want to meet him eventually. You know I don't think anyone, especially his kind, can be good enough for you, but I am grown up enough to realize this is not my life and you need to live it. I love you, Bells."

I reached up to give him a peck on the cheek, "And I love you too, Jake. Take care of Audrey and keep an eye on my dad for me."

"You know that I will." With that, I walked through the gate. I turned around to see my friend walking away, navigating the masses. I sighed, knowing I would miss him like always, but then excitement suddenly filled me. I would be home in just a few short hours and would see Jasper again.

My flight again was uneventful, although I did have the bitchiest flight attendant known to man. Seriously, how hard was it to get me a coffee? Throughout the flight, I found myself getting more and more nervous. Every scenario that could happen between Jasper and I played out. First there was the wonderful, both being madly in love with each other, then there was the horrific, I love you but you don't love me scenario and finally there was the one I feared most. I love you, but I think it's better if we are friends because I am a dangerous vampire. By the time the airplane landed, I was a jittery mess of nerves.

I was never more grateful for deciding to use a taxi service at that moment then having Jasper pick me up directly. I needed to calm myself before I saw him. These feelings were irrational at best. Whatever happens, happens. Nothing I can do to change it. Besides, I am pretty sure that he feels the same way. By the time the taxi pulled up to the apartment, I was calmer.

I noticed that Jasper was not here yet. I walked into the apartment, turning on the lights, leaving my suitcase in the hallway. I glanced at the clock on the stove, and noted it was already seven thirty at night already. I spoke to my boss Friday to confirm I was coming in Monday. She had advised me that work was going to be extremely busy this week with a looming deadline. I knew tonight was going to be my only opportunity to see Jasper before next weekend.

After a few minutes of restlessly flipping through a magazine and putting some of the clothes I brought to Forks in the wash, I heard a car pull up. I glanced out the window, and saw Jasper step out of the car. My heart began to beat rapidly at the sight of him. He looked perfect. His blond locks disheveled in that normal slightly messy way he wore it, his shirt and pants perfectly pressed as was the usual. His face was perfection as always, not that it would ever change or look older than it was now. _Oh my God. I really am head over heels for him._ I took a deep breath, willing my heart to slow down. _Breathe Bella. Just breathe._

As he came up the steps, I flew open the door. I knew my face must look like the Cheshire cat, but I couldn't will myself to care. I looked at him, I missed him so much. He had a big smile grace his face. I flung myself at him, wrapping him in a huge embrace. "Jasper!" I murmured into his shoulder.

"Bella." He said my name, so softly I almost did not hear it. He held onto me tightly, and I returned the hug with equal fervor.

I pressed my face against his chest, breathing in the scent of him slowly and deliberately, my body and nerves relaxing instantly. I knew that this is where I belonged, in his arms, like this. Nothing ever felt as right as this moment right here.

We pulled away slightly, smiles still touching our faces. His hands caressed my arms gently. With fondness, he asked, "How was your trip? How was your father?"

We walked over to the couch where we sat down, me on one side of the couch, himself on the other. I couldn't take my eyes off of him, I resisted every urge I had to seduce him. I laughed at that thought… the idea of Bella Swan seducing anyone was laughable. I played coy and cute well, but sexy seductress I was not.

So I launched into how my two weeks went. I talked about Charlie's recovery, Jacob's probable engagement, and other items that seemed rather trivial now that Jasper was here in front of me. Jasper sat quietly, taking it all in, listening intently.

Jasper moved over closer to me throughout the conversation, taking my hand in his. I could not tell if the coolness of his hand was what sent chills down my spine, or the simple touch of his placing his hand on mine. His golden orbs were intently locked on my brown ones throughout my entire endless ramblings of my visit. It made it very hard to concentrate.

I nervously shook my head. "I'm sorry, I've been going on and on about me."

"There is nothing to apologize for. I love hearing you talk, Bella." He pulled me into him. I couldn't help but sigh softly. The embrace was comforting. I glanced at the clock, seeing that it was almost ten pm. It was late and I was going to have a long day tomorrow, but I wasn't ready to go to bed yet. It had been two weeks since I had seen him, and the last thing I wanted to do was send him away.

"Well, what about you?" As much as I just wanted to snuggle next to him, I had to admit to myself that I was very curious about his trip to visit Carlisle and all of them. I wanted to hear how they all were. Jasper stroked my hair softly, and in gentle whispers told me about all Carlisle and them. His storytelling as always was wonderful, and I felt like I visited them along with him.

I glanced up every one in a while at him while he was telling the story. He would kiss me gently on the top of the head before continuing. Soon, I felt my eyes begin to droop. Midnight.

"Bella?" Jasper stated softly. I knew I murmured an incoherent response. I snuggled closer into his chest, wrapping my arms around his neck. Even though I was in a sleep induced haze, I could feel Jasper relax. Jasper breathed in my hair and rubbed my back soothingly. I sighed contently. I didn't want to leave this, I did not want to go to bed.

Even though I was exhausted, I suddenly remembered my surprise for Jasper. I forced my eyes to flutter open. "Jasper?"

Jasper continued to massage my back gently. "Yes, my Bella?" My heart began to do flips at the mention of _my Bella_. Did he have any idea what those words do to me?

Trying to suppress a yawn, I quietly stated. "I was hoping you would go away with me next weekend. Two weekends ago was so wonderful and I wanted to return the favor."

"I think I can manage that. Can I ask what we are doing?"

I replied with a large yawn, "I wanted to surprise you."

"I would like nothing more." He kissed the top of my head again. In Jasper's arms, I then fell into a deep slumber, dreaming of moments that were hopefully to come.

**A/N: Yes, I realize that the Jacob involvement is still a mystery. That was done intentionally. Hope you all enjoyed the chapter. I decided to have them see each other in this chapter rather than make you all wait. Thanks everyone.**


	20. Chapter 20

Bella was sleeping soundly into my chest. She snored softly, occasionally murmuring a sentence or phrase, and sometimes I would be rewarded with "Jasper" falling from her lips. I had not moved for hours and I glanced at the clock, knowing I would need to leave soon before the impending dawn made its arrival.

I wrapped her arms around me tighter, and stood gently to carry her to bed. Even with my vampiric graces, she still stirred from her sleep, her eyes fluttering open. I knew I should send her a wave of calm to make her fall right back asleep, but I was selfish, wanting to her voice as I wouldn't be able to in person for almost another week.

"Jasper? Where are we going?" Bella asked as she buried her face deeper into my chest.

"I am bringing you to bed. It's almost dawn."

"Don't go. Stay."

I kissed her hair as we entered her bedroom. "There is nothing more than I would like to do, but the weather calls for clear skies today." I laid her down gently on the bed, pulling the covers over her. She resisted slightly, but gave in quickly. "Call me tonight when you get in, okay?"

She nodded. I bent down, pressing my lips to her forehead. "That's my girl." I sent a wave of calm through her then and her eyes fluttered shut. When her breathing was slow and steady, I stood up to leave. At the doorway of her room, I turned to her once more, whispering even though I knew she was fast asleep. "I love you, Bella."

****

When Friday evening hit, I jumped in the car, making my way towards Bella's. I had to admit, I was very curious about the surprise she had in store for us this weekend. Bella was right, she had worked long hours at her job this week. From the brief conversations we would have each night, she was up at six in the morning and home after ten pm. Friday night would be no exception, but Bella had asked me last night on the phone to be at her place ready to go when she got there. The only hints she had even given me was to pack a couple of days worth of clothes, do some extensive hunting before we left tonight, and have a tank full of gas.

The time was nine thirty when I arrived at her place, Bella still not there. She had given me a key two months ago, so I let myself quietly in. I noticed Bella had a suitcase already packed in the living room as well. I sat myself down on the couch, turning on the TV, catching Roman Holiday with Audrey Hepburn on TV. At ten o'clock precisely, I heard her SUV pull up and park.

She climbed up the stairs, giving me a quick hug. Bella's eyes had bags under them, the weariness from the work week evident on her. But the eyes themselves shined with excitement. "Ready?" she asked, "We have a long trip ahead of us."

"So where are we going?" I asked, grabbing her bag as we walked out the door and she locked up behind her.

"I'll tell you once we get on the road _where_ we are going, but not what we are doing." She yawned, climbing into the car.

"Tired?"

"Very. I'll probably talk to you for a little bit, but then sleep if you don't mind?"

"Not at all. You had a tough week from the look of it."

She yawned as I pulled out of the driveway. "That bad, huh?" She grabbed my GPS, punching in an address. She handed the GPS to me. "And here is our destination."

I looked at the GPS and raised my eyebrows. "Charlestown, South Carolina?"

She grinned. "Yep. Road trip! Per MapQuest, we can get there in fifteen hours. With your driving, easily twelve, so with you driving all night, we should get there by eleven am max."

I smiled. I had spent a little time in Charlestown previously, but hadn't been back. "That sounds about right. So… if I remember correctly, Charlestown is a pretty sunny place. How are we getting around that?'

"Well…" a smile crept up on her face. "It is actually going to drizzle most of this weekend down there. Of course, I did not know that at the time, but the place we are staying at has a covered parking garage next to it, so we could have gotten you in the hotel without exposing you to sunlight if it hadn't."

Pulling onto the highway I turned to her. "You sure you don't want to tell me what we are doing?"

"No way. I have been planning this for three weeks now. My lips are sealed, Jasper Whitlock."

I could feel her resolve, so I decided to change subjects. "How was work?"

She sighed. "It's been awful. We are behind on a deadline and the editor is none too pleased about it. So all of us in the proofreading department have been working crazy hours this week to complete the project. Luckily, our department should be done early next week with it and then I can go back to normal hours again."

"Do you find the work fulfilling?"

Bella looked at me, thinking carefully before answering. "I like the publishing world, but I somehow thought it was more glamorous than it truly is. I am a little disenchanted by it all now that I have seen it from the inside. " she shook her head. "I don't know. I guess it was just a tough week, you know? All I know is that I am ready to relax this weekend. I'm glad I get to spend it with you. We were together all the time and then for the past three weeks I have barely seen you." She grabbed my hand, giving it an appreciative squeeze.

I squeezed back gently. "I'm glad too. Whatever it is that you have planned, I am sure we will have a great time. I feel like you know me almost better than anyone else."

She looked straight ahead, paying attention to the headlights on the other side of the highway. "Except for Alice you mean."

"In some ways, you know me better than she did. Alice had the gift of time to get to know me throughout the years, learning what each of us liked and didn't. But Alice did not intuitively know. It was a learning process. As much as I loved Alice, she and I were very different creatures. We complimented each other, but for a long time, she did not know what made me tick and I didn't know what made her tick. It was a fun learning process. But with you, we were not close when you were with Edward. We have truly only known each other since the beginning of August and it's now November. But despite all of that, I feel like you understand me. You instinctively know who I am, why I am the way I am, and what makes me Jasper. So I guess what I am saying is, while Alice and I complimented each other by being polar opposites, you are my companion, the one who is like me the most, and therefore by default can understand things in a few short weeks that took Alice years to."

In the glare from the oncoming traffic, I could see unshed tears from Bella. A small smile graced her face. "Thank you. That has to be the nicest thing anyone has ever told me. I wish I could say the same for Edward and I. But Edward and I… well, he was the protector and I was the one who needed the protection. End of story. I look back now, and for the life of me Jasper, I cannot figure out what pulled me to him so. I remember being so insanely head over heels in love. But truly, looking back, we had nothing in common, no middle ground to start from. I used to think same as you that opposites attracted. I mean, you and Alice were living, or well, unliving proof of that. And I thought that Edward and I were too. But whereas you and Alice wanted to learn and grow from each other, Edward never really wanted that. He felt he knew what was best for me and that I should always follow him. Where was the give and take? Where was the equal footing of it all? But with you, I feel like I have always known you, that we are kindred spirits and fate found a way for us to get to know each other even though we were in time a hundred and fifty years apart. I don't know how we never got close years ago. But I am rambling. The point I was trying to make is that I think you know me better than Edward ever would or will."

We drove in silence then, neither one of us needing to say more but needing to say everything all at once. But the car was not the time for me to state a declaration of my feelings. So we drove, the night looming before us, the words spoken betweens us playing in each of our minds. We passed through several states that way, and somewhere around one in the morning, Bella fell asleep.

With my free hand, I caressed her face lovingly. Bella was right. I had learned a long time ago from Alice that fate played more of a hand than I ever cared to admit. And fate had brought me to this woman sitting in the car beside me.

**A/N: I know I try to update every few days, but life has been hectic to state the least. This was going to be a much longer chapter, but I think that this is a good place to stop and pick up the rest in the next chapter that way I could get something out to everyone! I anticipate that the next chapter will be Jasper's POV as well.**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Okay, I know I stated that this chapter would be from Jasper's POV, but I changed my mind. The next chapter is definitely from Jasper's POV as it is mostly written already, which I know you all will love as it means posting quicker!! Again, thank you everyone for your reviews. As I mentioned in my last author's note, life has been crazy to the max, and I have cherished each review!**

**Bella's POV**

My eyes opened as the dark was giving way to daylight. I looked at the time, six-fifteen am. A country radio station was playing softly. I stretched my arms out fully, emitting a large yawn. I looked outside the window at the passing landscape and then over to Jasper, who was tapping along to the music. He looked over, a large smile gracing his lips. I easily returned it with my own. "Morning. Where are we?"

"Morning to you too. We are in Virginia at the moment, but getting ready to pass into North Carolina."

"Wow. Already?"

"I may have gone a bit over the speed limit while you were asleep."

I chuckled. "May have? How fast? No, wait. I don't wait to know."

"You really don't."

I saw an exit that indicated food and rest facilities."Can we pull over at the next exit? I need some food, coffee, and… a human moment. Not necessarily in that order."

He pulled off the exit and into the Starbucks that was not even a mile down the road. I jumped out of the car, grabbing a small backpack I had brought with me in addition to the suitcase. I finished my human moment, changed into a clean pair of jeans and sweatshirt then glanced in the mirror. My mascara was smudged and my hair was frazzled slightly. Not the best look in front of the person I was trying to impress, but I imagined it could have been a lot worse. I brushed my teeth and washed my face quickly. I added on my normal light makeup, and brushed my hair out. Doing a quick look over, I did not look too bad.

I stepped outside of the ladies room and saw Jasper leaning up against the wall, coffee and Danish in hand. "I hope you didn't mind that I got the coffee for you." I took the Danish eagerly from his hand, shoving it very unladylike in my mouth.

After a swallowed a bite, I answered. "This is perfect. Thank you. Ready to hit the road again? If we get there early enough, maybe we can get in several hours of sightseeing before…" I trailed off, blushing furiously. All this planning and I almost gave it away. "Well, nevermind."

We got back on the highway, and busied ourselves with car games. It was unfair really; with Jaspers especially keen eyesight he could see a punch buggy or a license plate way before I could. But still, it passed the time and was realitively fun even though I knew Jasper let me get a few of them on purpose.

My excitement grew as I saw the sign that we had entered South Carolina. Soon we would be at Charleston. I hoped that everything was going according to plan. I was dependant upon the others to make sure that everything was there and correct. At this point there was no use worrying, what would be, would be.

"Are you okay, Bella? I can feel a million emotions coming off you all at once. I swear, until I had met you, I never knew humans were capable of feeling so many different emotions so strongly all at once."

"I am fine, just fine. Now focus on driving." I tried to give a reassuring smile but knew my attempt was feeble. As we got closer to our destination, our GPS, whose voice we had named Gia, gave us more and more directions. Gia had been pretty quiet for the past few hours until we had reached the border. Now, as we passed through the beauty of South Carolina, she was ordering us constantly.

"Turn Left." Gia advised monotonely.

"Gia needs to get out more, she sounds so bored with us." I joked as Jasper made a left off the exit.

"Turn Right in 2.3 miles." The machine droned on again.

"Yes, Gia is in need of a good time it seems." Jasper grinned. Poor Gia. Throughout our discussions on the ride down, it had been determined that she was a fifty-seven year old Spinster who lived with twenty cats and enjoyed Jepordy. Jasper drove on for the 2.3 miles as instructed.

"Turn Right. Arriving at destination." Gia still did not sound happy, but I sure was. I had not realized we arrived there. The hotel was located in the French quarter and was breathtaking from the outside. It had taken some of my savings I had acquired throughout the years for this weekend, but it was well worth it.

"French Quarter Inn. This is very nice." Jasper mused as he pulled up to the garage that was attached to the hotel. He parked and walked over to my side of the door, holding it open.

Walking into the foyer of the hotel, we were immediately greeted by a large winding staircase and atrium. Once I had finished admiring the splendor of it all, I went to the front desk to check us in.

A perky young woman with a nametag that said Eleanor greeted us. "Welcome to the French Quarter Inn. How can I help y'all today?" I couldn't help but notice her not so suptle appreciation of my male companion beside me.

I coughed slightly, bringing her attention back to me. "I have a reservation. Bella Swan."

Eleanor typed in the name, glancing at the computer in front of her. "There you are! Let me just get you two sets of keys." She bent down and a moment later popped back up, two keys in hand. "Here you go. Miss Swan, the preparations are all set and the package will arrive on time as you requested. Enjoy your evening." She winked briefly at me. I thanked her and then turned away from the desk. Jasper grabbed the bags, following me. We walked to the elevator and I pressed the key for the fourth floor. I couldn't help but have a permanent grin. While I may hate surprises, I found that I loved giving them. Jasper looked at me curiously. "What was that about.? Do I get to be in on the secret now?"

"Not yet! But soon." The elevator doors opened and we found our room. Jasper placed down the suitcases and looked around. "This is very nice Bella. How did you afford this?"

I scoffed at him, slightly annoyed. Yes, it was the Deluxe King Suite but it was only one night. It's not like I booked the place for the week. "I have always been very responsible with money, Jasper. I usually don't splurge, and well, I wanted to splurge a little. Is there a problem."

He looked guilty. "No… of course not. I'm sorry. I am not used to others besides Alice spending money on me. And Alice cheated by using her powers to play the stock market so I never worried when she was extravagant."

I smiled, knowing exactly what he meant. "Yes, but this is nothing compared to what Alice would have done."

"You're right… let's just forget I even asked that. So what are we doing this afternoon?"

I took a brief look at the clock. "Well, we have several hours before we need to do anything. I was thinking that we could go to Waterfront Park and walk along the ocean but we don't have to. Now that we are here, is there anything in particular you want to do?"

"Waterfront Park sounds nice. "

Instead of taking our car, we decided to walk to the park since it was relatively close by. The park was quite lovely. We strolled along the walkway, admiring the trees, the fountains, and the ocean. At some point, Jasper had taken my hand in his lightly. I couldn't help but look up at him, his hair moving slightly in the wind, his face relaxed. So often with his gift, he seemed to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders, having had to absorb everyone else's worries on top of his own over the years. I loved it when he looked just like he did now in this moment. I loved him. I imagined us years down the road, just like this, taking strolls, enjoying each other's company. I laughed at myself. Here I was planning our future and I had not even gotten up the courage to kiss him.

I continued contemplating kissing him right then and there, when I heard a soft beeping. I glanced down at my watch and realized it was time to head back. I sighed, realizing the kissing would have to wait till some other moment. "Time to go."

I wasn't an empath, but I could tell that Jasper's curiousity was peaked. We headed to our room. The moment we entered the threshold, I turned to give Jasper his instructions. "It's three o'clock. I have an appointment to go to right now. You can relax here for the next couple of hours or go and explore some more, but a 5:15pm, a package will arrive. Just make sure you are here. I should be here by 5:45 at the latest." I gave him a quick peck on the side of his face. Well, if I couldn't get up the courage to kiss him on the lips, I would settle for kissing him on the cheek. "I gotta go."

I took the elevator down to the spa and for the next two and a half hours I had two women working on my makeup, but mostly my hair. I had given them a picture of the hairstyle I wanted to duplicate. Hopefully, I would not look ktoo ridiculous on me. Once it was announced I was complete, the only thing left was for me to get into my dress and shoes. I had called in my measurements and prayed for the best. The two women at the spa assisted me. When they were completely done, they turned me to face the full length mirror. I squeezed my eyes shut, not fearing for the worst.

The older woman pinched me lightly. "Open your eyes! Look! Just beautiful."

I looked in amazement. This was not me. It just couldn't be me. I could not wipe the smile from my face. I couldn't wait to see Jasper.

**A/N: Hope everyone liked this chapter. As always, please read and review! I am posting a link to the hotel I am using on my profile. Next chapter I will post a picture of the dress Bella is wearing on the profile too.**


	22. Chapter 22

Author's note: So… here we are folks! I love this scene and have pictured this scene in my head since I first thought of this story. When researching everything for this chapter, I was researching the correct civil war era ball gowns. I came across this one and the second I laid eyes on it, I knew it was the gown I wanted to describe in my story. When I looked at the name of the gown, I knew I was right. You are never going to believe this. The store that sells this gown online named the gown- "ISABELLA". If that is not a sign that this is the dress that should go in my story, nothing is!! Go to my author's link to see the clothing described here.

Jasper's POV:

I spent the remainder of the afternoon after Bella left trying to watch a movie, but I couldn't concentrate. My mind was distracted. I never thought I would be content as I am now after Alice. But meeting Bella again had changed all that. The afternoon at Waterfront Park had been relaxing. Walking hand in hand with her, I thought about what it would be like to do this with her for the rest of time. I felt foolish; I hadn't even mustered up the courage to kiss her yet.

I forced my thoughts back to the here and now. The clock read 5:12pm and I had to admit to myself that I was insanely curious about what Bella had planned. At five- fifteen on the dot, I heard a quick wrap at the door. I opened it to reveal at bellhop holding a package wrapped in plain brown paper.

"Mr. Jasper Whitlock?"

"Yes?'

"For you." The bellhop handed me the package. I took the package and reached into my wallet, tipping him.

The boy smiled. "Thank you! Have fun tonight! I heard it's a lot of fun."

I eyed him curiously. "What is?"

The boy realized he slipped. "Shit." He muttered under his breath. "Uh… nothing. Well, I gotta go." With that he turned and walked down the hall briskly. I closed the door and glanced at the package briefly more opening it. To say I was surprised was an understatement. How did she do this? In my hands, was a confederate uniform, complete with the frock coat with the marking of the rank of major on it. There was a note attached to the uniform. I immediately recognized it as Bella's.

_Jasper-_

_Surprised yet? I should be back in just a little bit. I hope the uniform fits. I had to guess your size since I ordered this while I was still back in Forks. I saw this event when I was surfing the internet on the plane several weeks back and I thought that you might like to relive a part of your human youth._

_Fondly,_

_Bella_

There was a hard piece of cardstock attached to the letter. It was an invitation to the fifteenth annual Charleston Civil War Ball being held in this very hotel this evening. I shook my head in amazement. I did not know how Bella managed to pull all of this off without me even suspecting. It made me just care for her all that much more.

I carefully put the letter and invitation on the nightstand, wanting to keep those as mementos of this trip and laid the uniform on the bed. After jumping in the shower to wash off the remains of the day, I dried off my hair and then slowly put on the uniform in front of me. It was an exact replica of the last uniform I had ever worn before Maria turned me. I glanced in the mirror. For some reason, it surprised me. For with the exception of the paler skin tone, this could have been me back in 1863 again. The memories as always were foggy, but being in this uniform again somehow made me feel closer to them, closer to my human existence again. I could practically hear my fellow soldiers again, telling stories by the campfires, singing songs. I found myself lost in the memories when a voice interrupted them.

"Good Evening, Major Whitlock". I turned to where the familiar female voice had come from. My eyes took in the breathtaking woman in front of me. Bella had transformed into a beautiful southern belle. The gown was completely true to the ball gowns of my youth. With sleeves that were off the shoulder with black trim lace, the gown was tight in the waist and the bodice of the dress was low enough that Bella's breasts showed very nicely, leaving little to the imagination. The cranberry coloring played to Bella's creamy white skin perfectly, and her hair was done up in ringlets, with just a few framing her face giving one perfect access to her neck.

I could feel arousal within me grow and I chastised myself. What was I thinking ogling over her like she was my dinner? But my mind could not stop the direction it was already going in. This was not the Bella people knew. This Bella in front of me was a woman in every sense of the word, and held power over me. In a matter of seconds, I had pictured ten different ways I could take Bella. I mentally shook myself awake. Even as much as I had desired Bella over the past weeks, I usually thought myself enough of a gentleman not to be as crude as to what I just pictured in my head. Bella then did a small twirl, showing off the full skirt on the bottom. "So how do I look?" as she curtsied to me showing her breasts even more. Oh dear Lord, I don't think I am going to make it through this evening.

I answered her honestly as I walked up to her, making the southern drawl a bit thicker than normal. "You are the most beautiful southern belle I have ever laid eyes on."

A blush crept up her face and she looked at me with her eyes soft and sincere. "And you are the most handsome confederate officer I have ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on."

I could have kissed her then. I _should_ have kissed her then. But my stupid mouth asked a question. "So, how did you get my uniform right?"

A playful smile came to Bella's lips. "I did my research on you Mr. Whitlock. I thought it was important that I get the proper rank in the proper unit correct. It looks like the uniform fits well."

It fit perfectly. I said as much.

Bella looked at the clock in our room, noting it was almost six o'clock. "We should probably get going. The ball is about the officially start." She walked to the door. Uncertainty suddenly surrounded Bella. She paused before opening the door and turned to me. "You like this surprise, don't you?"

I enveloped Bella in a hug. "If you only knew how much this meant to me. I love it, Bella. "I very slowly released our embrace and opened the door for her. "Ladies first."

We walked down the large winding staircase to the Ballroom. I was amazed by the authencity of it all. Candles lit the room, giving the room a romantic glow. Servers walked around with beverages, and the couples milled about the room. A quartet was warming up on the stage. This really did take me back to my youth. I smiled inwardly thinking about what people here would think knowing that they had a real confederate soldier in their midst's. Bella walked up to a table and introduced herself. "Isabella Swan and Jasper Whitlock please."

The man, dressed in a confederate uniform as well, glanced down at the list. "Ahh… yes… Miss Swan and Mr. Whitlock. This is your first time at a Civil War reenactment ball?"

"Yes." Bella responded.

The man playfully winked at her. "Well, I am sure the both of you will have a wonderful time. If you have any questions on the etiquette or about the dances, please feel free to seek me out and I will be more than happy to assist both of you. In an hour, we will have several dance masters who will go over the group dances before the actual ball portion of the evening commences. It's nice to see younger people taking a deep interest in our countries history."

Bella smirked as she glanced at me sideways. "Thank you. I think we will be okay though. Jasper here is somewhat of an expert when it comes to the Civil War period." I couldn't help but suppress a laugh. Somewhat of an expert.

The man looked up surprised, eying me up and down. "Well, maybe we will have to talk after you all have had time to enjoy the ball. I am obviously an aficionado myself." He looked at the couple now waiting behind us. "Well, we can catch up later. Enjoy!"

There were servers going around with trays of drinks. Bella grabbed a glass of wine and downed in it in mere seconds. I could feel just a tiny bit of nerves coming off her. I leaned into ear. "Are you okay?"

She jumped slightly, blushing. "Oh, yes. I'll be fine. Just needed something to take off the edge."

We strolled around the room and I took Bella's arm in mine. This reenactment ball was serious business. Everyone was dressed in perfect costume and while the hotel itself had not been around during the civil war, I let my imagination wander and pretend for a moment that I was human again back in the eighteen sixties. I couldn't help but think how Bella was by far the most beautiful woman in the room. She had an air about her, a freshness, that went unparralled by anyone in the vicinity. I could feel that many of the men in the room thought the same thing as well, which did not exactly make me thrilled.

When seven o'clock hit, Bella wanted particularly to pay attention to the dance masters regarding the group dances. The dances they taught were fairly simple in nature, but I found Bella engrossed, watching every step carefully. She smiled at me shyly from time to time, and with each smile my heart soared a bit more. When the quartet finally began to warm up, I turned to Bella, taking my hands in hers, looking into those beautiful chocolate orbs.

"Bella, if I could be bold, I would like to ask you to dance with me and only me this evening. There are a lot of men who are having… shall we say? Amorous thoughts about you, and it will only be a matter of time before your dance card is filled." My voice lowered then, and as much as I tried not to, it had a slight possessive edge to it. "I would like to be selfish and have you all to myself this evening, if that is alright."

Bella's breath caught, not realizing it was causing her breasts to heave slightly. Her voice was softer than usual in its response. "Of course."

I smiled in relief. The idea of someone else touching my Bella... I did not want to think about it.

The first half of the evening was dedicated towards the group dances. I was impressed with Bella. She remembered every step, every move the dance mastered had shown unlike quite a few of the others around us. She had this tremendous grin on her face the entire time, her face flush from the movements. I could feel happiness and accomplishment coming from her. It was so nice to be able to see her so relaxed after the week she had.

But it was other emotion, the one just under the surface, that made me pause with excitement. I could also feel longing as well, which, had I had a beating heart, would have made mine go faster. Throughout every motion, every movement, we never truly took our eyes off each other. An occasional glance at the person in front of us, or Bella at her feet, but our eyes always found one another's again. Whenever there was a stop in the group dancing, Bella would find herself surrounded by men, asking if they could dance with her when the group portion of the evening ended. She would smile graciously at them and politely decline and I would then make my way over to stand next to her as if to emphasize the point.

When the final group dance had ended, the man whom we met in the beginning of the evening spoke up. "We will now begin with the round dances."

I could feel panic well up inside Bella. "What's a round dance? I wasn't taught that!"

I sent a wave of calm to Bella before whispering softly. "It's okay. Just relax. It's just the civil war term for waltzing."

Bella sighed in relief. "Waltzing. Okay, that I can handle."

The music started up again, this time slower. "May I?"

Bella made a slight curtsey. "You may."

I reached for Bella's waist and hand. Something with that simple action changed for me. I suddenly wanted to show Bella I was a man and that I wanted her. I was ready to end all of the games we were playing, end all of our doubts, and let her know I wanted her to be mine and only mine. I grabbed her waist firmly, and pulled her tightly to me, the feel of the silk of the dress against my hand. My hand clutched hers and I looked at her with a burning intensity. Her heart began to race as I led her smoothly around the floor and I could feel her desire begin to strengthen.

"You know, round dances were still fairly scandalous in my human days."

Bella's voice caught. I couldn't help but smile. "Really?"

I tightened my grasp on her waist and whispered. "Really. The idea of two bodies so closely entwined with one another, touching one another so intimately…" I couldn't help but think of Bella and I entwined, her underneath me, wanting me…

A blush found its way to Bella's face, obviously thinking something along the same lines as myself. Lust filled her, then embarrassment as she looked away from my eyes. Never missing a step, I pulled my hand from her waist to her face, turning it gently back to my own so her eyes were looking into mine again, before placing my hand back on her middle. We waltzed around the room just like that, for what could have been minutes, or hours; time seemed to stand still with Bella in my arms like this.

A song finally ended and we paused. While other's switched partners, I still held Bella in my arms, staring into her depths, trying to tell her everything I felt in that moment. Desire was pouring off the both of us in equal parts. It took every fiber of my being not to project that feeling to those around me, lest we wanted a very interesting evening. We were standing next to candlelight when the song had ended, and it encased Bella in a soft glow. For the millionth time that evening, I pondered how it was possible that a creature so lovely could possibly have feeling for me.

I enveloped myself in the emotions that were surrounding Bella, relishing in them. I needed to tell her how I felt now. I wouldn't wait any longer. Another song struck up and as I went to take the first step before pronouncing my love for her, I felt uncertainty suddenly come over her and she abruptly pulled out of my embrace, muttering a quick, "Excuse me" before I saw her leave through French doors out to where the balcony lay. I stood there for a brief moment stunned, before I decided to go after her.

A/N: What is Bella thinking?? LOL. I think that the next chapter is coming from Bella _and_ Jasper's POV.


	23. Chapter 23

A/N: Thanks to everyone for the responses on the past few chapters. You guys are all awesome and I can't believe the great responses. I think the official review for the last chapter was, "You tease!" LOL. Yes, I am. So… this chapter is dedicated to all of you who have had to deal with my teasing for the last 22 chapters.

By the by, this chapter is shorter, but it was always intended to be.

**Bella's POV**

I took a deep breath of the southern night air and my hands rested on the railings. I was literally shaking as I reassessed what I just did. I pushed myself away from Jasper. Oh God, why did I run away from him? Everything had just been so intense. But it was so perfect. He was perfect.

Walking into the hotel room earlier that evening, I had not been prepared for what I had seen. Jasper had been deep in thought when I entered the room. He hadn't even noticed at first, which was very unusual. It's not easy sneaking up on a vampire. I had gazed upon him. He was beautiful like always, but there was something so much more. I was not ready for how handsome he looked in the confederate uniform. He looked so manly, so confident, and I suddenly understood why he was able to climb the ranks so high for one so young. This was a man who was not only charismatic, but a born leader.

Unfortunately, I had to interrupt him from his thoughts and we had headed downstairs. The entire night I had not been able to keep my eyes off of him. I felt myself drawn to him throughout the group dances. When he asked if he could be the only one to dance with me the entire night, I nearly swooned. And then when he waltzed with me…

When Edward had gone to prom with me, I remember thinking that this must be what heaven is like, here in his arms. He held me gently, gliding me along the dance floor. But with Jasper, it was completely different. It wasn't heaven; it was more than that. He held me strongly with confidence. He did not glide me along the floor, he led me across it. I felt not only safe in his arms, but I felt like a woman whose feelings were truly awakening for the first time. I had had no concept of time in his arms; my eyes were lost in his. I tried to tell him everything with my eyes, how much I cared for him. At some point, the music had stopped; I should have pulled away, but I couldn't. I wanted to stay in his arms forever. I decided at that point I would tell him just how I felt; tell him I loved him.

The music had started again, and Jasper's grip started to tighten to pull me into another dance. I saw Jasper's stare intensify, and suddenly, for some unknown reason, I got nervous, uncertainty filling me on if I could really do this. Could I really tell him how I feel? What if I was really wrong on how I thought he felt? And so with a flimsy, "Excuse me", I practically ran away from him, to where I was now.

I was shaken and needed to collect myself. That's all. I looked out at the French Quarter at night. It was quite lovely. I tried to clear my head, to ignore the stupidity that I felt for what I just did. I wanted Jasper. I really wanted him. Right now, I could be telling him just how I feel and instead, I am here, by myself, leaving the man I love out on the dance floor alone.

No. Not alone.

A pair of familiar cold hands wrapped themselves around my waist lightly and pulled me towards their hard chest.

**JASPER'S POV**

I walked up to her, wrapping my hands lightly around her waist. I was not sure why Bella exactly walked away, why she was filled with uncertainty, but I was sure of the what I had felt earlier tonight, earlier today, earlier in the past few weeks. I pulled her towards my chest, letting her small body rest against mine. I brought my lips to her left ear. "Are you okay?"

Bella did not respond verbally, but instead nodded.

I let my hands slowly caress her waist and she leaned deeper into me at the touch. I held her tightly, enjoying the quiet moment. Everything had been very intense this evening, it would help to slow it down just for a moment. I rested my chin on her shoulder, looking out into the darkness. "It's beautiful out here."

"It is."

I turned her around gently, tilting her head up. No more delays. "It's beautiful just like you."

She blushed. I continued. "Bella, I never thought that I would ever feel anything again but pain and sadness after the loss of Alice. Instead, I meet you again, and I find my world upside down. I had expected to be alone and surrounded in sorrow the rest of my existence. I was never so glad to be wrong. You have made me happier than I ever believed possible. I find myself missing you the moment you are out of the room. I think of you constantly, your smile, your intelligence, your humor. I realize that I don't want to be just friends with you; that I _can't_ be just friends with you."

I gazed at her intensely. "Bella, I'm in love with you."

Tears welled in her eyes. "Really?"

I nodded. "Really."

I rested my forehead on hers. She knew she didn't need to say the words. I felt the love she had wash over me like a tidal wave, consuming every fiber of my being. At some point, drizzle began to lightly fall around us, but neither of us paid any mind. Both of us were enjoying the fact that we did not need to hide under the veil of friendship anymore, that we could finally be Jasper and Bella.

"Jasper." Bella whispered softly. "Kiss me. Kiss me please."

I had thought of this moment since I realized my feelings for Bella. I pulled away slightly, cupping her face with both hands, looking in her expectant eyes. "I love you, Isabella Swan."

She smiled. "I love you too, Jasper Whitlock."

I tilted forward, capturing her lips with mine gently. They were warm, wet from the rain and they were perfection. I could feel the blood rushing beneath her lips, her heart pumping wildly in response to my touch. Amazingly, I did not feel the absolute bloodlust that Edward always talked about with Bella, how difficult it was to be in such close proximity when kissing. Instead, I found I wanted more, needed more of her touch.

I deepened the kiss, begging entrance into her mouth. My tongue met hers in a fight for dominance, our kiss becoming more fervent with every passing second. The vampire instinct in me kicked in demanding that I make her mine, take her as my mate. I moved my hands from her face to her hips, pulling her flush to my body. She moaned against me, tightening our embrace, then running her hands along the sides of my body as if trying to feel every inch of me right then and there. I understood that need. My hands began to reach upwards, lightly grazing the outside of her breasts when she pulled away, her eyes dark with need.

"Take me to our room. Now. "

A/N: I did not tease this time! If you liked, review. Hmmm... I wonder what's happening next chapter. ;)


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: I am so glad you all enjoyed the last scene. Apparently, I am still a tease. :) Oh well. I hope everyone enjoys this chapter a lot. Let me know how I did, it's my first time writing a lemon, and I wanted to do it justice. After writing this, I now have a whole new level of respect for people who write Lemons. This was the hardest chapter I have ever had to write in my life. Hope it was worth the wait!

My hands shook as I tried to open the door of the hotel room with my key. Jasper had smiled, his upper body leaning over mine. He paused for a moment, clearly enjoying the effect his body was having on me as I felt yet another wave of desire come over me. He took the card key from my hand, inserting in it effortlessly into the slot. We heard the door open with a click, and my anticipation level began to rise. While I had been with other men while in college, none had the breadth of emotions I felt for the man in front me; would I please him? Would I live up to his expectations? He would certainly have to be gentler to me then he was with Alice. Would that prohibit his pleasure?

My worries were pushed to the side as Jasper opened the door. We both walked in, Jasper going to other side of the room while I closed the door behind us. I took a deep breath, before turning around. I was the one who asked him to come up to the room and between the balcony and the bedroom; I began to lose my nerve. I wanted this man, this vampire in front of me, and now I knew he wanted me just as much. I needed to remember that.

It wasn't difficult. Jasper walked over in three strides to me. He wrapped one arm around my waist tightly. His other hand, however, tenderly caressed my cheek. His lips bent down to my ear, his cool breath on my neck. He whispered seductively, "You really are so lovely. Bella, do you have any idea how difficult you make it for me to be the perfect southern gentleman?"

My knees nearly buckled from the desire he was radiating off. I found the strength to reply, "Then don't be. I'm not looking for the perfect southern gentleman. I am just looking for you."

Jasper emitted a soft growl. He brought his golden eyes to mine. I parted my lips awaiting the feel of his lips on mine again. It never came. Instead, his hand that was on my cheek trailed down my neck, to my collarbone, before resting on my shoulder. The movement left a wake of goosebumps on my skin and my heart raced faster. Never taking his eyes off of mine, his fingers then continued, running gently down my arm slowly, deliberately, until finally his fingers met my own, touching palm to palm lightly. We stood there for a minute, looking at each other this way, touching hands, neither of us moving. With that touch, I could feel his undying love pour into me. I knew in that instant he would never leave me and we would have eternity should fate be so kind. I shivered from the intimacy of it all.

"Jasper." It came out as no more than a soft whisper, a promise, but it was enough to break the trance we had fallen into. His mouth crashed to mine, his lips cold, unyielding, but yet were a perfect fit. I moaned against his kiss, asking more, demanding more.

"My Bella." He moaned back, never fully leaving my lips. I rested my hands on his arms, enjoying the strength of them. I pulled myself closer to him, as close as my dress would allow me to. Jasper's hand rode up the bodice of my dress, his thumbs grazing the bottom of my breasts. I gasped in surprise. I leaned in, encouraging him to touch me further. Jasper willingly complied. His hand cupped my breast through the silk material. I could feel them heave and I wanted nothing more at that moment then for me to out of this restricting material. Jasper must have agreed as he murmured. "This will not do."

He turned my body away from his before pulling my back flush against his chest. His lips kissed up and down my shoulders, before lingering on the nape of my neck. I whimpered at the touch, my hands reaching backwards in desperation to touch his body, failing miserably as I only grazed his thighs, not enough for the true contact I craved. I moved my neck sideways, allowing him better access to my throat, to which he responded by hungrily placing his month on the skin above my quick beating artery. It was a dangerous thing to do; as I was not sure of his total control at the moment, but I did it none the less. I trusted him; if my trust was misplaced I knew that we were too far gone for anything to be done about it.

Luckily for me, Jasper had control for his bloodlust. Jasper hands were making quick work of the ties that held my dress tight to my body. I felt the ball gown fall away from me, leaving me in the cranberry corset and garter set that I wore underneath. Jasper's hands left me then and he stalked around me in a three hundred and sixty degree turn, eying me up and down. I could feel him calming me so I would not feel self concious. He stopped directly in front of me, his eyes dark with need.

He set his hands on my hips, urging me close to him. I moved against him, and felt his need press against my stomach as I kissed him with abandon. Upon feeling him, my own heat traveled lower, pooling between my legs. I wanted all of him, and he was still in his uniform. "Let me undress you," I begged between kisses. I fumbled at the buttons. I silently cursed the confederate army. Why were there so many buttons on a frock coat? With triumph, I finally got the last button undone, pushing his jacket off his body, adding it to the quickly increasing discarded pile on the floor. Jasper disposed of his white shirt underneath as well.

I had seen Jasper shirtless before, but never so up close. Hundreds on crescent shaped scars lined his chest, abdomen, and arms from the days of his newborn training with Maria. I lightly traced his some of his scars with my fingers, followed by my lips. Jasper groaned at the touches, but still looked at me anxiously, awaiting my reaction. I looked up at him, my love reflecting in my eyes. "Beautiful, Jasper. You are so beautiful."

My hands roamed up his chest feeling the hardness of his muscles underneath, the cool of his skin. My hand snaked around his neck, pulling him down for a kiss. My desire was evident. My hands moved to the waistline of his pants, my hands playing with the band before beginning to unbuckle his belt. His hands stilled mine. "Are you sure?"

I smiled up at him. "I've never been surer of anything in my life."

He returned the smile, kissing my lips before lifting me in his arms and placing me on the bed. I kneeled up on the bed to edge where he was still standing. We were now eye to eye. My hands wandered along his arms, and I leaned in to graze my lips to his chest and neck, enjoying the equal footing we now shared. Jasper was undoing his belt, and I grabbed it from him, tossing it lightly to the floor. I unbuttoned the his pants, my eyes taking in the sight as I slowly pulled down the zipper on his pants and pushed them to the floor. I realized that he had not worn underwear this evening. Jasper stood there in all his glory, erect and proud.

Jasper then jumped on the bed, pinning me down, his member hard against my thigh. His kissed down my chest to the top of my breasts that were falling out of the corset; before making his way to the bottom of the lingerie. His lips kissed the edge where the silk met skin, while his hand parted my legs. His lips moved to the inner thigh and I could hardly think, my mind permanently scrambled. Jasper took a deep breath in, inhaling my arousal. "You smell wonderful…I bet you taste just as sweet." With that, his tongue ran along my already soaked thong, emitting a moan out of me.

"Jasper!" I cried as he pushed aside the offending piece of material with his tongue, his finger quickly ripping it in half and tossing aside. His experienced mouth eagerly moved against my nerves, sending waves of pleasure through me as his tongue thrust in me. I grabbed his hair tightly, pushing him closer to my core. I was never so grateful that he did not need to breath in my life. My back arched against him, I could feel myself on the brink of orgasm. I could only manage one word sentences. "Japser! Yes! Please! More!"

Instead of continuing his ministrations as I expected, he stopped. He kissed up my stomach on the corset, to the breasts, and finally his lips on mine. I could taste myself on his lips as I eagerly assaulted his mouth. His hand began to move, and I gasped as his hand took the place of where his mouth was. He rubbed my nub, pinching it lightly. I whimpered against his lips as his fingers paused at the entrance of my core.

"So wet for me," He whispered. He thrust two fingers into me, and I grabbed the sheets of bed, trying in vain to gain control of my emotions. It was a losing battle and I knew it. I thrust myself down to meet his fingers to go deeper, harder, faster. "Do you like how I make you feel, Bella?"

I arched my back at his touch. "Yes. Jasper! I love how you make me feel. I'm so close, so close!" He sent a wave of desire over to me, doubling my own, finally sending me over the edge. I was falling, completely out of control as my emotions went haywire. I came back down from my high, panting wildly. I leaned up, taking his face in my hands, my lips touching his. All I knew is that I wanted to give him the same pleasure he gave me. I reached down to wrap my hand around his very erect member, rubbing in my hands.

Jasper's eyes rolled back, moaning, but still, he stopped me, kissing me gently. I looked at him curiously, my body still flushed from the orgasm. "Don't you want me to touch you?"

Jasper nodded. "More than anything, my Isabella. But I am afraid if you start that, I won't be able to stop, and… I want to make love to you." Suddenly, his touches softened. This was different than just moments ago, instead of urgent and passionate, they were filled with longing and love. He unhooked the garter belt, unhurriedly rolling down the stocking on my left leg, leaving a trail of soft kisses from thigh to foot. He did the same to my right leg, and I felt another pool of wetness gathering in between my thighs at the deliberate movements. He kissed my lips slowly, taking my bottom one into his mouth as he pulled me from the bed into his lap. He held me tightly as he kissed my jaw line, while he slowly unhooked my corset. He pulled it away from me, my body for the first time truly exposed to him.

He took in my body, before gently cupping my left breast in his hand and looking me in the eyes. "Bella, you have to be the most beautiful creature I have ever laid eyes on."With that, his head lowered to my breast, his mouth taking in my nipple. It hardened at his cool touch, and my head leaned back, staring at the ceiling as I enjoyed the feeling his mouth was providing. It was unrushed, and his other hand caressed my other breast freely.

He laid me down again, parting my legs, resting his body in between them. His hand moved a tendril of my hair out of my face. I could feel him waiting at my entrance, which was pulsating from anticipation, waiting for this moment, this touch for all this time. Without realizing it before, I knew I had been waiting my entire life for this moment right here with him. Jasper kissed my lips and simply said, "I love you." before thrusting inside of me.

It was the most amazing feeling I had ever known. Jasper's member throbbed inside of me, pulsating, indicating he was close. I nearly came again with that one thrust. He stopped, calming himself down, his hand finding my own, entwining with mine as he begin to thrust in deeper. His eyes never left mine and I was overcome with the love he gave me. He sent waves of love in its rawest and most pure form to me.

My entire body tingled as he drove deeper into me, my body meeting his thrust for thrust. His hand reached down to my nub, rubbing it, practically sending me over the edge again. His voice was rough with desire. "Cum for me, Bella. I want to see your face as I make you cum. Please my love."

I let go. My body exploded, shaking as he plunged into me, my fingers gripping his back, holding on for dear life. My sweat drenched body collapsed on his as he exploded into me, his body jerking from his own release.

Jasper lowered himself onto me, showering me in kisses. At that moment, we were one entity, basking in the afterglow of our lovemaking. Reluctantly, he rolled off of me, and I immediately missed the completeness I felt with him being inside me. He placed a blanket over the lower part of his body, before wrapping me in his arms. His kissed the top of my head. "Are you okay?"

I smiled into his chest. "I am more than okay. That was amazing." I looked up, caressing his cheek. "You are amazing. So…" I began to ask, my hands playing on his chest. "What do we do now?"

He laughed. "I have a few ideas." And with that, he removed the blanket in between us.

A/N: so… how was it?


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Wow. Thanks for the great responses on the last couple of chapters! I am really happy you are all loving this story so far. I know it's been a while, especially since I spoiled everyone with 3 updates in a week a couple of weeks back while I was on vacation. I have since started a new job so I have been busy. I have this short update and then I anticipate a Bella POV in the next couple of days as it is mostly written. Oh, also someone asked if Bella is getting pregnant with a certain blond vampire's baby. Let's just say Bella is taking the pill for now.**

**JASPER'S POV**

I smiled down at Bella's naked form. She was sound asleep, her arms wrapped around my chest, our rigorous night of lovemaking exhausting her. I had been laying here for several hours, just staring at her, occasionally running my hands through her silky hair or the gentle curve of her waist. She was perfection, even if she did not believe that herself. I had been thinking about the future; our future. I already knew that my relationship with Bella was something special; I wanted her to be with me as long as she wanted it. I hoped she would want it forever.

The question was, would she want forever? She had wanted it with Edward, but she was no longer the naïve eighteen year old that she once was. Back then, it was all about fated lovers and never-ending love. I knew that she had been caught up in the romantic aspect of it all with Edward and was eager to change. She did not think about the consequences of what forever truly meant, the giving up of your human life, never having children, knowing those you had cared about would grow old and die while you stayed young, and last but not least, the eternal bloodlust that she would need to fight every day. She knew better now. It was not a truly romantic notion anymore. I would respect her decision with whatever she decided. However, that was not a conversation for this morning. Maybe in a few weeks, a few months, we could talk about forever. But for now, I wanted to enjoy this, enjoy her, no deep conversations today.

I glanced at the window. The light was coming through it strongly now and I knew with our long road trip ahead of us, we would need to head out sooner than later. I gently moved out from underneath Bella. She then tossed over, mumbling "Jasper" before wrapping her arms around the pillow. I placed more blankets over her to make certain she was warm before I walked over to the phone, glancing over at the menu on the coffee table to order room service. Bella had not really eaten much the night before and she would wake up hungry. As for myself, I would need to hunt when I got back home that night, if I was going to ensure Bella's safety at all times. I was feeling a bit of the bloodlust coming back slightly as it had been a day and a half. Deer could only satisfy me for so long; I would need to make sure I hunted daily at this point. I could never forgive myself if something happened to Bella because I was not vigilant.

Room service had confirmed that it would be approximately twenty five minutes to before her food arrived and I decided it would be best to shower. I turned the water on as hot as it would allow for and closed my eyes, letting the steam fill the room and enjoying the heat. I couldn't help but replay most of the night before in my head. Bella had been so beautiful. It was different being with a human, but it was nonetheless wonderful and had its distinct advantages. I could hear Bella's heart speed up as she neared orgasm. It allowed for me to slow down, prolonging her pleasure before sending her over the edge, making her orgasm stronger. I found that I enjoyed her warmth as well. Her heat was something I had never experienced as a vampire before; not only with her womanhood, but also with her talented mouth. It was exhilarating to be sheathed in it, her tongue making my body react in ways it never had before.

I became hard just thinking of our several sessions we had last night. I wanted that beautiful woman in the other room again, but I did not think Bella would be recovered enough for another round quite yet. I was certain she would be sore and would need time to recover. I decided to quickly take care of myself before the room service arrived so I would hopefully restrain myself.

I sat down, beginning to pack up certain items. When room service did finally arrive, I took the tray, and brought it over to the bed, placing it on the nightstand. I wondered if I should wake her or let her sleep a little longer. The longer I stared, the more I couldn't help myself. I felt the beast inside my stir yet again, and I wanted to take her. We had made love each time last night, but now the vampire was looking for more. I had this unquenchable urge to make Bella realize she was mine, only mine. I longed to know that she wanted me only. I leaned down, removing the blanket that was lying on top of her. I was rewarded with Bella and all of her wonderful softness in front of me. I began peppering her body with light kisses to wake her up. I moved my tongue lazily up her hip bone, then her stomach, and then to the underside of her breast. She began to stir, rolling onto her back, giving me a full view of her body. I took advantage of this motion and straddled her, running my hands up the sides of her waist and grabbing her breasts, enjoying the feel of her nipples hardening beneath me.

"Morning." I whispered roughly into her ear, before tugging on her earlobe with my teeth gently.

Bella moaned at the contact and opened her eyes. I knew she was greeted by eyes that were black with hunger. "Good morning."

"I had room service bring up breakfast for you. I figured you might be hungry after last night, but I am afraid that is going to need to wait while I satisfy a different hunger."

I felt her heart begin to quicken, her arousal beginning to permeate the air, as she just nodded, a small smile on her face. I knew I needed to be careful with her, but my body was demanding a rougher session. I hoped Bella would understand. My hands coarsely assaulted her breasts. I especially enjoyed the gasp from Bella as I felt her nipples hardening further as I pinched them.

"Jasper!" If it was possible, my cock hardened more at the sound of my name falling from her lips as I took her areola in my mouth. My mouth then moved to her neck, wanting to leave a remembrance of this encounter for at least a week. Bella moaned, wrapping her thighs around my waist, her womanhood pressing against my very rigid erection. She was practically dripping from how wet she was.

The vampire inside me roared, noting the flush that overtook her body, the feeling the blood pulsing underneath her skin. Her scent was intoxicating. I did not think I could want her anymore than I did that moment. To think, she was almost Edward's one and only and that somewhere in this world he was still longing for her. The thought of Edward with her was almost enough to send me over the edge. She was mine.

I pulled away slightly, my hands firmly on her waist, positioning myself at her entrance. "Do you want me, Bella?"

She squirmed beneath me, her body flushed with desire. God, she was beautiful. "Yes." She said quietly.

I thrust into her roughly once. She whimpered. "I don't believe you Bella. I said do you want me?" I thrust harder again, before stilling.

"Yes! I want you."

I drove into her. My hands were tight on her waist. "Who is You, Bella?"

Her back arched and her head tilted back. She had one hand on her breast, kneading it while the other desperately held on to my arm trying to steady her. She looked up at me, biting that tempting bottom lip of hers. "You Jasper! I want you! Please!"

"Do you want only me?" She was so tight, so warm.

Bella's eyes were wild. "Only you, Jasper. Only you!" her voice was one of desperation as she craved her own release.

I could feel myself getting close. I grabbed her hair, pulling it fiercely, bringing her eyes to mine. She was mine, not any of the other_ men_ she may have been with, and definitely _not _Edward's. I wanted her to be mine for eternity. I wanted her to know that. "Say my name Bella. You are mine, no one else's. No ones!"

Her eyes softened. "Jasper! Only yours Jasper. I am only yours."

I was overwhelmed with the love I felt then from her and the truth behind her eyes. She meant it. She really did want me and only me. The vampire quieted as I pulled her body onto my lap, never breaking contact with her. Her hair was drenched and her body slick from her sweet smelling sweat. My lips desperately reached for hers, crashing down, as words never could, never would never convey what I felt her.

My hands snaked around her back, holding her body to me, enjoying the feel of her breasts tight against my chest. Her breath was hot on my skin and I found myself plunging deeper into her, screaming her name. Our bodies were as close as two bodies could be; we were one.

Our movements became frantic and I thrust into her twice more, releasing all of myself into her as she clamped down onto me, lost in her own orgasm. I held onto her tightly as she came down from her own high, her breathing still erratic. She pulled away after a few minutes, giving me a gentle kiss before looking into my once again golden eyes. "I want you to know, I am yours, Jasper. For as long as you want me."

I brought my left hand to hers, gently rubbing her ring finger before answering softly. "And what if I wanted forever?"


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Thanks everyone. There is a long A/N at the end, just kind of going over my thought process on this chapter.**

**BELLA POV**

Those words fell from his lips and my breath caught at the promise of what they meant. A life with Jasper. My mind instantly played out my life with this man before me. It was more than I could ever hope for. I waited for the part of my brain that would advise that it was too soon for this. Last night was our first time really together and we were already discussing turning me… how soon before we starting discussing marri-

Wait. He was rubbing my ring finger. Oh my God. Was Jasper proposing? I wasn't sure. Oh God!

My brain couldn't function as I tried to digest this information and tried to figure out what he meant by that one simple action. Apparently, my mouth was not in the mood to cooperate either. The only words that I could manage to squeak out were- "Forever?"

Jasper laughed. He looked perfect in that moment. His eyes danced and without even trying to, he unknowingly dazzled me. "Yes Bella, forever. Marry me."

I knew my heart was pounding a mile a minute. I forced myself to breathe. I tried to think of a single reason I should say no to him. Reasons played in my mind, but none of them mattered. I knew even though this was crazy- no, correction, this was _insane_, I knew what my answer was. If only my mouth would cooperate.

When I still did not respond after a minute, Jasper's face went from elated to dejected. "I'm sorry, Bella. We have just told each other how we feel and here I am talking of forever and marrying you. I hadn't even intended to bring up what your thoughts were on turning until after we had been together for a while, never mind the whole notion of proposing to you! This was foolish. I always think things through, weighing pros and cons, thinking strategy. For the first time ever, I didn't. I just reacted. The moment had just felt right… I had to ask you. I have to be scaring you. This is way too fast."

Thank goodness at that moment, my mouth finally decided to begin functioning again. I looked directly at him. "Jasper, do you feel fear coming off me?"

He paused. "No."

"Tell me, what do you feel coming from me?"

He began to smile again. "All I feel is overwhelming love."

I smiled back, rubbing the hand that was still holding mine. "Good, because that is all I feel. Jasper, as crazy as all this is, I already realize something. One lifetime wouldn't be enough with you. You- me- this." I took my free hand to move it between us. "It feels right. If I had to go through everything again, all the pain I had to experience, just to lead me back to this moment with you, I would in a heartbeat because that is how sure I already am of us. So my answer is- Yes. Yes, Jasper Whitlock, I will marry you."

Jasper kissed my ring finger then, and lowered me down on the bed. He maneuvered his body so it was hovering just mere inches above mine. I gasped as he let me experience just what he was feeling at the moment, the complete bliss and exhilaration that radiated from him, overwhelming me. My eyes began to tear up then, the realization that he would be mine forever finally beginning to sink in.

Jasper's kissed my unshed tears away, and then just stared at me, his eyes never leaving mine. "I promise to make you the happiest woman alive or undead." I giggled and he smiled against my lips. "I promise to respect you." Kiss on the neck. "I promise to cherish each moment I have with you." Kiss on the collarbone. "I promise that you will never regret the decision to marry me." Kiss on my heart. "And finally, I promise to love you with every ounce of who I am, what I am." With that last promise, his lips lingered on mine.

I knew I would never tire of those lips. I leaned in again to touch them again, when sadly my stomach began to rumble, preventing us from progressing further. I pouted as he pulled away, pulling me up with him to sit back on the bed. "You need to eat."

I was going to begin arguing with him, when I suddenly realized how naked I was, and wrapped the blanket around me. Jasper smirked as he put the tray in my lap, laughing at how modest I suddenly became.

"I just realized I just agreed to marry you in the nude. How am I going to tell my parents this story?" I could feel my blush creeping up again.

"I would think your parents would be more concerned about you agreeing to marry someone you have barely dated. The naked part we can always leave out, unless of course, you wanted to leave it in. I think Emmett would appreciate the story." I tried to smack him playfully without dropping the tray.

Jasper easily dodged it and handed me the orange juice. I was famished. I drank the glass of juice before tearing into the eggs and toast on the plate. Chewing, I glanced at the clock on the nightstand and groaned. It was ten twenty-two am. It was late. I wished I could stay another day. I never wanted to leave this room. "We have to get going soon if I am going to get back tonight. I have to work in the morning."

Jasper nodded. I walked over to the bathroom, deciding to step in for a quick shower. I accidently shampooed my hair twice, still reeling from the fact that I was now engaged. I pondered more on how Renee or Charlie would react. Charlie would probably have a coronary when he found out especially where he knew I wasn't seeing anyone two weeks ago. Renee was dead set against getting married young, but I was twenty three years old now and a lot of girls my age were getting married so she might be surprised, but okay. I thought of them at my wedding and smiled. It then dawned on me that I would be turned sooner than later, and I would eventually lose all contact with them. My heart caught in my throat at that. I know had to think about when I wanted to die, essentially. That was a strange thought and I did not know if Jasper and I would agree on when would be appropriate. I got out of the shower, dressing in some comfortable jeans and a tee shirt and walked back out into the room. Jasper had us packed and ready to go.

He walked over to me, embracing me. "Are you okay? I could feel your emotions going haywire in there."

"Jasper," I began, pausing. "Before we leave, can we talk about something quickly?"

Jasper sat down on the couch, his face serious as he pulled me into his lap. "Anything. Second thoughts?"

"No! I just was thinking while I was in the shower. All of this is happening so fast. My feelings for you finally coming to light, then you and me realizing how much we actually love one another, and now engaged? I was bound to find it all overwhelming. I want you to know, I want forever with you. I really do. But… do I want forever tomorrow? Well, that answer is no. Maybe in the next year or so. There would be a lot of stuff I would need to wrap up, a lot of people I would have to say goodbye to. I would also like to get married before I am turned. I can't take that away from my parents. I wouldn't want to change before all of that. Are you okay with that?"

"Bella, if you told me you wanted to wait ten years, I would understand. I did not have the chance to say goodbye to my mother, father, or brothers. I would have given anything for that opportunity. Being turned is not something to be taken lightly and as for a wedding… however you want to do it is fine by me. As long as at the end of the day you are my wife, that is all I care about."

Wife. I could get used to that. "Thank you for being so wonderful." I said as I pulled away to grab our things and leave. I noticed the dress and the uniform were back in their original packages. I lovingly stroked the uniform's package, thinking about how Jasper looked in it. He was so handsome. It was a shame that I had to return it. I am sure that Jasper felt my regret. I just hoped he did not misinterpret it. "Leave the dress and the uniform on the bed. The hotel will have it dry cleaned and returned."

"Why don't we keep them?"

I shook my head sadly. "The cost is too much. I could only afford to rent them."

Jasper picked up the two outfits. "Will you let me buy them? Consider it my way of saying thank you for everything. Besides…" he said, his eyes taking on a more lustful look, "I would really like the chance to take you out of that dress again."

I knew I wanted to see Jasper in that uniform again too. I thought about it for a moment then kissed him lightly. "Okay. But you have been spoiling me entirely too much. Don't get used to it."

"I have a feeling you won't let me."

We walked out of the room, my hand clasped lightly in his. We entered the room yesterday simply as friends wanting more, and left as lovers who had nothing but time.

**Long A/N: I basically wrote two completely different chapters and had to pick which one to publish. The intention was always there for Jasper to imply that he wanted to marry her in the last chapter, but I had never intended to get them engaged in this chapter. As the title states, Slow and Steady. **

**However, once I wrote the last line of the chapter 25, I felt compelled to have them go that inevitable step. Did I worry that it was way too soon for that in their relationship? Yes. But when I wrote both versions of this chapter, one where they got engaged and the other where they just talked about the turning, this was the chapter that felt right and I think will ultimately have more of an emotional impact in the end, so this is the one I published. **

**I also think it is a nice twist in a story that has been all about the steady progression of their relationship, that there are times when one has to give in to a passionate moment and do something rash and unexpected, don't you? Besides, based on the reviews, I think a lot of you were hoping this would happen! :)**

**Thanks as always everyone for continuing this journey with me. ~Jenn**


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: Wow. I have really been on a writing spree this week. I guess that makes up for the past two weeks where there was not a single update! There was a lot of emotion in the past few chapters… hope you enjoy this one. I personally love it! :) Give me some love for getting 3 chapters out in three days!! LOL!!**

**BELLA POV**

We drove home, the highway becoming an endless blur as Jasper navigated masterfully through the traffic. Our countless motorcycle rides had numbed me to the speed. I spent most of the car ride with my hand in his, talking about us and our future life together. We agreed that I would spend the night at his place tonight and he would drive me into work. He knew how I hated navigating the Boston traffic anyways, but more so, neither of us wanted to spend the night apart. Not that we wouldn't be apart for some of it anyways.

I knew he needed to hunt. It had been two days and I can only imagine what the activities of the past twenty four hours had done to his restraint. It wouldn't do for us to take risks, so I as much as I wanted to be bad and do something rather naughty in the car to Jasper while he drove, I stayed in my seat. I could be wicked when he got back.

I looked out the window during one of our stretches of silence, when out of the corner I noticed Jasper smirking to himself.

"What? What's so funny?"

"Nothing. I was just thinking."

"You were laughing."

"No, I wasn't."

"Okay, you were smirking. About what?"

"Well I was wondering… Bella, where did you learn to dance? I remember that you were quite the klutz."

I pretended to be all offended. "You are calling me a klutz?" I crossed my arms and gave a look of astonishment. Unfortunately, I ended up laughing immediately after. I suck as an actress.

I explained to him that a course I had taken back in college forced us to take some group dance lessons, but they were not adequate to teach me a proper waltz, so I had to enlist the help of a friend. I smiled as I remembered those two weeks with Jacob back in Forks. They had been interesting to say the least. I recounted the story to him.

"_Jacob! Come on! You promised!"_

"_Bells, I changed my mind. You can give me a hard time about the call whenever you want. Every day if you want."_

_I dragged the 6 foot 7 male into the studio. "This won't hurt Jacob. Come on, you can fight vampires, but a few teeny weeny dance lessons and you are all wishy washy."_

"_Bella, I don't dance. YOU don't dance. You are the one person I never thought would ever do this to me."_

"_What am I doing to you? This is a dance lesson! It's not like I was a traitor to you or anything!"_

_Jake mumbled. "You might as well be, Bells."_

"_Seriously Jake! Besides, when you eventually marry, won't it be nice to have taken these lessons? You can impress your new wife." I knew I was playing a card he did not know I had, as I was not supposed to know he was planning on proposing to Audrey._

_Jacob grudgingly agreed and mumbled something that sounded very much like, "Bells, you suck."_

"_What? I didn't hear that. For a second I thought you might have said, 'Bells, you suck'. But I know you would never say that about one of your closest friends."_

"_I most certainly would. You suck." I laughed as he stood like a deer in headlights in the studio._

_A man in tight black pants and a bright purple shirt that was buttoned halfway down glided from an office in the studio. "You must be Bella and Jacob! I am Renaldo, your dance instructor. I understand that you want to learn how to waltz."_

_I nodded. "Yes, I have a ball I have to go to in a couple of weeks and have no idea how to dance the waltz."_

_Renaldo smiled, eying Jacob up and down, clearly enjoying the view in front of him. "And you? Will you be escorting her?"_

_Jacob shuffled awkwardly. He was clearly out of his comfort zone. "Hell no. I'm just with her because she made me and I can't keep my big mouth shut."_

_The dance instructor laughed. "Well, not to worry, you and your friend here will be waltzing like experts by the end of the next two weeks."_

_Jacob clearly had not liked the way Renaldo was looking at him. Jake leaned down to whisper in my ear. "Bella, I think Renaldo might have a crush on me. That was not part of the bargin. Can we go now?"_

_It was obvious that the dance instructor did admire Jacob's physique, but it did not deter me. "What?" I asked astonished. "You are crazy and imagining things, Jacob Black. That man was not looking at you at all."_

"_Bella, when did you become an asshole?" I grinned. This was going to be fun._

_The first lesson actually managed to go somewhat well. I only stepped on Jacobs feet a handful of times and Renaldo only managed to *accidently* graze Jacobs butt once. I do have to admit that Jacob was a good sport that first lesson, and I think he enjoyed learning the waltz. He obviously towered over me, which one would think would make it more difficult learning, but he picked up quickly and his werewolf abilities did not make him a half bad dancer either._

_The second and third lesson went pretty much without incident. Yes, Jacob mumbled and complained, but it was much more subdued than the beginning of the first lesson. I was getting better as well and I found I actually enjoyed taking the lessons with Jake. He made me laugh and together we were looking pretty good. I could tell that he was now pleased that he was learning how to dance, he knew it would score points with Audrey. _

_The fourth lesson was where it all went downhill. Jacob walked into the building, his bitching at a minimum. "Only two more lessons, Jake. And then you are free!"_

_Jacob grinned. "Freedom! I am counting on it, Ginger."_

_I raised my eyebrows. "Are you supposed to be Fred Astaire?"_

_He puffed his chest proudly. "You know it."_

_I rolled my eyes. Renaldo walked in then, his shirt unbuttoned lower if at all possible. Why the man even bothered with a shirt, I did not know. He had us start in the middle of the room like usual, one of my hands on Jacobs shoulder and the other clasped firmly in his hand. The music played and it went well at first, until Jacob tried go all Rico Suave on me and twirl me unexpectantly. My feet caught in his and I went sprawling on the floor, hurting my ankle. After yelling a few obscenities at Jacob, I hobbled over to the edge of the dance floor._

_Renaldo came running up to examine the ankle. "Awww… Nothing too bad. Give it a few minutes and you will be back on your feet. Stay there."_

_Jacob walked over to the side. He should have been feeling more guilty in my opinion. "I guess it's break time then."_

_Renaldo looked at him, tisking, shaking his head from side to side. "Not for you. Get in the middle of the room again. I want to make sure that you get the most out of your lessons"_

"_But I will look stupid dancing by myself!"_

_The practically half nake instructor laughed. "You will not be dancing by yourself, silly. I will play Bella."_

_I had never seen anyone look so terrified in their lives. Jake did not know what to do. He just stood there giving me a pleading look. I couldn't help but laugh. "You better get out there, Jake. I paid good money for these lessons."_

_Jacob walked numbly back to middle of the dance floor and Renaldo, almost gleefully, took my place. Jacob had suddenly turned from confident dancer to bumbling idiot as Renaldo kept telling Jacob to "look me in the eyes". He looked miserable. My ankle had felt better after five minutes, but I decided to give it a ten minute rest for good measure. That and I needed a good laugh._

I looked at Jasper who was grinning from my story. "Jacob wouldn't go to the fifth dance lesson with me after that. I had put him through enough and he had more than paid his pentance in my opinion. I think Renaldo was more disappointed than I was that Jake was not there when I showed up by myself that last class."

"You must miss him."

"Jake? Yeah, he is one of my closest friends on this planet. On the outside, he may bitch and complain a lot, but on the inside he is pure goodness."

"How do you think the pack and him will react to us?"

I squeezed Jasper's hand. That particular conversation was not going to pretty, especially about the eventual turning. "I think I may wait awhile to tell him about all this."

He just nodded. "Good thinking."


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: Sorry this took me a bit to come out… I had severe writers block with this chapter… Also, Tarkonta, I did not forget, but I **_**can not**_** find the saved Alternative Chapter anywhere in my laptop… I know I saved it because I pulled a lot of the Jacob scene from it to write that chapter… grrr… once I find it, the alternative chapter is yours for your viewing! Thanks as always everyone for being patient.**

**Jasper's POV**

The next several weeks passed quickly. Bella stayed with me every night, only going back to her apartment occasionally to pick up additional work clothes and necessities. It was the beginning of December, which meant two things; first that Christmas was coming and I wanted to make it extremely special for Bella and secondly, that Edward was making his return trip to the Cullen household in just a couple of weeks. We hadn't discussed my agreement with Carlisle regarding Edward since we had gotten together, but it was a conversation I was planning on having tonight.

It was Friday night, and I roused Bella from her semi-sleep with a light kiss on the lips. "Time to wake up love. Dinner is on the table waiting for you."

She groaned and turned back over on the couch she had fallen asleep on after work. "Don't wanna get up. Eat later."

I kneeled down next to her, watching the subtle rise and fall of her chest. She was already falling into a deeper slumber. I did not have the heart to wake her up. Instead, I grabbed a blanket from the other couch and laid it over her body and put dinner away. She needed the rest; her job had been taking a toll on her these last few weeks. Dinner could wait. I could wait. I had the whole weekend with her. There was no rush. We would soon have an eternity together with her as my wife.

My wife. I smiled at that thought. Three weeks since she said the words that practically made my heart begin beating again. When Bella was at work and I was back from my daily hunting trip, I had found myself often daydreaming about Bella dressed all in white, walking down the aisle to greet me. I smiled as I thought she would be Isabella Whitlock. Alice had never taken my last name. Alice was, first and foremost, a Cullen at heart. I couldn't have faulted my dark haired pixie for that, it was who she was. But a part of me had always longed for her to take my name, my real name, just once, during the four weddings we had had over the years. I remembered before our third wedding during the mid eighties, I produced an "engagement" ring to her.

_Alice and I were out by a river in the middle of a Colorado forest. The sun was shining down after a quick rainstorm. The air was fresh and clean and a double rainbow loomed over the horizon. Alice was sketching a picture of the scene and I just watched her lovingly as she carefully made each stroke. It was rare when my favorite little ball of energy just stopped to relax and enjoy a moment. I moved in front of her, gently taking the sketchbook out of her hands, placing it on the ground. Her golden eyes were shining back at me, filled with love. I took out the ring, positive that she had seen this moment coming. "Alice, please do me the pleasure of becoming Mrs. Alice Whitlock."_

_Alice smiled at me, her small hand caressing my cheek. Regret radiated off of her. "Jasper… I love you more than anything in this world. You love me?"_

"_You know I do."_

"_Then you'll understand when I say that I want to stay a Cullen. They are the only family I have ever known, Jasper. Just know that it does not diminish the love I feel for you. Someday my Jasper, I promise, someday you will get Mrs. Whitlock. Just not now."_

She was right of course, Alice always was. You never bet against her. I would have my Mrs. Whitlock. It just wasn't the way I thought she meant it over two decades ago.

I roused myself from my thoughts and watched the first snowflakes of the season begin to fall outside. I knew Bella would be excited. She was looking forward to her first New England winter. I mentally noted to take her snowmobiling when enough snow was on the ground.

Bella begin to wake from her nap. I walked over to the kitchen and began to reheat her dinner for her. She walked in, her hair slightly disshelved, stretching her arms wide open. "Ahh…That felt good. How long was I out?"

"Around two hours. Feel better?"

She nodded, walking over next to me, laying her head on my chest. "Much better. Dinner ready?"

"Reheating it now. Would you like to eat in the living room by the fire? It's snowing out."

Her eyes widened. "It is? I guess we will get a White Christmas after all."

She gathered her plate and we sat down. I figured now would be a good time to begin our conversation. "Speaking of White Christmases…I was hoping we could talk about just that."

Bella swallowed her bite. "What about Christmas?"

"Well, you told me the other day that your work is shutting down from December twenty-third to January second, correct?"

"Yes, thank goodness!"

I moved over next to her, moving her plate from her lap to the coffee table behind us. I looked into those chocolate eyes I loved. "I was hoping that we could go home for Christmas."

"Home?" She looked a little confused.

"To my home. To the Cullen's to see Carlisle and everyone."

"Wow. If that is what you would like Jasper, I will go with you." I could feel a little unease. I knew what I was going to say next was only going to make it worse.

"Bella, when I went to see Carlisle a month and a half ago, I told him about you and my feelings for you. I told him how I was falling in love with you and how I thought you might feel the same for me. I expected that to be the last time I saw them. Edward was his child first, his first companion, and I figured when he found out that Edward's love of his life was involved with me… well, I figured that the family would side with him and ask me to keep my distance. Instead, Carlisle yet again amazed me with his understanding and compassion and told me that you and I would always be considered family. He had only one request."

Bella squeezed my hand. "What was that?"

"That I tell Edward about us as soon as possible if you felt the same as I did."

"O…kay…"

"Bella, Edward is coming back home for the holidays for the first time in over a year and a half."

Bella let out a big breath she had been holding in. I could feel her heart racing. "Okay, give me a minute here. This is a lot of information to digest." She paused, looking down at the floor. Her fingers lightly started to trace the pattern that was on the area rug. Bella's emotions ranged from everything from shock, to sadness, happiness, to anger. After a few minutes, I felt these emotions lessen although they all simmered beneath the surface still.

Bella looked up at me, the sadness being the first emotion to reach her eyes. "Jasper… I don't know if I can face Edward. I would love to see the rest of the family. I want to see Emmett, and Esme and Carlisle, hell, I would even love to see Rosalie. But Edward? I am over him, you know I am, but he… he broke me for so long Jasper. I mean, I thought I was broken beyond all repair."

A tear ran down her face as she spoke. For a brief moment, the emotions that I was hit with were of tremendous sorrow and loss. I could only compare it to how I felt when I lost Alice. In that moment, it was like I was looking at eighteen year old Bella again. A teenager whose first love had abandoned her and left her with a million questions that she did not know the answers to. This is what she was burdened with when we all left Forks. I felt guilt again at what my brother did to her, even what I did to her. We were all partially responsible for that abandonment. None of us were innocent. We should have known better.

I held her tightly then and said the only thing that I thought was appropriate. "I'm so sorry, Bella."

She let out a small sigh. "It took a couple of years for me to be okay again and then this past summer to really feel free from his spell. It kills me that a part of me desperately wants to see him again."

"Why do you want to see him?"

"Honestly, the old Bella wants to make sure he is okay and alright, and then the grown up Bella wants to yell at him and tell Edward to fuck off for doing what he did."

"Understandable."

She was quiet again and thinking. "You said he loves me still?"

I did not want to admit it, not even to myself. But I told her the truth. "He loves you more than existence itself. As I told Carlisle, this will very close to destroy him, Bella. Even though you have not seen him for almost five and a half years, I think he always thought somehow he would find his way back to you, to your arms. He is still expecting to see the teenage Bella, not the woman you have grown to be. And the fact that you are now with me, when he sacrificed his happiness to protect you… well, this does not paint a pretty picture." I paused. "Bella, if you do not want to go there or see Edward, I completely understand. I will never make you do anything you are not comfortable with."

"I really appreciate that Jasper. But no… I need to see him, I want to see him. He is going to be in my life for eternity as family. He will be my brother-in-law when I marry you. However, I do have two requests."

"Anything."

"First, we see Edward separately. If it is not too much, I think it might be best for you to tell him about us and then when he has calmed down, I can meet up with him. I do not think it is a good idea if we tell him together."

"Agreed." It was what I was hoping for. That first encounter would not be pleasant and I did not want to risk Bella getting hurt physically, never mind emotionally.

"Second, even though we may be in Canada, I want to spend Christmas Eve and Christmas with just you. This is our first Christmas together. There should be no drama on either side until afterwards. Besides, Esme has not seen her son for a long time and she deserves a happy holiday."

"Are you really ready for this?"

"As ready as I will ever be."


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: Thank you everyone for your always encouraging words. Summertime is crazy and I have been trying to find time to write this, my novel, and have a life. ;) I appreciate your infinite patience and I hope you enjoy this chapter. **

**Bella POV**

I stared out the airplane window. The world outside looked just like a Norman Rockwell painting. It was Christmas Eve, and the quaint New England towns I always read about held a soft glow from the lights strung on the houses and trees even miles above the ground. There had been yet another snow storm the night before and they were really going to have the perfect white Christmas.

But Jasper and I would not be part of it. My work had shut down for the holidays and in a few brief hours we would be in Canada to see his family. Jasper had rented a small cottage on the other side of the town that we could settle into for the holiday. He showed me pictures online. It was cozy, not a lot of flash, just perfect for me. Jasper told me he arranged for a decorated tree to be set up for us when we got there.

Jasper had called Carlisle a week ago to give him a heads up that we would be arriving. Carlisle was pleased; he stated he would keep it a secret until December 26th, when he would discreetly tell the family about Jasper and myself, excluding Edward of course. If everything worked out, Jasper and Edward would be alone in the house when he told him.

I worried about the confrontation. The past couple of weeks, my brain had been thinking of the different scenarios of when I saw Edward. Edward declaring his never ending love for me. Edward telling me that he really did never love me. Edward hurting me accidently. Edward seeing me, telling me he killed Jasper and was going to kill me. As I thought more and more about it, the more ridiculous the daydreams got, but I couldn't help but play them over and over in my head. To say I was worried about how he was going to react to this news was an understatement.

Jasper gently tugged on my shirt, bringing me out of my thoughts and back into reality. "Everything alright? You are feeling more and more anxious by the minute."

I looked at my beautiful blond vampire. He sat next to me in first class, rubbing my hand with his fingers soothingly. I took a deep breath and tried to look reassuringly at him. "I'll be okay. Just nerves."

He leaned over, kissing me softly. We spent the rest of flight like that, giving each other gentle touches and caresses, looking into the others eyes. Jasper did not need his talent; he was calming by nature and by the end of the flight I had almost completely forgotten what we were in Canada for. When we got up from our seats after we landed, the flight attendant wished us a happy honeymoon and Merry Christmas, obviously mistaking us for newlyweds. I squeezed Jasper's hand tightly at that; that statement would be true soon enough.

We rented an SUV for our stay and with Jasper driving; we were at our cottage in no time. Jasper opened the door of the SUV for me and we walked to the cottage. I must have gotten five feet into the hallway before my jaw dropped and my breath was taken away.

The cottage was like something out of a Christmas story you are told as a child. The stairwell railing was wrapped tightly in garland and cranberry; the fireplace was crackling from the wood burning inside of it. Its mantle, with garland on it as well, had two stockings hanging from them, both in a simple scroll that said, "Bella" and "Jasper". Flameless candles were lit in every window of the place emitting a soft light throughout the rooms. The plump fir tree stood grandly in the corner of the room, decorated with white lights and red and green decorations. Finally, Bing Crosby's White Christmas played quietly in the background.

I had stopped underneath the entryway to the living room, soaking it all in. I felt Jasper wrap his arms around me, setting his chin on my shoulder. "Too much?" he whispered.

I turned to him with tears brimming in my eyes. "You did all this for me?"

He nodded. "For you." My breath was taken away as I saw the love in his eyes. This was the man I am marrying. This wonderful, thoughtful man.

"Did I ever mention how much I love you?"

"Maybe once or twice." Jasper looked up above us and then looked back down smiling. "Mistletoe."

Our lips met in a gentle kiss. It was sweet. He gave me such a perfect Christmas Eve and this was the perfect way to end the evening before heading to bed.

While it was perfect, I was overcome with the urge that I did not want sweet. I wanted him and I wanted to say thank you for all of this very, very properly. I wrapped my arms tightly around Jasper, deepening the embrace. I let my desire actively overtake me, knowing that Jasper would feel the effects.

He did not disappoint. Our things still in the hallway were quickly forgotten we moved into the living room, our kiss never breaking. Jasper flew me flush against the wall, lifting me so I could wrap my legs around his waist. My body reacted at the hardness of his body pressed up against me, my body longing to be touched in every way by his. Jasper nipped at my neck, his teeth gently scraping my neck careful not to cut. I couldn't help but moan at the action, knowing someday that his bite would bring us together. That thought excited me more and more with each passing day.

His hands moved under my sweater to my waist, his cool fingers touching my fevered skin. Pushing my shirt up, his thumbs grazed my stomach and thinly lace covered breasts during the action, causing me to grind my hips more into his. A low rumble came from the back of Jasper's throat at the contract. "Bella," His voice was guttural. "You need to stop that or else I am not going to be able to control myself."

I smiled at him, arching one eyebrow. I leaned in, my lips touching his ear. In the sexiest voice I could manage, I replied, "The point is, I don't want you controlling yourself. Take me Jasper. Take me now."

Jasper eyes took on a look that I had not seen since the morning he asked me to marry him. It was animalistic, primal, and territorial. Instead of being scared, an excitement rode through me that I could not explain. I wanted every part of him. Without missing a beat, he removed his pants then I felt his right hand slid up my thigh before brushing my center for the briefest of moments, causing the skirt I was wearing to inevitably be hiked higher on my body.

I moaned loudly. Tonight was not a night for sweet lovemaking. I wanted to drive him crazy and be bold, something I had never been in bed before. I leaned back to his ear whispering. "I am yours. You can take me whenever you want, however you want."

"Forever, Bella." It wasn't a request. It was a fact.

"Forever, Jasper." Was my sole reply. I felt his manhood grow harder if possible before he growled loudly and thrust into me roughly. His hands gripped my waist almost painfully as his need took over.

I suddenly felt very confident. Jasper made me this way. Jasper made me feel beautiful in every aspect. He worshipped my body when we made love and he ravished it when we had sex. Tonight, I felt forthright. I wanted sex.

"Harder. Look into my eyes, Jasper. I want to know who is fucking me." I demanded of him. He looked up, his eyes darker than before. I could feel his lust hitting me like a freight train and I could barely breathe I was so overwhelmed by it all. I made a mental note that Jasper enjoyed a more dominant Bella. I met him thrust for thrust, my own colossal needs as great as his. I could feel my back slamming against the wall, but I couldn't bother to care that I might bruise in the morning. My fingers dug deep into his shoulders as moved faster against him, grateful for his cold body keeping my rapidly heating one cooler.

My breath came out in short pants, the sensations he was realizing in me overtaking my upper brain function. All I could muster was- "Jasper… need you…. Need you know….Please…. Please make me cum now." My heart was beating wildly as I clenched around him, my orgasm coming hard and fast. My body clung to his in desperation as I rode my orgasm out. Jasper soon followed and I kissed him with abandon.

Making sure our bodies never parted, he moved us to the couch, laying next me, his hands exploring my body, while I continued my assault with my mouth to his. Finally, I pulled away, giving a small smile, suddenly feeling shy. "I hope that wasn't… inappropriate."

"That was amazing. _You_ are amazing, Isabella Swan."

We then sat just holding one another, watching the lights of the tree twinkle for what seemed like hours. I yawned, the long airplane ride finally getting to me. "I love you."

He smiled and as my eyes shut I heard, "I love you too Bella. Forever."

***

My eyes fluttered open and I was greeted with the Christmas tree in front of me. It was almost dawn. I looked around confused, when I realized that after our lovemaking, we never had made it back to the bedroom. Actually, I realized, I haven't even seen the bedroom yet. Jasper had draped what looked like an old quilt over my body and placed a pillow under my head. The tree had a pile of presents underneath in various colors and sizes. I smiled. Santa had arrived. Well, Jasper had arrived.

I listened for Jasper. There was not a sound in the house. He must have snuck out to go hunting. I was happy that I would have an opportunity to place my presents out and fill up his stocking with the little trinkets I had bought him. I giddily got to work, placing the several major gifts I had purchased under the tree. As I placed them, I noticed that there were the gifts for the all of the Cullen's we had purchased together underneath as well. Jasper had them delivered here.

After I admired my handiwork for a few minutes, I roamed around the cottage to get my bearings, get some pajamas, and go to the bathroom. The cottage was very quaint and I felt right at home here. I rummaged through the kitchen and found that it was stocked. I made a pot of coffee and with warm beverage in hand, padded back down to the living room and wrapped myself back up in the quilt watching the night turn into day.

Jasper walked through the door about an hour after I had settled back in. He was surprised to see me awake.

"Merry Christmas, Jasper."

Jasper sat down next to me on the couch. He kissed me slowly. "Merry Christmas, my Bella."

I pressed my body into his to lean closer. A month a half later and I still practically swoon when he touches me. "Merry Christmas."

Jasper grinned slyly. "You already said that. Well, since you are up, want to open some presents?"

"You bet!" I couldn't wait for Jasper to see what I had bought him and if I was honest with myself, I was more than curious to see what I got."

Jasper and I spent the next hour opening each other's presents. I had bought Jasper a leather jacket for his bike, a book on the civil war, and then what I was most proud of, a framed picture that I had taken several months ago of us.

"It's beautiful. We were so blind weren't we?" Jasper had commented when he looked at it. I had just nodded in response. We had been on one of our bike rides up the Maine coast and I had pulled out my camera taking a picture of us during a break. Jasper's arms were wrapped around my body, his chin resting on my shoulder like he does so often. He was smiling into the camera. I had been leaning against him, my windswept hair all over the place. It wasn't until I came across the picture a couple of weeks ago that I realized how in love we looked even back then. It was amazing that we did not realize how strong our feelings were for the other at that point because it was written all over our faces.

Jasper had bought me a first edition copy of Wuthering Heights which I adored, and a new bike helmet. I stood to clean up our wrapping paper, when Jasper pulled me down onto his lap moving my face to meet his. His eyes were the color of honey at the moment, and I found myself lost in them yet again. "Bella, you mean everything to me and you are my family now. The only regret I have is that I know when I asked you to be my wife, I did not have a ring, and I wanted to remedy that."

Jasper grabbed my left hand and I felt the cool touch of metal slide down my finger. "I saw this ring and I thought of you. It is simple, classic, strong, and beautiful. Everything you are. Please wear this ring."

I looked down, there on my finger now stood a solitaire princess cut diamond on a platinum setting. It could not have been more than a carrot. It was unassuming and completely me. It was perfect. I could feel tears begin to form in my eyes. "Jasper, I love it. Thank you" I threw my arms around him.

After a few minutes, Jasper got up to refill my coffee and a promise to bring me some Danish for breakfast. I couldn't help but stare at the ring and think. When Jasper came back, breakfast pastry in hand, I spoke to him quietly.

"Jasper, do you think Alice…" I paused. "Well, do you think she would have approved?"

Jasper sat cross legged next to me. "I have thought about that a lot Bella. And I really think she would be extremely happy for the both of us."

"I mean, this does not take away what you had with her."

He smiled. "No, it doesn't diminish my love that I had with her in any way. But I never want you to have to compare yourself to her. I can say with complete certainty I love you as much as her."

I couldn't help but return his smile. I was quiet for another moment and then asked a question I had thought about many times in the past couple of months. "Do you think Alice knew? Do you think she knew about us?"

"Honestly? I don't know. Alice was always very certain that you were going to be turned into a vampire. Even after it had been two years and Edward did not plan on returning, she still insisted that was your future. Alice was always very vague when it came to who would turn you. She also indicated that you would be part of the family again and there were a couple of times Alice made comments to me that could be construed that I would find another love. But Alice kept things very close to her chest and sometimes her comments were very cryptic and vague."

I touched his hand lovingly and once I knew he was okay, I then walked over to window, watching the snow fall. I thought about Alice and how much I missed her, I thought about Charlie and Renee, hoping they were having a nice Christmas, I thought about Jacob and Audrey, wondering what they were doing. He did finally propose to her on Thanksgiving and they were planning a spring wedding. I thought about Jasper and how much joy he has brought into my life, and finally, I let myself think about the Cullen's and tomorrow.

Nerves wracked my body and then with the touch of a hand on my arm, there was peace.


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N: I'm back!! Did you miss me? Thank you for all your wonderful reviews (big shout out to TrampVamp who was number 1000- WOW!!) Sorry, this took a couple of weeks to come out. I left my laptop over a friend's house so I was without my story for a week and a half.**

**Jasper POV**

I couldn't help but smile as I caught Bella glancing at the ring that was now on her finger. I had been a bit nervous about giving her it, as we still had not told anyone save Carlisle of our engagement, let alone our relationship.

All that was going to change in a few minutes, however. Bella was going to remain here and lounge around the cottage, while I talked to Edward alone. We had already decided that Carlisle would tell the rest of the family and field their questions. I thought it would be cruel to tell him with them around. I felt that he deserved better.

Bella glanced nervously at the clock on the wall and then at me. It was time to leave. She stood up and gave me a hug. I could feel her nerves radiating off of her, so I did my best to calm them.

"It will be alright. The family still loves you and over time Edward will come to terms with this and I you will even forgive him for leaving you the way he did."

"I know. But I am really worried about his reaction. What if he hurts you?"

I squeezed her tightly and pulled her back to look at her face. "Bella, Edward may have speed on me, but you forget that not only did I have years of Military training, but I was training vampire armies for decades with Maria. Plus, I also have this uncanny ability to calm people down. I have never lost a fight with Edward."

I felt her relax a little under my hands with that last comment. Bella nodded and then kissed me long and hard. She only pulled away when she needed to catch her breath.

"I'll be back as soon as I can, but it may be a while."

"I know. I love you."

I kissed her forehead. "Love you too."

The ride to the Cullen household was quick. I hated the fact the entire family would not be there, but it was the way it had to be. I parked the rental in the driveway, and before I could even open the door, my brother was there with a smile to greet me.

Edward looked very much the same as when I last saw him. He did not age of course, but his eyes held the same continual sadness that I feared would never leave them. Despite that, I could feel a genuine happiness at seeing me, and that brotherly embrace he gave was filled with love.

Edward paused for a minute after the hug, looking at me curiously. I felt disbelief come from him and then stupidity as he muttered. "Impossible." He shook his head and laughed to himself.

"Everything alright?"

He clasped my shoulder as he led us back towards the house. "It's fine, Jasper. Esme just told me that you were coming for the remaining holidays. How have you been?"

"I have been good Edward. How about you?"

"I have been the same as usual. I completed my degree in musical composition a semester early. Oxford was getting tiring for me and I was feeling lonely. I wanted to see our family again."

"Esme and Carlisle must be thrilled. They have missed you a lot, you know."

My brother sat down on the couch and looked up at me. "Esme is over the moon. Carlisle on the other hand… well, I know that he is happy to see me, but he is hiding something. I'm not sure what, but he is blocking thoughts. Rosalie and Emmett are happy to have me back though. They are keeping me distracted."

I choose to ignore the comment on Carlisle and moved on. "So are you planning to go back to high school and start this all over again?"

Edward groaned inwardly. "I would prefer not to, at least not alone. Emmett is enrolled in college and Rosalie is not playing a high school student this time around." Edward looked at me hopefully. "Why don't you come back and we can go together?"

I smiled. I have only gone through the high school circuit twice myself, but I preferred the college system. I understood that high school prolonged the ability for us to stay in one place, especially with Rosalie and Edward looking so young, but I will never understand Edwards's willingness to go through it all for the twentieth time. At least with college you could learn different subjects that you are interested in, instead of the same mundane subjects over and over. "Edward, as much as I would love to hang out with a bunch of students with you, I am staying in Maine. At least for now."

Edward cocked his head slightly. "Why Maine?"

I shrugged my shoulders. I wanted to keep my answers vague and simple. "Because I am happy there."

Edward looked at my appraisingly before speaking. "You do look happy. How are you able to be happy? Everyone in the family has told me of your transformation from the despair from Alice's death to the vampire in front of me now. I was not sure I believed them, even when I saw their thoughts of you, but they were right." Quietly he stated, "Tell me how I can be like that, Jasper. Alice was your everything, your world. When she died, I remember thinking that you just might end your existence yourself. Alice was… your Bella. I want to be happy Jasper. I know it's best for her if I forget about her. Every day I think about her, struggle not to go back to Forks and find her. Tell me how you moved on."

Edward looked so lost. All I wanted to do was console him, give him the answer. But the truth in my salvation could never help him, it will only destroy him.

"You are blocking your thoughts from me, Jasper."

I wasn't going to deny that fact. "Edward, did you know I went back to Forks a few months back?"

Edward stiffened. "No."

I wanted to say all of this as gently as possible. "I ran into Bella while I was there at the house."

He spoke so quietly that I could almost not hear him. "She was at the house? "

"She said she hadn't visited it in years."

"How is she?"

"She is… different, Edward."

Panic immediately overwhelmed Edward. "Is she okay? What happened to her?"

"Edward, she is fine. In fact she is more than fine, she is really good. Bella has just grown up is all. She is not that high school girl you knew anymore. She is a woman. She is confident, funny, and knows what she wants. She is not the damsel in distress that you make her out to be."

He calmed down. "So you saw Bella. Is she married, does she have kids… is she happy?"

I took an unnecessary breath. "Bella is happy, Edward. I can assure you of that."

Relief and pain ran through him. I continued on. "When I saw Bella, she was leaving Forks she was visiting the house one last time before she left. She graduated college and was moving to Boston."

"Bella is in Boston?"

I nodded. "A town called Andover, specifically. When I saw Bella, I had filled her in on what happened with Alice. Needless to say, she was quite upset. She still viewed Alice as her best friend even though it had been years. I had mentioned that I lived in Southern Maine. When I came back to Maine from Forks, we struck up a friendship."

I paused, trying to get a read on Edwards's emotions, but it was tough. He stared at me with a great intensity. "So you are friends with my Bella."

There wasn't an easy way to say this, so I just said it. "Bella and I became very close friends. She helped me get over my grief for Alice, which no one else had come close to doing. Edward, we discovered that our feelings run much deeper than friendship. I am completely in love with her and she is in love with me. We never planned it, never intended it, but it is what it is."

A low growl emitted from Edwards chest and then instead of the strike that I was expecting, a sick twisted laugh came from Edwards lips. He snarled at me. "If I didn't realize that it was her scent that was actually all over you, I would think that this was all some sick twisted joke you were playing on me, _brother._"

Edward stood up and stalked towards me, craziness in his eyes. "Is this what Carlisle had known the entire time? Is this what he was hiding?"

"Yes. I told Carlisle once I realized that I was in love with her because I was worried about how it would affect you. We had a long conversation and we both agreed that it would be best if I tell you in person as soon as possible."

"Oh, I am sure you were worried about me." With that, Edward threw a punch at me, sending me flying across the room, into an end table and the leaving a massive crack against the wall.

I got up and walked towards him. I would not hit Edward unless there was a better reason for it. Edward threw another punch, but this time I blocked it. I sent a wave of calm towards Edward to still him. I couldn't have us destroying the house. If he wanted to fight, we could do it later when we were away from things that were breakable.

"I was worried, Edward. I know how much you love her, what you gave up. I never thought I would find that kind of intense love again, much less with Isabella Swan."

I felt anger and hate bubbling underneath the false calm. I didn't like feeling them, but I had braced myself for the fact that Edward would hate me for a long, long time, if not eternity. What overwhelmed me was the hurt and anguish that he felt.

"I left her to protect her from our kind. I loved her enough to do the unthinkable and leave Bella. I left her specifically because you tried to kill her on her eighteenth birthday. Now what good was that? You are putting her in danger every day you are with her, around her. How are you going to protect her from herself! I did it all for nothing! Nothing! You are a selfish bastard."

"Edward, you left her telling her that you did not love her. You broke her for years; she was a shadow of her former self, until she finally healed on her own. You could have told her the real reason for leaving, the real reason for abandoning her. Instead, you lied to her, thinking it easier instead of thinking about what the lie might do to her. I worked hard after the incident with Bella to obtain a strong control. I think that my control probably parallels yours now. An incident like on her birthday will never happen again. Don't call me a selfish bastard. You were just as selfish back then."

If I thought those words stung, Edwards's next words were worse.

"She loves you because you are a cold embrace, that's all. You remind her of me, even if she does not admit it to herself. Don't even think for a minute Jasper, that she loves you for who you are. Just know that every moment she is kissing you, she has been thinking of me. If she doesn't want to be protected from vampires, fine. I will walk back into her life and remind her who she is a singer to, who is meant to be her mate. Don't forget for one second that it me."

I couldn't help it. Every instinct I had as a vampire kicked in then. She was mine. She loved me and would always. I stood there and did the worst thing I could think of. I assaulted him, not physically, but mentally. Images of my relationship with Bella flew through my head at a harrowing pace.

"_Jasper! Maybe… maybe since I will be living near Boston and you are going to be so close anyways, I was hoping…. I mean, I won't know anyone there…"_

"_A part of me will always love him, just as a part of me will always mourn him. Am I in love with him is probably the better question, and that answer is no. No, I am most definitely not in love with him anymore."_

"_Come back to me." "I will. I promise."_

"_I love you too, Jasper Whitlock."_

"_Who says I want you to be a perfect Gentleman?"_

"_Jasper! Only yours Jasper. I am only yours."_

"_Good, because that is all I feel. Jasper, as crazy as all this is, I already realize something. One lifetime wouldn't be enough with you. You- me- this… It feels right. If I had to go through everything again, all the pain I had to experience, just to lead me back to this moment with you, I would in a heartbeat because that is how sure I already am of us. So my answer is- Yes. Yes, Jasper Whitlock, I will marry you."_

Edward stumbled backwards. Pain roared through his entire body, rendering me almost helpless. He sat there looking at his hands for over an hour. When he finally spoke, he was quiet again, the venom lost in his voice, his voice cracking.

"I love her, Jasper. I love her with all my heart. Even though she wasn't there, she was mine."

I walked over to him. "I know, Edward. I never thought this would happen and we never wanted to hurt you."

"I need to see her. Will she let me see her?"

"She is willing if you want to."

"I do."


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: Thank you all for the great responses. I couldn't view most of them of fanfiction for a while, but I got to read them through my Yahoo email. You all rock. I hope you like this chapter… I know you all felt bad for Edward…. **

**Bella's POV**

I paced around the cottage, nervous. I was going to see Edward after all this time. According to Jasper, Edward had taken the news of our relationship better than expected yesterday, and he wanted to see me. I had no idea what I was going to say to him, but I knew I just needed to say it in private, without Jasper there. Jasper had left about an hour ago, promising to take a walk and then come back in a little bit to check and make sure I was alright. The love I felt for him was tremendous. When I told him I wanted to be alone with Edward to settle things, he never once questioned it and trusted my judgment. He amazed me more and more every day.

I heard a quick knock on the door. When I opened it, there he was. It was like a dream. His bronze colored hair was just as I remembered it, slightly messy but perfect as always. His body leaned against the door frame, and while his eyes were sad, he smiled that crooked smile that I had fallen in love with years ago.

"Hi Bella."

"Hi Edward."

"May I come in?"

I wasn't sure what to say, so I just nodded. Edward moved past me, his body connecting slightly with mine as he brushed by. He looked around awkwardly until I motioned for us to go into the living room. He glided in there and we both stood, there just looking at one another. I don't think either one of us believed that this moment was really here.

Edward was the first one to break the silence. "You cut your hair."

I couldn't help but laugh, even though the laugh was tinged with bitterness. "Seriously? Edward, you haven't seen me in five years and the first thing you comment on is my hair?"

He ran his hand through his own mane and looked down before looking up. When he did his eyes were filled with tears that he would never shed. "I'm sorry Bella. I'm sorry for all of it. I should have never left you. I should have never lied to you." He took a step closer to me. "You were my world, my everything. Bella, I would have died for you. You have to know that. I have imagined this moment, seeing you again since the day I walked out of your life."

I turned away from him. His apologies were appreciated, but I still hung on to my anger. "I don't know if I can ever forgive you."

His voice was broken. He walked over so he was facing me again. "Please Bella. I will do anything to earn your forgiveness. Let me make it up to you."

I looked into his face. "This isn't something you can just make up and all is forgiven. Edward, I'm tired. Tired from years of wanting you, hoping that somehow you would step back into my life again. Do you know how pathetic that was? The first couple of those years I was a zombie. I lost most of my friends, I barely functioned. I feel like I lost the later part of my teenage years because of you. I will never get those back."

"I can try, Bella. Please. I know… I know we can be happy."

I looked at him, amazed. "We? Edward, there is no we."

Edward knelt down in front of me, looking up with pleading eyes. "I love you. I love you with all my heart. I always will."

Even just two years ago, I probably would have fallen to the floor on my knees with him, grateful for those words coming out of his mouth. I had imaged for so long what it was like to kiss those lips just one more time, have him hold me tight and tell me he loves me. If someone had told me back then that I would be here now, ready to reject the boy I had been so positive was my destiny, I would have laughed in their face. I had been sure that there was nothing more perfect than Edward.

But the funny thing is, as I grew up, I realized I did not want perfection. And in truth, I could now see that Edward was not even that perfect to begin with. He had major flaws. He was controlling, consistently underestimated me, and tried to be my knight in shining armor even when I did not want it.

I don't want that knight on the horse. I wanted a man who knew he had imperfections, who treats me like I am a partner, who loves me enough to let me make my own decision. I wanted Jasper.

"I know this is going to come out harsh, and I don't mean it to, but it is the truth. Honestly, it's just too little, too late. I don't love you that way anymore."

Edward spoke flatly. "But you love him."

"Yes, Edward. I love Jasper. I love him with all my heart."

Edward then eyed the diamond that was on my left hand. He reached over and grabbed my hand, staring at the symbol of Jasper and my love. "You should be wearing my ring. We would have been married and we would be happy."

"Edward, if I had been changed back then, maybe we would have. But it's not five years ago." I pushed through my anger and touched his hand in return, hoping in what was a comforting way. "Look, we will always have the time we had together Forks. Nothing can ever take that away. I will always look back on those six months with no regrets. You were my first love."

"You are my only love. If you were not with Jasper…"

I squeezed his hand. "Don't you see? Even if I was not with Jasper, we wouldn't have worked if we came upon each other now. Look at me." I tilted Edwards face up. "I am different. I am not the Bella you knew. Even Peter Pan eventually grew up."

Edward stood back up, a look of determination on his face. "I don't believe that. On the outside, you may look different, you may even act different, but when I looked into your eyes, I saw that the same girl I fell in love with years ago."

"Edward, I assure you I am not."

"How can you be so sure, Bella?"

I was face to face with him. "Because when you abandoned me, I was never the same again."

Edward began to walk around the room. "Don't you think that means something? I may have torn you apart unintentionally, but I can put you back to together. I have been ripped apart too. Together, we can fix each other."

"I don't need fixing. I am just changed. I'm happy, isn't that what is important?"

"You do not have any romantic feelings for me at all?"

I shook my head. "No."

I could see Edwards mind reeling. He finally stopped pacing the room and turned to me, frustration in his voice. "Why do you love him, Bella? You barely know him. Do you know what he is really like? Do you know all the awful things he has done?"

I looked at him eye level. "Edward, I know it all. Every sordid detail."

He persisted. "And you think that you will replace, Alice? I was there for their marriage. I saw the connection those two had. Jasper and Alice loved each other fiercely. Bella, with him you will always be second. You will never be Alice. But with me, I promise you will always be first, always be my true love."

I was not going to let Edward plant any seed of doubt. "I am not looking to be Alice, I am looking for us to be Jasper and Bella. I am happier than I have ever been in my life. Even my time with you, my first love, does not compare to what I feel when I am in his arms. Jasper knows me better than anyone. I feel it deep in my heart that I am meant to be with him for eternity."

Edward was quiet. He looked annoyed. It reminded me of when we were together and he would not understand why I did not agree with everything he thought or did. I knew he felt like he was losing the argument and he was trying to figure out how to get the upper hand, how he could convince me that we should be together.

I walked over to the other side of the room to glance out the window at the falling snow. If he wanted silence, so be it.

Before I knew what was happening, Edward moved quickly against my body, his face inches from mine. He whispered seductively in my ear. "Don't tell me you still don't feel our connection, Isabella."

I turned my head mere milliseconds before he leaned in to kiss my lips and he had to settle for my cheek. "No, Edward. As I told you _before_, I don't feel anything for you anymore. I love Jasper. Now please move."

Edward did not listen. He brought his hand up to my chin, and forced me to look in his eyes that were filled with desperation and darkening by the second. "Is it because I wouldn't touch you Bella? I saw in his head the things he did to you. I saw the way your naked body looked…" He stopped for a moment, grief in his voice before it turned to aggravation. "I was trying to protect you all these years! But obviously, you feel that you don't need protection."

His nose nuzzled into the crook of my neck and he inhaled deeply before turning back to me. His stare began to scare me as the eyes turned almost onyx. This suddenly was not the Edward I knew and had loved all those years ago. My Edward that was there only a few minutes ago was replaced by a cold, calculating vampire. I needed to try to stay as calm as possible.

"I _can_ touch you, Bella." His other hand moved to the bottom of my shirt. I did not move. "I can make you feel more things than he _ever_ will. You are my singer after all."

"Edward, move." I was beginning to shake.

He held me tightly against him. I could feel his erection pressing against my upper thigh. "No, Bella. I am going to give you everything you ever wanted from me. Remember those nights you would beg and plead for me to touch you more, kiss you more?" His lips touched my jaw line with a faint kiss as he murmured. "I can do all of that to you... tonight."

I struggled against him, pushing with all of my force, not that it did anything to him. "Stop it, Edward! Stop it now!"

"Bella, why are you struggling? You love me, you just need to be reminded!" His hand slipped under my shirt then and I felt his cold hands travel upwards. His mouth was on my neck as I flailed against him, panic welling up in me. This was not happening. This couldn't be happening. I felt the front of my bra rip and his hand grasped at my breast. His other hand left my face and slid to the back of my ass pulling me closer to him. "Don't fight this, Bella. You know you want this."

Tears whelmed up in my eyes. The Edward I knew would never do this. His right hand left my breast and was at the hem of my jeans. "Edward, no! Please! Stop! If you love me, st-"

The door was ripped off its hinges then, splintering in a million pieces. Jasper flew up against Edward, eliciting the most fearsome growl I had ever heard coming from his chest, as his hand wrapped around Edwards neck, throwing him through the wall into the bathroom. Jasper was a blur as he moved over to him, punching his face over and over. Edward never had a chance. "If I ever, ever, EVER see you touch Bella again, I will tear you apart and burn you where you stand! You will stay away from her. Do you understand?"

When Edward did not answer, Jasper leaned over him, fury on his face. "I _said _DO YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND?!?!?!"

Edward growled, but knew it was a losing battle and just nodded.

Jasper turned to me, looking me over. "Are you okay?"

I was shaking from it all. Jasper took me into his arms and kissed the top of my head. "I… I think so."

It was suddenly like Edward woke up. Even from where I stood, I could tell his eyes were returning to their normal caramel hue. He stood up shakily, and looked past Jasper, mortification of what he just tried to do coming upon him. "Bella! I am sorry. I am so sorry! I'm a monster. I never meant to do that! I don't know what came over me. I really-"

Jasper punched him in the face again. "Bullshit! Fucking bullshit, Edward! I trusted her with you, she trusted you!"

I touched Jasper's arm. I needed him to calm down. "Jasper. I'll be okay. You arrived in time." I could feel him begin to calm down at my touch. I looked over his shoulder at Edward. "Consider this your warning. I do not want us alone in a room together. Ever. What you just did violated me and if Jasper hadn't came in, I would have either been raped or killed or both. No matter how sorry you are does NOT forgive this, cannot forgive this."

Edward nodded. His eyes had now completely returned to their normal golden color. He looked desperately at me. "Bella…."

Jasper threw him a death glare. "DON'T. Leave now."

When Edward just stood there, Jasper's patience was lost. "I said leave before I change my mind about killing you! Or, I will call Carlisle and Emmett and tell them what happened and that you will not leave. My patience is only so thin."

Edward saw that Jasper meant business and finally left the cottage. Jasper tightened his hold around me. "I am so sorry I was not here earlier. I should have known better. I felt that jealously that was radiating off of him last night on top of his other emotions. Are you really okay?"

I buried my head in his shoulder, sobs coming out. I had been too terrified to really absorb what was happening to me. I thought in my head about Edward ripping my bra and the way he roughly touched me. If Jasper had been just a few minutes later… well, I would have been in much worse shape than I was now. I cried for probably a half an hour when the tears finally began to subside.

"We should go." Jasper whispered. "Let me take you home. Let me take you away from here."

I shook my head. "No. I am not having Edward ruin everything. I am stronger than that. I want to see Carlisle, Esme, and Emmett. Hell, I even want to see Rosalie."

I could see Jasper thinking it over in his head, but he saw the resolve on my face. "Well, I will ask them to come here. I will not have you being in the same room as my… as Edward. Not until you are ready."

I pulled away, rubbing at my bright red eyes. "Thank you."

The next thing we knew, Carlisle was calling on the phone to apologize for Edwards actions. Carlisle "suggested" to Edward that it might be best if he goes away to hunt, so we could visit the Cullen household after all and I would not have to see him. I was going home to my family.

**A/N: Do you feel bad for Edward now? Let me know what you think… **


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

A/N: Hey everyone! Well, I am glad you all loved the last chapter. I got a lot of great responses and I loved seeing everyone's perspectives on the past two chapters. I am not totally pleased with this chapter, put I will never post if I don't do it now. Ebonyeyez, you were right on in your last review. That is exactly what I was trying to convey with the scene with Edward. Unfortunately, FanFiction would not let me reply to your review (or anyone else's for that matter).

Jasper POV

I held onto Bella tightly the entire night after our encounter with Edward. I felt like I should have known better; I knew that Edward wouldn't be able to resolve his feelings for Bella so quickly. But I had never figured that he would try to physically attack her.

When I heard Bella pleading with Edward from outside, I had never moved so fast in my existence. It took every ounce of my humanity not to kill him right then and there. I think if Bella had not been right there with me, I would have. At that moment I felt that Edward did not deserve saving.

I could feel after the attack that he had genuine remorse for what he attempted to do. But that did not make change my feelings. Bella had cried for a while when he had finally left. I let her feel all the emotions that were overcoming her. She would have to deal with the consequences of the attack sooner or later; it would be easier on her if it was sooner.

I had offered for us to go home last night. But as usual, Bella showed her strength by wanting to still see my family. Soon enough, they would be hers as well. Bella and I talked in deep length about what happened with her and Edward.

Bella felt very conflicted; she admitted to me that a tiny part of her felt like she should forgive him. When I had asked her why, Bella stated that the argument on forgiveness is based on three facts.

One, Bella did not know how much of the attack was truly Edward, and how much was the vampiric nature within him. I did admit to her that I had felt genuine regret from Edward as he left.

Two, he was forever stuck at seventeen. While he had a hundred years to mature, part of him would eternally have the emotional bearings of a teenager and never really gain emotional maturity that she had now. He thought that if he gave her the thing she wanted most those years ago, she would take him back.

The third she was reluctant in revealing to me. Finally, I coxed it out of her. Bella argued that if it was more vampiric nature then truly Edward, she would be a hypocrite if she had forgiven me all those years ago so quickly, but she would not forgive Edward.

I listened to her arguments in a relative silence, only reassuring her every once in a while that it was okay that she was feeling this way. This was something Bella would need to reason out for herself and it was not something I could do for her. I could feel the anger that she held knowing that that small part of her even contemplated forgiving him. She was not the least bit okay with what happened. If she did ever decide to forgive him, it would not be anytime soon. Bella knew that she would need to have Edward earn her trust again.

Even with the situation with Edward unresolved, I still couldn't help but smile at that thought of us seeing the rest of the family today. I was interested to see what the reaction of the family was at our news of our relationship and engagement.

Bella and I drove up to the Cullen household. Bella tried to make small talk, but her nerves were getting the best of her and she stared out the window. I pulled over to the side of the road and looked at her. "Bella. If you are not ready for this…"

"No!" Came the quick response. "I'm really alright. I just haven't seen everyone in so long."

"It's going to be just like you never left. I promise. Esme and Carlisle will see to that."

Bella cocked her head slightly. "But what if it isn't? What if the rest of the family does not accept me or accept us? I am different, Jasper. You know that. When Edward comes back, it is going to be awkward to say the least. He has been part of the family since the beginning. Myself, I am a blip on the radar."

"Bella, you may think that you are only a blip on the radar, but you have impacted this family in ways you cannot imagine. They all love you. Even Rosalie. Besides," I placed my hand on her thigh. "Soon enough you will be one of us, forever. And even if your worries had merit, which they don't, you will always have me. Always."

Bella placed her hand on mine. "You're right. Even if they did not accept me, you are what I want. I want to be a Whitlock, not a Cullen."

I leaned over and kissed her gently on her mouth. "I am always right here beside you. Remember that."

"I know."

I pulled away from her and we continued the drive to the house. We walked up to the door, anticipating the reaction of the family. "Ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be."

I knocked on the door. Esme was there to greet us with a large smile. She looked motherly in an apron. The smell of lasagna was wafting through the house. She stood there for a moment, taking in the sight of the human they had left all those years ago.

"Bella." Esme pulled her into a warm hug before pulling her away at arm's length. "Look at you. You are so grown up. I cannot believe that you could get even lovelier then the last time we saw you, but here you are, more stunning than ever. Come in."

She motioned us inside the house. The rest of the family stood in the living room, waiting to catch a glimpse of Bella. They all felt slightly nervous as well. I noticed that the crack that had been in the wall from Edward punching me was already repaired. Esme was an expert in repairing our houses and did it quickly and efficiently.

Bella easily returned Esme's smile. "Thanks Esme. I missed all of you as well."

Carlisle was next in line to greet my fiancé. "Bella, please forgive us for leaving for so abruptly last time. We promise that will not happen again."

I threw my arm over her and looked at her knowingly. I glanced at Carlisle first, then the remainder of the family. "No. It will not. I will never leave her."

Bella leaned in to my touch and looked at me briefly. She touched Carlisle's arm. "Carlisle, I don't blame you or the rest of the family. You did what you thought was best. Besides, I am grateful now that things turned out the way they did."

Emmett budged his way through and wrapped both of us in a bear hug. "Well, I missed you my Bella. I missed having a human friend."

She laughed and eagerly returned his hug. I looked beyond Emmett's shoulder and noticed Rosalie hanging back. Her emotions were mixed and she was a hard read. She seemed angry, annoyed, but concern was her primary emotion. My eyes did not leave hers as she said a simple, "Hello Bella." before leaving the room.

I looked Bella in the eyes. She looked at me and nodded in understanding. Once Emmett released his bear hug, I kissed Bella lightly on the cheek before walking into the kitchen to cut across to the stairwell where Rosalie went.

Before I reached the stairs, I felt Emmett's hand touch my shoulder. "I wouldn't go and disturb Rosalie if I were you."

I looked at him in amazement. "Why not? She was rude."

Emmett leaned against the countertop. "Rosalie has had a difficult twenty four hours."

"Well, that is too bad for her."

Emmett's eyes pleaded with me. "No, really. Jazz, Look at it from her perspective. Rosalie has always been insanely jealous of what Bella has. She is alive. You know Rosie has never really wanted this afterlife. She wanted weddings, babies, and to grow old and die. Remember how happy she was when Edward left Bella? She was happy for Bella. Genuinely happy. Rosie does not think anyone should be cursed with this life. Do you know how often she apologizes to me for being selfish and having me changed?"

"A lot."

He nodded. "So Rosie is angry that yet again, Bella is making the wrong decision to be a part of this family."

"It's not her decision to make, Emmett. She has no right to be angry."

Emmett held his hands up in surrender. "You are preaching to the choir, bro. I'm just telling you how she feels. Then there is the whole Edward situation."

I nodded. "Go on."

"When Edward came back last night, he was really upset. Pacing the room back and forth. Back and forth. Rosalie at first thought that Bella had said something really awful to him and was pissed beyond belief at you and Bella. When Carlisle finally got Edward to tell him what almost happened, Rosalie overheard. She went ballistic, man. Rosie may have issues with Bella and her decisions, but she does like her. Add that to Rosie's last human moments, and I thought Edward was going to be killed right there. I had to hold her back. She called him every name in the book she could think of. She wants nothing to do with Edward at the moment. So right now, Rosie is stuck in between being really pissed at Bella and being really concerned that she had to experience that. Let her come to the both you. She will come around. Once she sees how happy Bella makes you, she will be a lot more willing to forgive. Give her that space. I don't ask for much, do I?"

I shook my head. "No you don't."

Emmett grabbed my arm in brotherly embrace. "Thank you. And by the way, good job. Because, _damn_, Bella is looking hot."

I couldn't help but grin as I made my way back to Bella.

**Bella POV**

Carlisle and Esme sat me down on the couch. It was if I had never left. They made me feel so at ease and loved immediately. I could picture myself back with this family again for eternity. It did not even bother me that Rosalie was not overly friendly. We would have a lot of time to resolve our issues.

Jasper returned from the kitchen and sat down next to me. I leaned into him and smiled looking in his eyes. His eyes reflected pure happiness.

"Thank you." I stated simply.

Jasper looked surprised. "Thank you? For what?"

I kissed him gently. "For bringing me home." I looked at Carlisle, Esme, and Emmett. "You really are, you know. You are my family. As much as these past five years have changed me, I never stopped loving you. From the first day Edward brought me back here, I felt like this is where I was meant to be. There was no way for me to know it wasn't supposed to be with him. I know that this all must be shocking to you. After all, it was always assumed that Edward and I were meant to me, that we were going to be together forever. Trust me when I say, it wasn't as shocking for you as it was for me and Jasper. I had moved on in my life, graduated college, and started a career. I wasn't even looking for a relationship. But then Jasper walked into my life. Please try and understand, we really did start off as friends."

Carlisle interrupted. "Bella-"

Bella held up her hand. "Please let me finish Carlisle. I just really need to say this to all of you. Even though Edward hurt me, I never blamed any of you. When Jasper became my friend, it made me remember how wonderful and special all of you are. It made me remember how much I wanted to be a Cullen. Then, I realized that my feelings for Jasper were much stronger than I ever could have imagined and I realized that I did not want my life without him in it. I will follow wherever Jasper goes, whether he decides he wants to stay in Maine, or if he wants to return here with the family. I guess what I am trying to say, is I will always love and adore my Cullen side of the family."

Esme had unshed tears. Emmett looked like he was about to burst from pride, and Carlisle just leaned over and gave me the biggest hug I could ever imagine. Carlisle, never breaking the hug, quietly said, "You will always be a Cullen, Bella. Just know that."

I smiled at the blond doctor. "Thanks Carlisle. I really appreciate it. I want you all to know though, when I turn eventually, I am keeping my married name of Whitlock forever."

I looked up and saw Rosalie standing there again in the background looking at the scene in front of her. I gave her a tentative smile.

A/N: Next chapter- Rosalie! :)


	33. Chapter 33

A/N: Hope you like this chapter. I really do. I know I am currently taking about a week and a half to post new updates. My head has been filled with ideas for my novel and I making lots of progress on that. Unfortunately, it means that my fan fiction pieces that I love so much are taking longer to write! Love all of you as you are my encouragement not only to write this, but complete my novel. Also, in this story, Edward told Bella a little about Rosalie before he left.

Bella POV

Jasper and I exchanged looks before I turned back to Rosalie. He seemed as surprised as I did that she came back so suddenly, looking almost civil. I thought that now might be my shot to straighten things out with her, to say things that should have been said years ago, when I was with Edward. I stood up, ready to confront the blonde beauty.

I opened my mouth to greet her properly, but she spoke before I could. "Hi Bella." Her eyes shifted to the ground quickly before meeting mine. "Do you think maybe you and I could talk?"

I nodded. Jasper gave me an encouraging smile as I left the room with her. We walked up to the room that her and Emmett occupied and she motioned for me to sit on the bed. Rosalie shifted her body, fidgeting with her hands and her eyes flitted randomly around the room as if distracted. Even though it had been a long time since I saw her, I knew this was very odd behavior for her. I looked at her concerned. "Are you okay?"

The question took her off guard. She looked up quickly at me. "I'm okay." She let out a long sigh. "The question I should be asking is if you are okay."

I raised my eyebrows at her. Rosalie was never concerned with my wellbeing in the past, even when James was after me. I was the nusience that intruded on the sanctuary of her family. "I am fine. Why?"

Rosalie rolled her eyes. Ah. There is the vampire I know and love. Well, know and tolerate. But instead of her usual venom and sarcasm that dripped in her voice, her voice still took on a soft edge. "Because of Edward and what happened last night."

I was surprised at her question and then in the back of my mind, I recalled the story of how Rosalie became a vampire. Edward had been very vague in his descriptions of how and why they were all turned, but I remembered him telling me that Rosalie's had a very violent end in her last hours as a human. When I asked for more details, he simply told me that it was not his story to tell and someday Rosalie would tell me.

In her eyes, I now saw the pain and anger that was lit beneath them. I could have easily mistaken that anger as being directed at me, but I understood. Rosalie stood there as a victim, being vunerable for the very first time in front of me. I knew that this must be hard for her. I closed my eyes for moment, thinking on what I should say.

"Rosalie, thank you for asking. I promise, I will be okay. Jasper got to me before anything really awful could happen to me. If he hadn't…" I let the rest hang in the air.

She nodded. "I'm glad you are okay. It might still haunt you, you know. Later on, at a random moment, you may need someone to talk to. I am not saying that we are friends, not yet, but I am here if you need me for that. Edward did something I never thought him capable of. And while I know that part of it was his demon, it does not excuse it. Because of my human past… I am much more sensitive to all of this than the rest are. Don't get me wrong, all of them think it's awful, but they… they never had to experience that pain first hand."

She sat next to me on the bed. I did something I thought I would never do. I hugged her tightly. "I am here for you too if you ever need it."

She returned the hug for a moment, then pulled away suddenly, her features turning more normal for Rosalie, with an air of arrogance and distaste. "I almost killed him last night for you. I nearly tore him limb from limb."

I couldn't help but smile. "You would have had to fight Jasper for that right you know."

She grinned back. "I could take him."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that. He is tricky."

She cocked her head slightly and looked at me seriously. "You really love him, don't you? Just in the few minutes I have seen you together, I see the love that is there."

I just nodded. She pursed her lips and continued. "It's different when you were with Edward. No offense, but you were this young teenager, and you obsessed over him. Edward could never do any wrong in your eyes. And when he did, you still found ways to excuse it. He treated you like this fragile china doll. I think that is what pissed me off more than anything. You loved each other, but it wasn't a healthy love. With Jasper, it's mutual and you respect each other. I can already see that you have grown up. Still… it doesn't mean I approve of what you are going to do."

Now that we were on somewhat better terms, I needed to show Rosalie that I was a formidable opponent who deserved her respect. It was the only way her and I would ever really move past our issues. I stared her straight in the eye, my voice calm but strong. "I don't need your approval, Rosalie. While I can understand your opinion on why I should stay human, it's just that, your opinion. This is not like when I was with Edward. I never thought about what it meant to become a vampire back then."

I felt my confidence growing and continued. "I want to stay human for a while longer, see my friends and family. This is not a decision I am taking lightly this time around. Yes Rose, I had to think about what it would mean to give up the option of having babies and never growing old. But at the end of the day, I am going to be very selfish. I love Jasper. I want to be with Jasper. For all of time. I know fully what I am giving up but what I am gaining in return is way more than I could have ever dreamed. End of discussion."

"You will-"

I interrupted. Very authoritatively I responded. "I said end of discussion."

Her face hardened, but there was respect there. It was going to be a long road, but I hoped someday Rose and I could really be friends. At least there was a foundation now that we could work off of, and that gave me hope.

Emmett in particular looked relieved when we came back down the stairs and were not completely pissed off at one another. He wrapped his arm around Rosalie and gave her a large kiss on the head, whispering something about how he was proud of his girl.

Jasper then wrapped his arm around me in much the same manner. "We were going to come get you. Your dinner is ready. Even though the rest of us don't eat, Esme is insisting that we all sit at the dining room table for a family dinner."

I smiled warmly at Esme for the gesture. We all sat down as I ate my Lasagna. It was really nice. The boys joked with each other, throwing dinner rolls. Even Carlisle could not help but get swept up in the food fight when Emmett pegged him square in the head. I couldn't help but laugh as Carlisle returned fire. Esme, Rosalie, and I talked about their business in between dodging bread. Those two were doing very well for themselves and it seemed like it was gratifying on both ends.

I still couldn't help but be amazed at the familial love that radiated at the table. This group of immortals loved each other more than most human families ever could. It just confirmed my decision even more that I was making the right choice by turning. I would have forever with this wonderful group in front of me.

We talked until the wee hours of the morning with everyone. At Emmett's insistence, Jasper, Rosalie, and Carlisle were playing a particularly brutal game on the Xbox 360 with him that had been going on for the past hour. I yawned lightly, and Esme handed me a cup of coffee.

I smiled at her gratefully as I took a sip, savoring the flavor. It was the best night I had had since the Ball, and I wasn't ready to end it quite yet. When I was done drinking, she motioned with her hand for me to follow her, and with one last loving look at Jasper high fiving Carlisle after beating Emmett and Rosalie, I stepped in behind her.

Esme led me down the hallway, to a tiny room that was filled with fabric samples and sketches. This must be her creative center where she creates her designs for her clients. It was like looking into a window, seeing part of who Esme was. Her creative side was everywhere here, and as much as she liked being a mother to the others, you could tell this was her passion. I spent a few minutes just looking at the designs, marveling over her talent, when her voice interrupted my thoughts.

"I hope you don't mind me taking you away from the game."

I laughed. "I don't even think they will know I am gone."

"Trust me. Jasper will notice. I am amazed by the capacity the two of you have to love each other." Esme got a faraway look. "The two of you remind me of what Carlisle and I have."

Tears glistened in my eyes. "Thank you, Esme. I only hope we are as happy."

She wrapped me in a hug. "I am so happy to have my daughter back."

The love I have for Esme and all of them is absolutely amazing. I felt a couple of my tears fall. "I love you all so much. You know that."

Esme embraced me tighter. "I love you too, Bella."

We stood there for a moment, enjoying the mother/daughter moment I had never had with her before. I stepped back, rubbing my eyes.

Esme walked over to a small table. Her voice was far away. "I brought you in this room for a reason, Bella. Shortly after we left Forks, Alice handed me a package. She told me not to open it, but told me when I saw you again, to give you this gift."

She opened a small drawer, and shut it quickly. When she turned around, a small blue box was in her hands along with an envelope. "When she had given me this, I knew I would see you again. She wouldn't tell me why she was giving this to me, she only told me under no circumstances was I to tell anyone about this and that I would know when to give this to you. I have never even told Carlisle about this package, even after Alice had passed away. But this is for you."

She handed me the gift. Trembling, I carefully opened up the envelope. There in front of me, was Alice's familiar elegant writing.

_Bella-_

_I know this letter will find you well. By know you know that I have moved on. I am not sure of how it happens myself, or exactly when, but I know it happened. You will always be my best friend and I will always cherish the friendship we had. _

_I also know that by now, you and Jasper are involved and very much in Love. I am happy for the both of you- I love both of you more than I have loved anyone in my life, and it makes me glad to know that two of the people I care for most in this world, will take care of each other and be there for one another. I have known for years that Jasper would fall in Love with someone else eventually, and it was not until recently that I knew it was you. _

_Bella, I am writing you this because I ask that you take care of Jasper. I love him more than words could ever convey. Please love him like I love him. Respect him, cherish him for the amazing qualities that he has, and never forget what an amazing being he really is. Jasper is my world, and now he is yours. I know you will marry and be happy. _

_I love you and I miss you. Know that I am watching you from up above, smiling down at you both._

_Take Care._

_Love always and forever,_

_Alice_

_PS: I know you will love the gift. It will look great on you on your wedding day._

Silent tears rolled down my face as I fell to the floor on my knees. I missed her so much. As I read the letter, I could hear her voice reading it, as if she was right there next to me. I had cried with Jasper many times about the loss of her, but reading this made the heartache fresh and new.

Esme helped me up. She never asked to read the letter, but handed me the box that I dropped. I undid the bow that Alice put on it, and placed it to the side on the table. When I opened the box, it was a set of sapphire studded hair clips. They were beautiful and reminded me completely of Alice.

We both admired the gift for a moment. "Will you be alright, Bella?"

I looked up at my future mother gratefully. "Yes. I just miss her."

She smiled sadly. "We all do. The house will never be quite as bright without her here."

I nodded, knowing she was right. I leaned onto Esme as we walked out of the room to greet the four vampires that were still playing the game on the television. When Jasper looked at me, his smile lit up the room and my heart soared. I made a promise to Alice right then and there that I would always love him the way she wanted me to.

I patted my pants where I had tucked the letter away, knowing that Jasper would want to read it. I just now needed to determine when the moment was right.


	34. Chapter 34

**Jasper POV**

As wonderful as the night was with our family was, when the first light of dawn finally began to appear, I took a nearly comatose Bella back to our cottage. Bella struggled to keep her eyes open, but I couldn't help but ask a few questions myself. "Did you have a nice time?"

She yawned loudly and rubbed her eyes. "This was great. I missed them so much."

I raised my eyebrows. "Where did Esme take you while we were playing the game?"

"Oh!" She blushed and a tiny bit of guilt flowed through her. "She took me to her room where she keeps all her designs. She is so amazing, Jasper. I wish I had an ounce of her talent."

"I could feel your sadness from the other room. I almost came to see what was wrong, but then I felt the love and relief coming from you so I decided to stay with the others. What was that about?"

Bella pursed her lips for a moment in thought, her hands drumming the dashboard absentmindedly.

"Bella?"

She let out a large sigh, but then smiled slightly. "I have something I want to tell you. Now is not the right time though. It's good. I promise, someday soon I will tell you. Just trust me on this."

I could feel how much she wanted to tell me, but I could tell that she was trying to look out for my best interests. I had to admit that I was insanely curious now about what she and Esme discussed. She must have been able to sense my curiosity, and decided to throw me a bone.

"Esme did say that you and I remind her of herself and Carlisle."

I took her hand. "I think that, too. And if there were ever a couple I would want to be like, it would be them."

"Me too."

As wonderful as the night had been, there had been one thought that had been nagging at me all night long. "Bella, I was thinking."

"About what?"

"What would you think about flying to Forks for the last few days of our trip? I was thinking you could see your dad and Jacob."

I tried to make that sound as if I just thought of this. In reality, this had weighed on my mind since we arrived at the Cullen household. Sitting around the dinner table, I realized that Bella would have all of time to forge these relationships. But her time was limited with her real family and friends now. She would be turned and lose connection, and eventually, they would all grow old and die while she stayed forever in her twenties.

I couldn't help but think that I have been selfish with the idea of spending the entire holiday with the Cullen family. I was so wrapped up in keeping my promise to Carlisle about telling Edward, that I had not been thinking how this would be one of her final holidays with her family.

Bella was silent. I thought that I was mistaken in my assumptions. But then a smile so large crept up on her face that I could not help but return it. "I would love that! You really wouldn't mind?"

I pulled her hand to my lips and kissed it, before placing my hand back on the steering wheel. "I wouldn't have suggested it if I did. We have all the time in the world with the Cullens, besides, I think that your dad should meet the man that you are going to marry, don't you?"

She laughed sheepishly. "Yeah, I guess it would be a good time to introduce the two of you. I don't know exactly how I am going to break it to him that I am marrying a member of the Cullen household after all."

"Well luckily, if he gets too upset, I can calm him down."

"Just do it before he brings out the shotgun."

"It wouldn't kill me."

"No, but I would need to do a lot of explaining as to why there was no blood and you were still alive."

"When should we leave?"

I thought about it. Today was the 28th, which would only allow three days before Bella had to return back to work. "I think today, so we get the most time possible."

Bella looked at her watch. "It is 6:30am. It's still a little early to call Charlie without giving him a heart attack. Why don't you book the flight and I can call him a little later on once we have the flight arranged?"

"I can do that."

We pulled up to the cottage. I grimaced at the destroyed living room and downstairs bath as we walked in. Thank goodness that Esme had promised that she would come over before our week was over and fix it like it was brand new again. The owners would never know there was any damage.

Bella was asleep before her head even hit the pillow it seemed. The next flight was at noon, so I let her sleep for several hours as I went hunting and packed our things. There were things that were not resolved with Edward, but they would need to wait. I felt that seeing Bella's family was more important at the moment and truthfully, Edward had made his bed and he needed to lie in it.

I called my family and apologized for the abrupt change in plans, but they understood completely. I had told them that we would see them in just three months; last night we had talked about how two of Bella's friends were getting married within a week of each other and she was in each wedding. The Cullen's had already agreed to make plans to discretely return to Forks for those two weeks, so they could spend time with us as well.

Carlisle, always the practical one, reminded me to please inform the Werewolves that they would be making a short return in early April before leaving. I promised Carlisle I would.

When I finally roused Bella from her sleep to get her ready to leave for the flight, she quickly got up. She made calls to both Charlie and to Jacob on the way to airport, both of whom were thrilled that she was coming home for a few days. I couldn't help but laugh a little when she told her dad she was bringing home the mystery guy she was dating and that he better not be polishing his guns when she shows up with him. Jacob, who already knew who the mystery man was, needed to give a heads up to the other werewolves before our imminent arrival.

We arrived in Forks a few hours later without much fanfare. Bella suggested that we stay at the Cullen household, and I agreed since it was available.

Bella POV

An hour after arriving in Forks, I pulled up to my old home and sat in the driveway for a moment, fiddling with the ring on my left finger. I debated for a minute on whether to take it off or not until I told my father about the engagement, but then I decided that this ring was a symbol of my love for Jasper, and I was not willing to take it off. So ring and all, I hopped out of the rental car and before I could knock on the door, my father had it opened waiting with a large smile on his face.

"Bella."

"Dad." I gave him a big hug and smiled at him. "I know it's late, but Merry Christmas!"

Charlie peered around my body. "So where is Mr. Wonderful?"

I rolled my eyes lovingly at him. "Back where we are staying. I thought I would see you first and then subject him to you later in a couple of hours when we had dinner."

We sat comfortably in the living room. "So how is your arm and shoulder feeling?"

"Good. Hopefully I will be off clerical work by the end of January."

"That's great, Dad! How was your holiday?" I had spoken to him briefly on Christmas but that was it.

"Good, it was spent with Billy, Jacob, and Audrey. I really like that Audrey… you know they are engaged right?"

I nodded happily. "Yep. It's about time too."

Charlie smiled wistfully at me. "I guess Billy and I had always hoped that the two of you would end up together in the end. He is like a son to me."

I smiled, remembering a world long ago when I thought the same thing for the briefest of moments. But I knew now that everything was as it should be. If fate had never had us meet Jasper and Audrey, I am sure we would have gotten married and been happy, but we would have always been missing that special something that we found with our significant others.

"Sorry, Dad. It just wasn't meant to be."

Charlie took a sip of the beer that he had in front of him. "So tell me all about this new guy. You have not even told me his name, so I have not done a background check on him yet."

"Dad."

"What? I have the resources. I use them. I want to make sure my daughter is safe."

I looked down slightly at the floor. "Well, a background check is not necessary."

"Why not, Bella?"

"Well…" I could feel my cheeks becoming flushed. "You already know him… sort of."

Charlie looked at me in surprise. "I do? How would I know someone you met in Massachusetts?"

"I kind of met him right before I moved there and discovered that he lived out there too."

"Who is it?"

I looked at my dad in the eye. "Jasper Hale. But he goes by Jasper Whitlock now."

My dad paused, confusion on his face. After a moment, he realized who that was, and stood up to face me. "Isabella! A Cullen? You got involved with the Cullen family, again?" I could see my dad's anger turn to disappointment then finally turn to concern. "Why would you do that to yourself again? That Edward boy destroyed you for years."

"Exactly dad. Edward did. Jasper had nothing to do with it and was not even involved. I barely knew Jasper back then. It wasn't until I met him a few months ago that we even became friends."

"What are you going to do when you see Edward?"

"I saw him a couple of days ago dad, I am I fine. Just fine. I did not break down or anything. I am completely over him."

He paused for a moment, thinking. "What happened to J…?"

"Jasper, dad. His name is Jasper."

"Right. Right. Jasper. Well, I know that was high school, but wasn't he involved with Alice?"

"Yes. He was."

"Isn't that awkward for you? Since she is part of that family too and you were friends with her?"

I wanted to handle this sensitively. "Dad, Alice passed away almost two years ago."

Charlie was clearly out of his comfort zone. He had liked Alice. "Oh… errr… sorry. I did not know that. That is a shame. She was a lovely girl."

"She was. I miss her."

"So how did you meet Jasper?"

I spent the next twenty minutes going over how I ran into Jasper again. I left out some of the details of course; I did not mention that I had been sneaking over to the old Cullen property for example. But I told him how we became friends and took a lot of road trips together, bonding. I also discussed how over time, we realized that we felt more than friendship. I expressed how much I loved him and how much we were really alike and complimented each other.

My father listened intently to my story. He did not comment very much, but then again, he rarely did. When I sat back after telling him how we have been together since November, he asked a question.

"Are you happy?"

"Happier than I have ever been."

He nodded. "I do want to meet him."

"You will meet him. Tonight. But there is something else I wanted to tell you." Jasper had wanted me to wait until he was here for the next part, but I really thought it was best if I told Charlie the last piece of news in private. I knew my dad.

"Go on."

"Dad, we're engaged."

If I thought Charlie's eyes could bug out more, they would have. I saw his eyes quickly dart to my left hand, where the ring Jasper gave me for Christmas shone proudly. Before he could comment, I quickly stated, "I have not told mom yet."

My father's next words out of his mouth shocked me. "Isabella, are you pregnant? Because if you are marrying him because you are in trouble…"

Now it was my turn for my eyes to pop out of their head. "What? Pregnant?" I began to laugh hysterically since there was no way that could happen. "No! No, Dad. I promise. I am not pregnant!! I promise, I am marrying him because I simply want to marry him."

"When?"

"Ummm… honestly, we have not set a date, Dad. But I was thinking sometime June or July?"

My phone rang before we could continue the conversation. I looked down at the phone but did not recognize the number. I answered it, but no one was on the other end. Weird. Must have been a wrong number. I looked at the time on the cell phone though and realized that if I wanted Charlie to meet Jasper tonight, I would have to pick him up.

I hugged my father, and promised I would be back in a little over an hour. Before I left, my father, who was still trying to cope with the news that was just laid out before him, advised that Billy and Jacob were coming over for dinner with us. I cringed, because I knew that would make the night a lot more interesting. While Jacob would be tolerant, I was not so sure how Billy would react having a vampire in his presence.

I drove to the Cullen household and pulled in the long winding driveway. I was amazed how quickly this seemed like home again. Jasper was standing there on the porch, waiting to greet me. I walked up to him, giving him a long kiss.

"What was that for?" He replied after a few minutes of enjoying my attentions to him.

"Just because I love you." I leaned up and kissed him gently once again. "And because I have a feeling it is going to be a long, long night."


	35. Chapter 35

**A/N: Well, here is the next chapter… I think you will all be pleased to know that I have several future chapters written already which means a few updates will come pretty quickly once I write the next couple of chapters… I anticipate that this story has probably another ten chapters to it, give or take a couple. I originally thought this was only going to be a twenty chapter story, well so much for that! Again, thank you to all the reviewers. You guys all rock and make my day when I read the reviews. I like this chapter a lot and I am really excited about what is coming up in this story. **

**Jasper POV**

As we pulled up to the Swan household, I smiled at Bella in reassurance. Meeting her father was going to be interesting enough, but add to the mix Jacob Black and his father, Billy, well, I was positive I was going to need to use my abilities to defuse the situation.

When we parked, Bella jumped out of the car and immediately ran into Jacobs arms. He hugged her fiercely. The love that was felt between the two of them was intense, and it was extremely difficult to hold back the jealously I was feeling. Jacob had more love for her than I felt with most happily married couples. I felt a low growl come from my chest.

Jacob looked up at me and smirked slightly, tightening his embrace. If it wasn't for the fact that I knew what she felt for me was stronger, and that neither of them had romantic feelings towards each other anymore, I would have been tempted do more than simply growl.

As I closed the vehicle door, a girl of about five foot seven with long brown hair and tanned skin, stood behind Jacob. Bella immediately squealed upon seeing her, releasing Jacob, and enveloping her in a hug and a kiss on the cheek. This must have been Audrey, Jacob's imprint.

I realized I was correct when I saw him look at her; the feelings he had for her eclipsed anything he could ever feel for Bella. The love he had for the woman was so absolute, so complete, that any of the jealously I had harbored in the past minute were gone immediately. I was impressed with his capacity to love two women so much.

I walked up the stairs slowly, ignoring the stench of the werewolf, just taking in the scene before me. Bella reached out for me and immediately grasped my hand possessively. "Jacob, Audrey, this is Jasper."

Audrey immediately held out her hand. "Nice to meet you, Jasper."

Jacob was more reserved, but after a moment stuck out his hand as well. "Jasper."

He clasped my hand in a strong grip, possessiveness overwhelming him. I shook back just as forcefully, but I was going to play nice for Bella. "Nice to meet you, Audrey. Nice to meet you, Jacob. Congratulations on your engagement."

Audrey was positively beaming with pride. "Thank you. And well, we hope you don't mind, but Charlie filled us in your news as well. Congratulations!"

She hugged Bella again. I tried to soak in Audrey's acceptance, but Jacob was anything but. He kept quiet about the engagement, not offering his congratulations. The disapproval he felt was obvious, but then again, you did not need my empathic abilities to sense that. Bella looked at him with frustration. I squeezed her hand in reassurance.

I could sense his concern for Bella, and for that I could not fault him because it was in his nature. He looked at me without saying a word, silently threatening me if I were to hurt Bella. I hoped that eventually we could learn to be civil to one another, for Bella.

"Well, we can't stand out here all night, it's freezing for us mere mortals," she stated, not missing the stare down that Jacob and I seemed to be locked in.

Audrey stepped in and gently pushed Jacob in the door. "Yes, yes, let's get inside before Bella and I freeze to death."

I walked hand in hand with Bella through the front door where we were quickly greeted by her father and Billy Black. Billy looked at me extremely distastefully, while Charlie was evaluating me. I expected those feelings to come from Billy all night long. I focused on Charlie's feelings because his were the ones I cared about most.

Charlie was pensive. Prior to the situation with Edward, he was one of the few people in town that accepted us. But Bella had warned me that his enthusiasm for the Cullen family evaporated when Edward left her so suddenly. Personally, if I was her father, I would have felt the same way.

I could tell on instinct, Charlie wanted to dislike me because of the fact I was a Cullen, but there was a small part of him that still wanted to give me a chance. I leaped on the opportunity, wanting the approval of the father of woman I was going to marry.

"Hello Mr. Swan. It is a pleasure meeting you. I am sure all the news today has come as a shock, and I am sorry you found out so suddenly."

I stuck out my hand. Charlie shook it. "Hello Jasper. Let's get both of you inside. Your hands are freezing. It must be colder out there than I thought."

We were ushered into the living room, where we all settled in for my inquisition. Charlie started off immediately. "So Jasper, how is the rest of your family since they took off so suddenly five years ago?"

Billy stifled a laugh, Bella squeezed my arm. "They are fine sir. They decided that Los Angeles was not for them and they moved up to British Columbia. My father and mother are quite happy there. Carlisle is still a doctor and Esme has started up her own design firm. My sister Rosalie and her husband, Emmett, live with them. "

He next words were ice. "And your other brother?"

"Edward graduated from Oxford just several months. With the exception of a couple of days ago, I had not seen him in over a year and a half."

I decided to cut right to the chase. Charlie seemed like a man who would appreciate that. "Sir, let me assure you. I am not Edward. I will never hurt your daughter the way Edward did. Bella is an amazing woman. The fact that she even wanted me to be her friend after what my brother did just shows what a magnanimous woman she really is. We intended just to be friends; we never thought we would fall in love. It came as a surprise to both of us. But regardless of that, I will love her forever and please know that I will always treat your daughter with the respect that she deserves."

Charlie gave just a hint of smile. It was a start. While Charlie seemed content with the response, I could sense unease coming from the werewolf faction of the room. We then moved on to other various topics, what I did for a living (Bella and I concocted a story about how I wrote a book on the civil war- Jacob had a laugh at that one), have I ever been in trouble with the law, and how close I was with the rest of family besides Edward.

Charlie seemed content with most of the answers given, and his stomach let out a large growl. "Guys, Billy and I are going to pick up some Chinese food for all of us and then we will be back."

"Okay, Dad. We will be fine."

As Billy wheeled out the room, I felt the tension ease slightly. Bella patted me on the shoulder. "Good job. I think Charlie is starting to warm up to you. I can tell that he likes that you are not as stiff as Edward was around him."

She reached down and kissed me gently on the lips, when I deepened the kiss just slightly, I heard Jacob emit a large growl. I turned to him. "Do you have a problem, Jacob?"

"Yes."

I was not going to do this with Bella in the room, or Audrey for that matter. The only way to gain Jacobs respect was to talk vampire to werewolf. "Would you like to take this outside?"

He glared at me. "You know I do."

Bella gave me a warning glance. "I promise. I am only going to talk to him."

After Jacob gave a similar promise to Audrey, we walked out of the house, where he immediately took off in the direction of the woods. I caught up to him easily since he was not phased. When we were sure we were not in hearing distance from Bella and Aubrey, I spoke.

"Tell me what is on your mind, Dog?"

Jacob glared at me. "I think you know. Why the hell can't you Cullen's leave her alone?"

"Jacob, I meant what I said. I never intended on this happening."

Jacob was beginning to shake, and I knew he was getting ready to phase. I sent him a wave of calm, so I could keep my promise to Bella about us just talking. I could tell he resented my using my ability. "Bullshit. You could have stayed away from her."

"No. She needed me just like I needed her."

"You are going to hurt her."

"I will never hurt Bella."

Jacob glared at me. "You know what I mean."

I was hoping to avoid this topic tonight, but I knew it was inevitable. "Turning."

"When are you going to do it? When are you fucking turn her?"

I looked Jacob straight in the eyes. I wouldn't lie to him. To his kind, this was the worst fate imaginable. And since I knew a lot of vampires in my time, I would say he was right when it came to most vampires. But Bella would not be like most, she would be raised like a Cullen, learning how to survive off of animals, not humans. She would still have her humanity.

"We are thinking maybe a year from now, after we are married. The date is entirely up to Bella and it is her choice. Bella wants to spend time with her family and friends before she is turned and say goodbye, so there is not a date set in stone. It's when she is ready."

I expected Jacob to phase at that moment despite my attempts to calm him. Instead, I was shocked to find that I was overcome with grief as I witnessed the werewolf fall to the forest floor on his knees, weeping into his hands. Jacob looked up at me.

"I failed her. I loved Bells with all my heart, all my soul. And it wasn't enough. Charlie doesn't know it, but I am just as bad as your leech brother was. I imprinted on someone else after I swore to her that I would never hurt her. She came to me, ready to love me, and I fucking destroyed her again with the news I imprinted!"

He spat out the last word as if it was dirty. "If I hadn't imprinted, her and I would be married with a child by now. Instead, I have to sit by and watch her be in love with someone else. And what is worse is that someone that is going to end her life."

"She is going to have eternal life, Jacob. She will never grow old, never get sick. I am going to make sure that she never preys on humans, I am going to make sure she keeps her humanity."

Jacob was quiet as he thought that over. "She is going to become my mortal enemy. My Bells. My first love. My enemy."

"It does not have to be that way."

Jacob did not answer to that comment. Instead he responded with, "It took me forever to propose to Audrey. I love her more than I could have ever have hoped to love another person, but I never got over the fact that I wanted my imprint to be Bella. Before Bella moved to Boston, I considered doing the unthinkable for a werewolf. I considered breaking up with Audrey and moving to Boston with her. My heart would have been ripped apart, but I would have been with the person that I wanted all along. I patched Bella up when there was no hope, and I figured she could have done the same for me."

I couldn't help but be curious. Imprinting is so finite, that the fact he even contemplated this floored me. At this point, there was no maliciousness in his voice, no contempt, just sorrow. "Why didn't you follow her? And why did you propose to Audrey?"

"I wasn't strong enough. I realized I couldn't fight it anymore. Audrey has been there for me in every way imaginable. She accepts who I am just as much as Bella has. I couldn't do that to a second person. As much as I wanted to be, I could not be that selfish."

"Jacob, you cannot stop fate."

He ran his hand through his medium length mane. "Fate should not determine who you love."

"No, it shouldn't. But it does and we need to accept that."

Jacob stood up and leaned against a tree. "I don't blame you for loving her. I may hate your kind, but even I know she could do a lot worse than a vegetarian vamp. I just don't want her to be one of you."

"Jacob, let's say if you were to live forever, and you had the opportunity to have Audrey with you for that entire existence, wouldn't you?"

Jacob did not answer, but I knew his silence was a yes.

"Jacob, I will love her forever. I already know this. There is nothing more important in this world to me than her. If I had to die to save her, I would. She is my world now. And if you still want to be part of her life after she is turned, you can be. In fact, knowing Bella, I bet she would not even notice your smell."

"I am not the one who smells."

I grinned. "I would not be so sure of that."

We began to walk back to the house. Jacob turned to look at me. "You know, for a leech you really are not half bad."

"And for a dog, you are not nearly as annoying as the rest of them."

"Truce?"

"Truce."

We walked back, just in time for the return of Billy and Charlie. It was time for round two of my interrogation. Luckily, I think I may have gained one more possible ally.


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N: I was originally going to have Bella's and Jasper's POV be two separate chapters, but I decided to put them together. Let me know what you think. Also, this chapter is dedicated to my husband who told me last night that he really wants to see a New Moon midnight showing. I know he secretly loves this series as much as I do.**

**Bella POV:**

The rest of the evening with Charlie was fairly uneventful. To say that I was surprised when Jacob and Jasper came back and had not killed each other was an understatement. I had fully expected them to be at each other's throats. Instead, they were civil to each other and even cracked a couple of jokes to each other during the remainder of the evening.

Audrey and I had spent the time they were gone talking about Jasper and what he meant to me. While she fully supported the pack, she was conflicted because she wanted to support me as well. From the brief encounter she had with Jasper, she liked him and could tell that we cared for each other. She had expressed concerns, however.

"_Bella-" Audrey's voice was hesitant._

"_What's up?"_

"_Well… I really am happy for you and all, but what about after the wedding?"_

_I cocked up my eyebrow. "What do you mean, after the wedding?"_

"_You know…." She looked at her hands. "I mean… are you going to let him…. Turn you?"_

_Audrey's voice was barely a whisper as she looked back up at me. I looked at her. "Yes, I am."_

_I was expecting an argument. Instead, she got up from her seat over to me and gave me a hug. "I am going to miss you."_

"_I will miss you, too." As I returned her hug, I suddenly thought to myself, why does this have to be goodbye? They are already aware of the vampire world. With Jasper's help, if I can gain control quickly, I can still see Jacob and Audrey after a year or two. It does not have to be goodbye. "You will see me again. Even after I turn. I will work hard to gain control. I don't want to lose your friendship." _

_She gave me a small smile, but I knew she thought I was reaching foolishly for the stars._

Billy ended up being quite tolerable in between the vicious looks he was throwing Jasper's way when Charlie was not looking. It helped tremendously that Charlie was ignorant of what Jasper truly was, as it limited Billy to only making a few snide remarks now and again.

I could tell that Charlie was warming up towards Jasper by the end of the three day visit. I knew this because he asked Jasper midway through the visit to stop calling him Sir, and start calling him Charlie. I smiled when he finally said that. He and I were able to have some father/daughter time, just like the old days and he confessed that he liked Jasper more than my other boyfriends I had in the past, with the exception of Jacob, of course.

While we were there, I also got an opportunity to begin planning my wedding. Jasper and I had decided to get married in Forks. We wanted it to be a simple affair, nothing but a few friends and family. We had set a June wedding.

Audrey had insisted that we go dress shopping since I needed to try on my bridesmaid dress anyways. We went to this small boutique and after only four tries, I found the perfect dress. I think the dress would have even had Alice's approval.

We flew back home, and the winter snow turned into spring showers before we knew it. We were officially into mid April at this point. In January I had made the decision to quit my job. As much as I liked earning my own money, I enjoyed spending time with Jasper more. I had also made the decision to move out of my apartment since I was barely there anyways. When I had made the suggestion to Jasper, I swear he smiled for a full day straight.

My mother had been over the moon when she heard I was engaged. She immediately flew up on a whim to meet Jasper. Jasper did not know what to do. My mother felt emotions more rapidly than I did and it was overwhelming on him. After the whirlwind that was Renee passed through, we had some downtime to ourselves, which we cherished. I began writing a book, deciding I wanted to be on the other side of the publishing business instead.

I could not believe that more than three and a half months had passed and we were leaving for Washington again. I was excited for two upcoming weddings I was in. The first weekend was Angela's wedding to Ben and the second weekend was Jacob's wedding to Audrey. Jasper was going to attend the first wedding, but was not attending Jacob's.

The wedding was located in La Push, and per the treaty, Jasper could not walk on reservation land. The pack would not make an exception, not even for the blessed event. Jasper and I understood, although I did have to admit that I was a little disappointed.

It was also the second year anniversary of Alice's passing. I knew what this meant to him. He had been so worried that I would take offense that he wanted to go leave Forks for several days and go alone to her grave.

I still had the letter that Alice had left for me tucked away safely. My plan was to give it to him the day before when he left and ask him to read it when he was there. It seemed appropriate that he read it there, almost like Alice was with him. I only hope that he gets as much comfort from it as I did.

The Cullen household was bursting with excitement when Jasper and I arrived back at Forks. It had been three and a half months since we had seen the family, but Jasper and I had been talking to them on a regular basis. Esme and I had become particularly close; I talked to her at least twice a week. When we dropped our bags off in the foyer, everyone had hustled in to greet us, with the exception of one person I had not spoken to since December, Edward_. _

Edward stood back, just watching the rest of the family. Jasper and I had been told ahead of time that Edward would be joining them with our consent. After careful consideration, we agreed. Like it or not, he was part of the family. Jasper walked up to Edward after saying his hellos. I spied out of the corner of my eye to witness the exchange. I noticed I was not the only one.

Jasper stuck out his hand. Edward looked at him, the guilt from his previous actions evident before shaking his hand.

"I am willing to try to move past what happened in December if you are, Edward."

Edward looked at him like he had three heads. "I don't deserve a second chance, Jasper."

Jasper agreed. "No, you don't. But you are family, so you get one regardless. Just don't fuck it up or else I will kill you. And the rule about Bella and you not being alone in the same room is still in effect. Until Bella is ready, even if it is one thousand years from now, you are to leave immediately if everyone else is. Understand?"

"Thank you."

Edwards golden eyes locked on mine at that point and I quickly looked away, gathering my bags and bringing them up to the room that was now Jasper and mine. I was unpacking my things and putting them in the bureau when Jasper walked in behind me.

"Are you okay?"

I tucked a shirt in the drawer. "I'll be fine."

"You are not fine."

I closed the drawer with a little more force than I should. I swallowed hard. "Look, I know we discussed Edward prior to leaving Maine. And I know I said I was okay with giving him a second chance. But I think I need a little more time. I don't think I am ready to talk to him yet, not directly."

Jasper grabbed my hand and squeezed it. "Isabella, you speak to him whenever you are ready. No rush."

I had also felt bad because I had kept from Jasper the calls that Edward had been making. At first, I thought they were just wrong numbers, but they were coming in every couple of weeks. Every time, I would answer someone would stay on the line for a few minutes and hang up. I had secretly been hoping that by Jasper giving him a second chance, he would stop the phone calls once and for all.

The next week flew by quickly in haze of bridal showers, dress fittings, and bachelorette parties (the family was quite amused when I came stumbling through the door at three in the morning singing Sweet Caroline at the top of my lungs before promptly passing out on top of the stairs). Before I knew it, it was the morning of Angela's wedding.

The wedding was beautiful. Angela and Ben were the epitome of happiness and I spent the entire day daydreaming about my own wedding day in less than two months. It seemed like the entire town of Forks had been invited to the affair; completely the opposite of what I pictured for her wedding, but apparently Ben's mother was a little overbearing in the process and had control over the guest list. Jasper had told me that it was not fair that I looked more beautiful than the bride.

I was just as busy the following week. I noticed as it got closer and closer to Jacob's wedding and the anniversary of Alice's death, Jasper became quieter and more reserved. I guess I should have expected that. Thursday night was our final evening together and I made sure that I had completely to myself, so I could talk to Jasper.

I led him out to the garden and we sat on a bench. I just took his hand in mine as I tilted my head upwards to stare at stars twinkling down from above me. It was a few minutes before I turned my attention my fiancé.

"You have been quiet these past three days."

Jasper was still staring at the stars. "That obvious, huh?"

"What's on your mind?"

His lips pursed slightly. "Honestly?"

"Honestly."

"Alice."

"I figured. Are you okay? I know this has to be hard."

He looked at me. "It is and it isn't. I am carrying this guilt around about moving on. The closer it gets to the anniversary, the guiltier I feel. Of course, it does not help that Edward is the walking poster child for remorse at the moment either."

I smiled slightly. For the past two weeks, whenever I was in the room, Edward hung in the back of it, just observing, not really taking part in whatever was going on. When he did not think I was paying attention, his eyes inevitably lingered on me. I could feel his stare as he did that, I usually left the room shortly thereafter. I still had not gotten up the nerve to speak to him yet.

"Well, at least you are leaving in tomorrow. I think you will feel better when you visit her. Just talk to her, tell her everything you are feeling. Tell her how much you miss her."

"I also feel bad about leaving you. Are you going to be okay while I am gone?"

I knew he was asking about Edward. "I will be fine. Scout's honor."

"I did not know you were a scout."

I grinned. "I wasn't."

**Jasper's POV- Next Morning, Dawn**

I held Bella in my arms, relishing the warmth she let off. I pressed my forehead to hers, before kissing her softly. "I love you."

She smiled against my lips. "I love you too. I miss you already."

"I will be back before you know it. It's only three days."

"I know."

"But…." I smiled in return and whispered. "I miss you too already." I felt Bella slip something into my pocket. "What's this?"

"Something Esme gave me last December. I would like you to read it when you are at Alice's grave. No sooner and no peeking. Promise me?"

"I promise." We kissed one more time, in a kiss that would have left me breathless if I needed air. "Be good, Bella."

"Aren't I always??"

I laughed as I got into the car. It was going to be difficult being away from Bella, but I felt that by visiting Alice's grave alone I might be able to obtain the final closure I wanted. My goal was to say my final peace to Alice before I walked down the aisle.

The flight was uneventful. I went hunting that first day, roaming through the woods, letting my demon take over. I felt freer than I had since Alice had passed away; I knew that Bella was a huge part of that. I let myself relish in the hunt, choosing difficult prey rather than the quick kill that I usually preferred. I bagged several animals, when I finally quenched my thirst.

When I finally returned to the empty Cullen house where Alice, myself, and the others lived it was close to dawn. I took a long shower and walked into the bedroom. I grabbed from my closet one of the outfits that Alice had picked out for me, I hoped that she would still approve, but I was not sure as the outfit was two years old and could be out of style. I smiled to myself, imagining Alice chastising me for wearing something that was so last year's fashion.

I picked up the cell phone. It was eight am, and it was still too early for call to Bella so I left her a text.

"_Made it here safely. Have fun at the wedding. I will see you tomorrow. Love you. –Jasper"_

I left the house and drove to the cemetery. The graveyard we choose to have her buried in was beautiful. There were tall Oak trees lining the entrance and the dirt paths. Alice herself was buried towards the very back of the cemetery, down a long lane. We had paid extra money to have her buried with several empty plots on either side. We had given the town a generous donation to plant wild roses all along the pathways.

I genuinely think Alice would have liked it. I walked slowly, even by human standards, to her grave. I bowed my head when I reached her final resting place. I missed my pixie. My mind recalled our first meeting in the diner, when we met the Cullen's, and all the different adventures we had over the years. And there were a lot of them. I smiled, knowing that Alice had remembered those as fondly as I had. I suddenly felt a tremendous amount of guilt over my feelings for Bella. Would she forgive me? Vampires typically only had one mate for all their existence, and here I was going to have two?

I knelt down next to her stone, caressing it as if it were Alice herself. "I am so sorry, Alice. I will never stop loving you, ever. But…" my voice cracked. "I love her so much. I never thought I could love someone else the way I love you, but I do. Where you and I were opposites in so many ways, Bella complements and understands me in a way I never thought anyone could. She makes me happy, Alice. Bella is amazing, but then again, you always knew that, didn't you?"

I reached for the envelope that Bella had given to me. The scroll on the outside of the envelope stopped me dead in my tracks. Where did Bella get this from? My hands actually shook as I removed the letter from the envelope, anxious to see what was written inside.

_Bella-_

_I know this letter will find you well. By know you know that I have moved on. I am not sure of how it happens myself, or exactly when, but I know it happened. You will always be my best friend and I will always cherish the friendship we had. _

_I also know that by now, you and Jasper are involved and very much in Love. I am happy for the both of you- I love both of you more than I have loved anyone in my life, and it makes me glad to know that two of the people I care for most in this world, will take care of each other and be there for one another. I have known for years that Jasper would fall in Love with someone else eventually, and it was not until recently that I knew it was you. _

_Bella, I am writing you this because I ask that you take care of Jasper. I love him more than words could ever convey. Please love him like I love him. Respect him, cherish him for the amazing qualities that he has, and never forget what an amazing being he really is. Jasper is my world, and now he is yours. I know you will marry and be happy. _

_I love you and I miss you. Know that I am watching you from up above, smiling down at you both._

_Take Care._

_Love always and forever,_

_Alice_

_PS: I know you will love the gift. It will look great on you on your wedding day._

I read the letter over four times before looking up at the stone, relishing Alice's final words. "You say I am amazing, but you are more amazing that I can ever hope to be. You knew. You knew I would fall in love with Bella."

Only Alice would find a way to still manage to astound me two years after she died. This explained so much in those last several years with her. There were so many times that I would feel extremely strong emotions coming from her, and when I asked why she was feeling that way, she would shake her head, and state she could not tell me, only that it would change things if she did.

My heart leapt as I now had proof that she accepted us and wanted Bella and myself to be happy and content. This was what I knew I needed for final closure. I could now marry my Bella with a clear conscious and know that Alice would really be okay with it.

If I could have wept, I would have for so many things in that moment. I wanted to see Bella more than anything, and share my joy with her. I decided that was going to go home early and surprise her. As I stood to leave, I paused, realizing I was being watched.

It couldn't be.

Under the Garry Oak Tree, there she stood, a figure I thought I would never see again.


	37. Chapter 37

**A/N: Over 500 people have marked this as a favorite story. All I have to say is Wow!! You guys rock! When I started this story, I thought I was going to be lucky if I got 100 reviews! The next two chapters are Bella so hold on to your hats!! Also, the next chapter almost done, so I may be able to post it tomorrow night. :)**

**Bella POV:**

I watched Jasper leave in his car for the airport. Three days. It was the longest we had been apart in months. I turned back to the Cullen house. Months ago it had been more overgrown, and now it looked like they had never left. I looked up quickly at a second story window, and saw the curtain suddenly move. Edward had been watching us.

I trudged up the stairs, entering in the house, ready to face the long day ahead. It was six am. I walked into the kitchen, thankful that I had remembered to set the coffee machine to brew while I said my goodbyes to Jasper.

As I began to sip the coffee, Emmett came bounding around the corner. I smiled over the mug. "Morning Emmett."

Emmett placed his arm around my shoulder. "Morning sunshine! Jasper left huh?"

I placed the cup down. I tried to keep the sadness out of my voice. "Yeah."

"So that means we have seventy two hours to carry on our torrid affair until he returns." He wiggled his eyebrows. I couldn't help but laugh.

I laughed harder when I heard Rose yell through the house- "Oh, you are very funny, Emmett Cullen! It's more like seventy two hours of celibacy!"

"Somebody got in trouble." I sang to him.

Emmett rolled his eyes. "Please. Like she can keep away from _this._" Motioning his hands towards his body.

I was positive Rose could. "Okay, Romeo. Do you think I could borrow your jeep to go to Jake's today?"

"Absolutely."

Several hours later I was knocking on Jacob's door. His own house was on the reservation only a little ways down from Billy's. When no one answered, I knocked louder.

"Jacob!"

I heard movement in the house but still no answer.

"Jacob!"

I heard a crash, then a muffled- "Shit!"

He opened up the door, wearing his trademark sweatpants with no shirt. "Bells, what do you want? Do you know what time it is?"

I smiled way too broadly, knowing it would piss Jacob off. I muscled my way past him. "Yes, it is nine am. You and I have a lot to do today."

He shut the door behind him. "What could I have to do? Really?"

"Well…" I said, pulling out the list Audrey gave me to make sure Jacob got it all completed. "Since I do not like all the really girly stuff, I was given the task of making sure you got your tuxedo, picked up the cake, picked up the rings, paid the caterer, and …" I trailed off.

"And?"

"Have a dance lesson."

He looked at me horridly. "No way! No freaking way! I am NOT going back to Renaldo!"

"Relax! I was just kidding about the last part. Really. No dance lesson. Promise."

I waited while Jacob showered and then we took off. The morning and early afternoon were busy, but we got all the chores done that Audrey needed. Since we did not need to be at the rehearsal dinner for the next two hours, Jacob suggested we walk the beach.

Of course, we ended up at our stump and sat down, just staring at the waves. Jacob was playing with the ring box. I took it from his hands. "May I?"

Jacob nodded. I opened the box. It held both rings. Jacobs was a simple platinum ring, although it was huge. Audrey's had tiny diamonds lining the ring. I pulled out Jacobs ring first. Being nosy, I peered at the inside of the ring. The engraving said- _"You are my sunshine."_ I then pulled out her ring. _"My only sunshine."_

I smiled. Jacob was always going to be my sun, and it was somehow comforting to know that Audrey felt the same way. "I love it, Jacob. The engraving is perfect. Are you ready for tomorrow?"

"As ready as I will ever be. I can't believe I will be a married man come tomorrow morning."

"I can. You and Aubrey were a long time coming. It's about time you settled down."

"Bella, I have always been settled."

"I know. You are like an old man in that sense. Do you have your vows ready?"

He nodded. "I do. Audrey wanted us to choose a poem that reflected how we felt about the other person. Would you like to hear mine? I could use the practice with a real person and not a mirror."

"I would be honored."

Jacob took my hand and looked me in the eyes as he tenderly spoke his vows.

"_i carry your heart with me,  
i carry it in my heart and i'm never without it.  
anywhere i go, you go, my dear.  
and whatever is done, by only me, is your doing, my darling.  
i fear no fear for you are my fate, my sweet.  
i want no world for beautiful, you are my world my true.  
it's you or whatever a moon has always meant,  
and whatever a sun will always sing is you.  
here is the deepest secret nobody knows  
here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud  
and the sky of the tree called life  
which grows higher and higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide  
and this is the wonder that is keeping the stars apart  
i carry your heart,  
i carry it in my heart"_

Tears threatened to fall from my eyes. "That was e., right?"

"I knew you would know it. Do you think she will like it?"

I threw my arms around my best friend. "Oh, Jake. That was so beautiful. Audrey is one really lucky girl you know that?"

He held me tighter. "And Jasper is one really lucky man. I mean that, Bells."

"I know." We pulled apart and I glanced at my watch. "Shit! It's five o'clock. We have to get you to the rehearsal dinner. Audrey is going to kill me!"

Jacob threw me on his back as we went running to his car. "Better you than me!"

The rehearsal dinner went smoothly. Emily had offered to make the dinner as she was used to feeding the pack. I had been grateful that they kept me so entertained I was did not have a whole lot of time to miss Jasper.

While the rehearsal dinner went smoothly, the morning of the wedding was utter chaos. Audrey's bouquet was missing from the rest of them and Jacob was missing his black shoes. These were both apocolcoptic events in the eyes of Audrey, and I was immediately sent to fix both issues, assuring a worried Audrey that everything would be fine, just fine.

During my mad dash at eight am for the bouquet, my phone buzzed with a text. "_Made it here safely. Have fun at the wedding. I will see you tomorrow. Love you. –Jasper"_

A small relief washed over me as I knocked on the door to the florist, kindly letting her know in my most urgent voice that the Bride's bouquet was not delivered. I wished I could be with Jasper, because I knew today would be difficult, but I knew he needed the time to himself and I needed to be here.

When the florist located the flowers, I ran back to Audrey's. I threw on my dress and applied just a little makeup before running out to fix the next issue.

I then drove to Jacobs house, were there was a flurry of activity from the pack, searching Jacobs car, his garage, and other random places where black dress shoes should never be. I navigated through the testosterone invested waters into his house.

"Jacob?"

Quil peered from out from the kitchen. I swear he was looking in the dishwasher. The dishwasher? "He is in his room, Bella."

"Thanks!"

I walked over to his room, where Jacob was staring out his window, messing with the cuffs on his sleeves. Jacob looked so incredibly different. He was in a full tux, his hair pulled neatly back into a pony tail. He had looked the age of twenty five years for a long time, but to me, it was the first time he ever looked grown up. If he even realized I entered the room, he did not move to indicate he had.

"Wow. You clean up nicely."

"Bella." He jumped slightly before turning to look at me. "I can say the same for you."

I blushed. "Thanks. Umm… I am here for operation missing shoes."

He sheepishly grinned. "I have no idea where they are and neither does anyone else."

"Where have you looked?"

"Everywhere."

"Well, we will just have to check everywhere again. I promised I would get you to the church on time. Nervous?" I asked as I opened the closet, peering in. Not there.

"Yeah. A little." Jake began shuffling through his drawers to help in the search.

I bent over, looking under the bed for the missing shoes. "You should be. It's not every day you get married."

I felt around in the darkness, smiling when I felt what appeared to be a shoe. I pulled it out, victory in my hands as it proved to be missing said shoe. I quickly retrieved the other. "Everywhere, huh?"

"I did look everywhere! Where were they?"

"Under the bed."

"Oh. Well, I guess I did not look there."

I rolled my eyes before kissing his cheek. "Put these on. I meant it when I said you did look handsome, but I think she would prefer a groom who had shoes."

I leaned out the bedroom door and yelled, "Boys! I found the shoes!!! Is everyone else ready?"

After receiving multiple confirmations, I dragged Jacob out of his room lining all the boys up to get to the church. I mentally vowed to myself that my wedding day would be simple with no craziness ensuing.

After the hectic morning, I was never so happy as to hear the wedding music begin to play. The church was packed, and as I walked down the aisle with Sam (Jacob's best man since he could not pick over Quil or Embry), I smiled at my dad who was sitting in the second row, right behind Billy. Sam stood next to Jacob, who still wore that nervous look. I looked at him in what I hoped would be a reassured manner. When the bridal march began to play, all eyes turned to the double doors that opened wide.

I noticed that the nerves seemed to go away as his eyes fell on his bride.

Aubrey was beautiful and looked simply like a princess. She was positively glowing all over and was brimming with excitement at the knowledge she was finally marrying Jacob. Their eyes never left each others throughout the entire ceremony.

Every word was heartfelt and true, and every woman's heart melted in the room when Jacob read his poem. When they finally said, "You may kiss the bride", the entire church erupted in cheers. Once those words were spoken, he seemed lighter than ever before.

The night was magical. They rented a tent that looked over the cliffs. I spent the night bouncing from table to table, talking with all these amazing people who had such a deep impact on my life throughout the past six years. They were all amazing and I would miss so many of them since I would not be allowed on the reservation anymore when I turned. So I spent the evening soaking up their laughter, listening to their words of wisdom, and just enjoying the friendships I had developed.

It was well past midnight when I finally headed home, Jacob and Aubrey leaving for their honeymoon hours before. I walked in the Cullen household, the family greeting me just as that, family. I was going to miss those friends, but I knew I was gaining so much more. When I finally went to bed, I dreamed of my own wedding to Jasper, declaring my own eternal love to him. I could not wait to see him.

Unfortunately, the next day Jasper never showed.

**A/N: By the by, the engravings on the weddings rings is what my husband and I have on ours. **


	38. Chapter 38

When Jasper had not shown that afternoon, I had been nervous. I told myself, _maybe he is just late. Maybe his flight was delayed. _I knew better though. In the entire time Jasper and I were together, Jasper would have called me or texted me that he was delayed or late, not that it ever happened.

Esme spent the better part of the evening trying to calm me down, when I had insisted around eight at night that I was getting on the next flight and searching for him. The rest of the family believed I was overreacting and was jumping to conclusions that there was something wrong. Maybe I was hysterical, but I did not think I was jumping to conclusion. Carlisle advised me that they will go and search for him if he does not come back by the morning.

After I finally reluctantly promised them that I would not go off on my own to look for him, Carlisle gave me something to sleep. Despite my best attempts to fight it, I found myself falling into to a deep, dreamless slumber.

The next morning, I awoke in our bed, by myself. When Jasper was not lying next to me, I knew that he still had not returned back home. My stomach dropped even further when Carlisle and Emmett came in the room after hearing a sob rip from my shaking body.

Emmett rushed over to the bed, sitting down; trying to caress me in what I am sure he thought was a soothing manner. It simply made me feel worse.

Carlisle looked directly at me. "Bella, as promised, we made flight arrangements to leave. The next available flight."

I nodded slightly. My throat felt like it was constricting, but I managed to squeak out, "When do we leave?"

He was gentle with his next words, knowing it would not make me happy. "The flight is only for three. Emmett, Edward, and I will be going."

"Edward! Edward? Why would he go? Why not me? Carlisle, I cannot just sit here."

Emmett handled that line of questioning. "Edward cares about Jasper, too. But more, he also cares about you and he hates seeing you in pain. Edward's talent can be very useful if we need to take advantage of it. I know you want to help, but the search will be quicker if you stay here."

I wanted to argue, be disagreeable, but I had to admit he was right. Edward was the more logical person and they would not be held up by a slow human. I wanted to do what was best for Jasper, not what my own selfish needs to be involved in the search. They left shortly thereafter, with a promise to call when they found something.

I paced around worriedly, positive I was wearing a hole into the Cullen's house, as I had been doing it for two days straight. Esme and Rosalie's attempts to calm me down were useless, and they gave up a day ago, only asking me to stop when I needed to eat.

Carlisle had called yesterday evening. As they suspected, Jasper was nowhere to be found at Alice's grave. They had picked up his scent there, so Jasper had definitely gone there. They traced his scent to the local airport, where it disappeared. They promised that they would come back here and discuss in further detail what they found out and what they were going to do as soon as they were done.

I had broken down at that news, crying that my fears were confirmed. Esme just held me the entire time, letting my tears overtake my body until I could not cry anymore. Exhausted, I finally fell asleep in her arms for several hours. Esme had never moved, continuing the same soothing motion she had when she first held me. I looked up at her gratefully and then stood up to resume my useless strides.

"Oh for God's sake, Bella. Stop it. Just stop it already!" Rosalie pulled me away from the door. "That is it, you are ending this now! I am not allowing this any further. This-" she mimicked my pacing, "is not going to solve anything. If you want to find Jasper than you are going to need to help. Plain and simple. Carlisle and them are going to be home any minute, and then we can figure out a plan. But first, trust me when I say that you need to take a shower and get something to eat. Do you think that you can do that?"

I stood there, dumbfounded at Rosalie. She was right of course. This was not going to help anything at all, but at least it was something to do. When Carlisle came back, I wanted to be of help, so I finally nodded in agreement. She looked at me in disbelief as she couldn't believe that her final plea had actually worked. She led me to the shower, where there was a towel and a new set of clothes already waiting for me. I turned on the shower, letting the heat flow over my body till I could not take it anymore. Red, but thoroughly cleaned, I dressed and moved to the kitchen, while Esme prepared me a sandwich to eat.

"It's good to see you up and about, Bella." Esme tried to give me a reassuring smile.

All I could do was nod as I numbly ate the sandwich she put out in front of me. I ate it all even though I was not hungry in the slightest. I was going to be of use somehow to all of them, but I needed to keep my strength up in order to do that.

When Esme announced that the men were back, I ran to door to greet them. Carlisle was the first to walk in. He gave me a small smile, trying to be encouraging. Emmett and Edward walked in behind him, both of their faces serious. They were all quiet for a moment, it was driving me insane.

Finally Rosalie spoke up. "So are you going to tell us what the hell is going on or are you going to stand there all day keeping Bella and us in suspense?"

Carlisle put his hand on Rosalie's shoulder reassuringly. "Let's sit down in the Living Room where we can talk."

I followed Carlisle and Rosalie. I sat on the couch opposite from them, and it was not lost on me when Edward sat down right next to me. Emmett sat on my other side, while Esme sat in the leather chair. It was the closest that Edward had been to me since the encounter several months ago, but I honestly did not have time to process that. I wanted to find out about Jasper. I looked at Carlisle expectantly.

"So what did you find out, Carlisle?" Esme's voice was a voice of calm.

"Well, as I mentioned on the phone, when we got there, Jasper was no longer in the vicinity near Alice's burial site. We tracked his scent all the way to the airport where it simply disappeared."

This was what I was partially worrying about while pacing. What if he just decided that he did not want to be with me anymore and left? I could not see a logical reason that this could be. We were happy, truly happy. Could it be the letter that I had given him regarding Alice? Could reading that have changed his mind?

As if Edward was reading mine, he spoke quietly. "Bella, Jasper did not just up and leave. We could tell at the gravesite that there was a fight. A fight with multiple other vampires."

My head whipped around in his direction. "Fight? Other vampires?"

Edward's eyes were filled with remorse. Whether it was from the loss of his brother, or from his sorrow between what had passed between us at Christmas, or a combination of both I could not be sure. He nodded. "The gravesite itself was not touched, but right outside of it, there was a large scuffle, we can tell from the footprints. The stench of vampire was everywhere and it was strong."

I sat there quietly, absorbing what Edward just told me. Rosalie was the next to speak up. "Did you recognize any of the scents?"

Edward shook his head. "No, not a single one of them."

Carlisle then turned his attention to me. "Bella, do you know if Jasper had made any enemies recently?"

"No. Jasper was pretty solitary with the exception of when it came to me. He enjoyed being alone. He never introduced me to or talked about any other vampire with me."

It was the answer that Carlisle was expecting. "At the airport, his scent vanished, which was expected."

"So what do we do? Carlisle, we cannot just leave him!" I knew my voice was desperate and panicked.

Emmett touched my shoulder then. I turned around towards my big brother. "Bella, as Jasper knows," he smiled as if remembering a fond memory, "I have become a good tracker over these past few years myself. We have a plan. We are going to hack into the airport's database and find out all the flights that have taken off in the past seventy-two hours. From there, I am going to begin tracking for Jasper's scent. It may take a while, but we will find him. If whoever took him wanted him dead, they could have easily killed him at Alice's grave. There were enough of them to overtake him. So I believe completely that we will find him alive."

"I'll go with you." My voice sounded stronger than it felt.

Emmett took my hand and said quietly. "You can't. You will just delay me. Trust me, I promise I will keep you updated the entire time and let you know what is happening, okay? Once I locate him, we will all go to retrieve him, including you. I leave tomorrow once we get a list of the flights."

Tears brimmed in my eyes. I gave Emmett a large hug. "Thank you."

Carlisle stood up. "We have some work we have to do in order to access those flight paths." He nodded in Emmett's direction. "Emmett, if you can please come with me and we can determine the best course of action."

"Sure, Carlisle." Emmett and Esme both got up, following Carlisle into his office.

That left only me, Rosalie, and Edward in the room. As I got up to stand, Edward touched my arm. "Please wait."

I looked at Rose. I was not ready to be in a room alone with him. She understood. "Bella, I will be on the other side of the room if you need me."

I just did a slight nod to show I understood. I sat back down and looked at Edward. "Edward. Thank you for going with Carlisle and Emmett up north."

"There is nothing to thank me for. Of course I would look for Jasper, Bella. He is my brother, I care for him."

I sat there for a moment, cocking my head. With the anxiety that had been building over the past several days, I needed a release and was ready for a confrontation. "Do you now? I mean, our encounter in December did not exactly leave brotherly feelings on either end."

Edward looked at me surprised. "In December I was in shock. I was upset."

I looked at him pointedly. "Exactly. Why would you want to help?"

"Bella, I had just lost my one true love. I lost you. Of course I was upset. I was trying to protect you from our kind and you somehow managed to find a way back into our lives. Then I find out that you are in love with my brother. That killed me inside. It is not something that one can move past in less than a day."

I made a motion to speak, but he put his finger up asking me to hold. "Bella, what I did, or tried to do when we were alone that afternoon, is unforgivable. I will keep apologizing for it until I no longer exist. I was jealous and had foolishly convinced myself that you really wanted me, not him. I let my demon get the best of me and it took over. I was never more grateful to Jasper than I was on that day. The thought of if I had harmed you in any way… I had sworn to always protect you, and I broke that promise. I swear, I will try to make it right. I know you love Jasper now. I promise you, I will not get in the way of the two of you ever again."

He looked so sincere and for a moment I let myself believe that my old Edward was really back, and that there was a possibility that we could be friends. Then I remembered the calls and my anger boiled over.

With the harshest voice I could muster, I said- "Edward, as sweet and sincere as you make this all sound, I know it is a bold face lie."

Edward looked as if I had ripped out his heart. I could even see from the corner of my eye Rosalie looked surprised at my reaction. His voice had taken on a devastated tone. "Why would you say that, Bella?"

"Please Edward. You and I both know that you are jealous over what Jasper and I have. You have not even tried to let go since December. I have caught you numerous times staring at me when you think I am not looking _and_ you have been calling me since Christmas. I have been getting random calls about three times a month since then where the person just breathes into the phone. Those two actions clearly demonstrated that you are not over me."

Edwards's eyes darkened. "Bella, I will not deny the fact that I look at you when you think I am not looking. You would not even let me talk to you. Looking at you is the only connection I have to you anymore. I was never trying to make you uncomfortable. But Bella, the phone calls? That was not me. I never called you. Not once."

I crossed my arms. "Not once?"

"Never." The look that was in his eyes made me believe that he might actually be telling the truth. "Bella, where is your cell phone?"

"In my pocket in case Jasper calls."

"Hand it to me."

I reached in my pocket, fumbling for the phone. If it was not Edward calling, than who was it? I handed him my cell phone. He flipped it open easily.

"Bella, when was the last call from this person?"

"Two weeks ago right before we left for Forks."

Edward scanned the history. His eyes narrowed as he looked through the history. "Rose, get Carlisle. Now."

Rose nodded and flew up the stairs towards the office. "Who do you think it is, Edward?"

He shook his head. "I don't know. I don't recognize the number. But it's too much of a coincidence that this person has been calling you randomly and then Jasper disappears, don't you think?"

Carlisle came down the stairs in a blur. Edward explained to him the mysterious calls that I had been receiving and handed him the phone. Carlisle examined the number.

"Do you recognize the number, Carlisle?" I asked hopefully.

"No, but I think it will help us narrow down where to start looking. Bella, I am going to borrow your phone for a minute."

For the first time in two days, I felt hope. In the next few hours, Carlisle got a copy of my call history. Twelve calls from the same number in the past three and a half months. While we could not tell where the calls when they were made originated from, we did know that the area code was Texas.

It led us all to one conclusion. Maria.

**A/N: Well, you now have your answer! Sorry for the folks who was hoping it was Alice! I loved all the reviews from the past few chapters! Next chapter is a Jasper POV which will explain some things!!! Just an FYi… this next week is incredibly busy for me, so the next update will probably not come for the next couple of weeks.**


	39. Chapter 39

**A/N: I am glad you all liked the last chapter and thank you for all the kind reviews. This is Jasper's POV about what happened. Enjoy!!**

**Jasper's POV**

"No, I promise! Please let me go! I will not say anything to the cops if you let me go, please!"

I turned my eyes for a moment as a girl around the age of eighteen was brought into the room and flung to the floor. A loud crack was heard as her head hit the course stone and she sat there, whimpering in the corner, tears flowing freely from her. Fear radiated from her form as she wildly glanced up at me.

The smell of the girl's blood was potent as it began to flow from her head wound. It disgusted me, and yet at the same time, it was divine. I forced myself to stop breathing, and turned my face away from her. I was better off pretending that she was not there.

I had done this with everyone other "meal", Maria had presented me with over the past week and a half. She cocked her head at me slightly, staring at me, watching my every miniscule movement. Waiting for some sign that my resolve was weakening and that I would give into temptation. This had been the sixth meal she had brought me, and I would be lying to myself if I did not admit it was getting tougher each time.

Instead, I reverted to what I did every time she brought me a human. I thought about Bella, and I thought back to that afternoon at the cemetery, again playing though what I should have done differently, not that it would have helped.

_The small figure stepped out from under the oak tree. He red eyes seemed to glow, even in the light of day. I did not move as she stepped closer to me._

"_Maria."_

"_Mi Amor. You remembered me. I am so touched."_

"_What are you doing here?"_

"_Why, I came here for you, my love."_

"_I doubt that." I looked at her wearily. Maria never cared about me really. No, she only cared what I could do for her, what advantage I would bring her. _

_She mockingly gasped. "Mi Amor, how could you think that? I have missed you dearly. Eighty years is a long time. Surely you missed me."_

_I took one more look at Alice's grave, pissed that that my sire had interrupted this moment and began to walk away. I could care less why she was here and did not want to give her the time of day. "Goodbye, Maria."_

_Maria's frown was apparent and ran over to land in front of me, her mirth gone. "But we are just getting re-acquainted. You are not going anywhere."_

_I suddenly saw fifteen other vampires appear out of the edges of the woods on the other side of the cemetery. Whatever Maria had been there for, she meant business._

"_I hope you don't mind. I brought some friends with us. I wanted a proper welcoming party to greet you back."_

_I could tell that ten of them were newborns; the other five were older vampires, but no one I recognized from my days with Maria. Those commrades were probably all dead, out of her favor long ago. "What do you want?"_

_She laughed again. "What do I want? What do I want? Jasper, I want you, of course. Did you really think that I would come up north for anything less?"_

_I rolled my eyes at her. She was so dramatic. "What do you want of me?"_

_She smiled, pleased that I asked that question. "I want you to take over my army again. Since you left, I have consistently lost territory. My reign in Mexico and Texas has diminished. I need your leadership, your cunning, but most of all, I need your ruthlessness."_

"_Sorry, Maria. I don't live your lifestyle anymore. I am not that Jasper."_

_She looked in my eyes, pity taking her over. "Yes, I can see that. I can smell her all over you. A human, Jasper? That is just sick."_

_My eyes furrowed. "Leave her alone."_

_She looked at me innocently. "I would not touch her… if you come with me willingly. Of course, if you don't, I cannot make any promises for her safety .I figured that this vegetarian lifestyle was just a phase. I thought that surely after she-" she motioned to Alice's grave, "died, you would come crawling back to me. I gave you time to mourn your mate, you had already separated yourself really from the rest of that group, it was just a matter of time before you asked to come back. Then that human came into the picture and ruined all my plans."_

_My anger was overwhelming as pieces of the puzzle began to click in place. "What did you have to do with Alice's death?"_

_She smiled. "Ah, your eyes are darkening, Mi Amor. That is more like it. See, it does not take a lot for that ruthlessness to come back."_

_I shoved her harshly. "Do not toy with me, Maria. I asked you a question."_

_Her delight at my anger only served to upset me more. "She was only too easy to kill. I sent a bunch of newborns up this way. I gave them orders to wait. They did not know what my intent was, they only thought they were sent up her for some training so your mate could not see it happening. So they waited patiently, as did I, till you were hunting and she was not. I casually suggested that they should get some practice by attacking your town. I knew that your perfect little pixie was too sweet to let that slaughtering just occur. I had also suggested that if they should run into any other vampires to eliminate them. It was only too easy."_

_Rage overtook me. "You killed my Alice. You killed my mate. I will destroy you if it is the last thing I do."_

_She laughed. The bitch actually had the nerve to laugh. "Oh come now. There are fifteen other vampires here and they are my strongest, smartest, and most loyal. I would not bring anything but the best. I did this all for you. I will admit, I thought about killing your new mate, but since my plot did not work the first time, I figured that I would just take you by surprise and sheer force. Trust me, you will thank me later. Mi Amor, you are still famous in the south. The great major. You are still feared. I am going to help you regain that glory, and you will thank me."_

_I did not trust Maria promise of not harming Bella. I needed to get out of there. As much as I wanted to rip her to pieces, I cared about Bella more. Besides, with time to spare, I could plot out her death, making it painful and torturous. _

_I noticed there was a small gap in between two of the newborns. I could not overtake them, but I could possibly evade them. I took off for the gap. I got past the two of them, but a third quickly latched on to me, biting me in the arm. I grabbed its face, ripping its head from its body before continuing my run. Several overtook me then, and I fought my way through them, having time only to maim, but not kill. _

_Maria appeared before me, her hair wild and her temper flaring. I lunged at her and just as my teeth were about to sink deep into her, I stopped. There was a force preventing my action that I could not explain, but I was stuck were I was. She stepped away from me casually, smirking. She turned to address the others._

"_He is not to be killed. If anyone harms him any more than is necessary, I will personally see to your own deaths. Is that clear?"_

_I found I could still talk, even though I could not move. "What did you do to me?"_

"_It's not what I did. I found another unique talent while were away from me." An older vampire, around the age of forty-five appeared through the trees. "Mi Amor, meet Randall. Randall can make any vampire go slower, or even stop dead in his tracks. He had orders to stop you if you tried to attack me."_

_I looked at the vampire who had a knowing smirk on his face. He was well taken care of. Maria took care of her vampires that were her favorites. "If that is the case, then why do you need me? He could stop your opponents."_

_Maria looked at Randall and then back at myself. "He can only stop one vampire at a time and certainly does not have your flair and passion for military training. Still, he has his definite uses. Neil, Simon, John, and Jeffery, please see our guest is taken care of. Jasper, I will see you in Texas."_

_She walked in front of me, never looking back as I was led though the forest till we reached the edge of the road to several unmarked vans. I was thrown in one, where the four male vampires looked at me smugly. Randall, was sitting in the passenger side of the vehicle. He looked over at me. _

"_I really don't want to restrain you the entire trip you know. Maria practically reveres you and I have never seen her so happy. Just relax and it will make the trip a lot easier."_

"_I am going to kill her."_

_He laughed. "Get in line. It's not going to happen on my watch."_

_Jasper did not know what Maria could have possibly done to inspire this vampire's devotion. But then again, what had she done to inspire his all those years ago? He decided to play it civil for now while he figured out a plan. "Where are we going?"_

_Randall paused. "Well, we are going multiple places throughout Texas. It will take a few days. I hope you don't mind planes."_

I was pulled out of my thoughts as the blond haired girl pleaded again to no one in general. "Please! Please let me go!"

I calmed her down, until her heartbeat steadied to normal rate. I knew that I may not be able to prevent her death, but I could at least make her last moments not be ones filled with utter terror. She just looked at me, then to the others waiting for my move. She was not the only one. Randall looked at me in disbelief yet again, amazed that I could resist so strong a temptation.

I discovered that Randall did not need to be in the room with me to use his ability, just somewhere in the general vicinity. He used his ability whenever Maria was in the same room as me, but generally left me alone otherwise, unless there was a need for it, like the several times I had tried to escape.

Maria cracked her knuckles. It was a trait of hers she had since I had known her. "How do you expect to get strong if you won't eat? You eyes are becoming pitch black."

"I will not take another life."

The dark haired vampire just laughed. "You say that with such conviction. Always. You have turned so noble, Mi Amor. We have to change that. You will be of no use to me if we don't." Sensing my resolve, she sighed. "Well, if you are going to be stubborn yet again…" She yelled to the closed door. "Gina and Shawn, please remove our guest. You can share her if you like."

The two lackeys came into the room and snatched up the girl, who began screaming as they dragged her out of the room. Soon, I heard her screams end and I knew her agony was over forever. Mine however, would continue as long as I was stuck here, wherever I was.

Maria walked over to me, her hands lightly outlining my scars that were visible from my clothes. Her pleasure was abundant as her fingers traced a particular scar on my neck, her voice taking on a tone as if remembering something quite pleasant. "Your first scar. You had tasted so sweet, I admit that it had been hard to stop drinking from you. But I knew what you were going to be for me, how you were going to help me raise my army."

Her voice lowered to whisper as she leaned into my ear. "Just give in, Jasper. One taste of human blood is all you need. I know you are still fighting it, but soon, soon you will not be able to resist any longer. You won't be able to resist the blood and you won't be able to resist me. We can be as great as we once were."

Her tongue then ran along the scar, as a reminder to me that she was my creator, my damner. I shivered in revulsion and thought of how I was going to escape this hellhole and find my way back to Bella. I knew that she must be sick with worry and I was sure the family was looking for me right now. If I could somehow get past Randall, I thought I had a decent chance of escaping.

"Maria, you forget. I drank blood and I still willingly left this existence. I don't want to take any more lives, but more so, I don't want to be any part of you or your so called army."

"Oh, Mi Amor…" she purred as her hand rested softly on my cheek, her eyes devoid of any warmth. "It is going to be such a wonderful day when you finally break."

**A/N: So what do you think of Maria?**


	40. Chapter 40

A/N: Well, this chapter was harder to write than I thought… I was literally done with this chapter, writing the authors note ready to post, when my computer died and it had only saved an old version of this chapter from several days ago! Grrr… so please forgive me that this chapter is probably not as good as it was previously but I had to rewrite it all, especially the Jasper POV and I am exhausted but I really wanted to get another chapter out to everyone since you have all be so awesome.

I am recommending two stories that I have recently come upon… the first is a Jacob story. Even if you do not like Jacob, I recommend reading it. The plot is different. It's called Dreaming of Butterflies. The other story is only one chapter in, but I think it has a lot of great potential and I cannot wait to read more. It's from Missmaj- A Change in Course… so check them both out!!

Bella POV

It had been three weeks, two days, and fourteen hours and I was going mad. Everyone kept assuring me that Emmett's tracking skills were great, but apparently Maria's were better. Emmett would find a new trail every few days leading him to false trails and yet another dead end. Emmett was frustrated, I was frustrated, and the rest of the family was frustrated.

When Emmett called two days ago and confirmed that he was led to another false trail, I could not help but begin to wallow and start to think the worst. Finally after two days of internal torture, I couldn't take my thoughts anymore. They were eating me up from the inside out. Without saying a word to anyone, I turned, walked up to our room, closed the door, marched over to the reading chair in the corner, and curled up into a ball, letting silent tears fall over my cheeks. Within a minute, I heard a soft knock.

"Who is it?" I asked, wiping my tears. I did not have the strength to be strong anymore.

"It's Edward. Can I come in?"

I sighed. "Yes."

Over the past three weeks, Edward and I had come to an understanding. He was still in love with me, but he kept his promise and did not try to influence me to feel any other way than I did. I in return gave him a second chance to be my friend. It was slow going, but eventually over time, I thought we would get there.

Edward opened the door a notch before poking his head in. "Are you alright?"

I took a deep breath. Truth was, I was most definitely not alright. I shook my head no. Edward opened the door the rest of the way and sat on the arm of the chair. He slowly put his arm around my shoulder, pausing to make sure he was not going too far. When I did not yell at him, he gave me shoulder a gentle squeeze. I leaned into his hug hesitantly, my tears no longer silent.

"It will be okay, Bella."

"How can you say that? Three weeks! Over three weeks since he has been gone. What if he's dead?"

"He is not dead."

"How do you know?"

"I just know. Emmett would not have found so many trails. They are leading him on a wild goose chase, but they would need Jasper alive in order to do that."

I did not want to acknowledge it, but Edward's explanation made sense. Edward offered me a tissue from the table next to the chair. I took it, blowing my nose. I felt guilty for beginning to lose faith that we would never find him. I hated the fact that I even started to consider the possibility. "What if he has given up? What if he had decided he wanted to be with Maria?"

"Jasper would never give up. If he loves you even a quarter of the amount I do, he will never give up and leave you. And he does you know. I've seen his thoughts. His thoughts of you…"

Edward trailed off. I looked up at him, and he quietly continued. "Well, let's just say he is as devoted to you as I am."

"I need him Edward. I miss him."

Edward did something I never thought he would do again. He kissed the top of my head like he used to years ago. "I know you do. If it helps, we all miss him too."

I could tell Edward meant that last statement. "I know."

I heard the soft vibration of Edward's phone. He looked at the name. "It's Emmett."

I looked at him, trying not to get my hopes up only to have them squashed again. He flicked it open. "Hello Emmett."

I tried to lean in to hear, but Edward put up on finger, telling me to wait. "Yes…. She is here with me… Okay… Yes…. Yes… Yes… Okay. I will tell Carlisle…. Yes…. Yes…. Talk to you later."

My eyes were ready to bug out as I waited for Edward to shut off the phone. He looked down and then looked up with a smile I had not seen on him since my eighteenth birthday. "Emmett found him, Bella. He's positive his is in there. The scent is very fresh."

Fresh tears sprang to my eyes, but this time, they were tears of joy. "Really?"

"Really."

I gave him a small hug before running out the room, yelling for Carlisle and the rest of the family. We were going to get my Jasper back.

**Jasper POV**

I wanted to see my Bella.

Yesterday, I was brought to yet another one of Maria's hideouts. This one was different. Where the other facilities I had been a "guest" in were all run down abandoned buildings that were just waiting to be demolished, this new facility was a large compound, located on a sprawling Texas landscape. My instincts instantly told me that this was where Maria kept the newborns in between her territory skirmishes. This was headquarters.

The constant moving previously did not leave me much room to plan my escape. In the move to this new facility however, I had already determined multiple weak links in Maria's security detail around me and found the easiest course of escape. There was however, one ace that Maria had in her pocket that I had yet to figure out how to best deal with- Randall.

I had already devised a way to escape since I was at this new facility. I could already sense that the newborns Maria held were restless, angry, and looking for a fight. With little pressing, I would be able to incite a riot using their jealously and anger against one another. My hope was such that if there was enough chaos surrounding me, Randall would be busy with other matters and would not have time to focus on me and I could make a quick escape.

I would need to have luck on my side with that plan in order for everything to go correctly. Luckily, I had been devising a second plan that I had been working on for the past three weeks, but I knew it would take more time. Time I was not sure I had.

I had been talking with Randall these past several weeks, getting to know him and his weaknesses and in turn him learning more about me. In truth, he was quite impressive. Randall had been turned in the early nineties by Maria. From how he tells it, he was a very well off businessman in his human existence, with no heirs, no benefactors. Maria came across him one night in a bar. He had been enchanted by her from the start. He talked of how beautiful she was. He thought that she oozed charisma and strength, and Randall had liked those traits in his women. He brought her to his house for what he believed to be his latest conquest. Little did he know that she was going to conquest him, like she had so many others. He was shocked to learn what she really was. She killed him that night, staying at the house to oversee his transformation herself.

Maria had always had a knack for finding humans that could possibly have an ability that she could use to her advantage. Randall and I just happened to be her prize possessions. Randall did appear to express a keen interest in why I was so willing to resist the temptation of human blood and why I had chosen such a radical lifestyle.

I tried to express to him how my ability made me feel every ounce of fear and terror that a human was feeling before they were killed. How overwhelming it all was, and what a monster I realized I was. I explained how the vegetarian lifestyle made me more appreciative of this existence and how I could co-exist with the human culture, living as one of them, having a normal life.

I could tell that thought interested him. I also told him of my time with Maria, the controlling and manipulative nature she had always possessed and how time and time again she took credit for the work that I did with the Newborns. It was a brutal life, which Randall was becoming accustomed to, being with her well over fifteen years. With more time, I was convinced I could turn him against her. Make him realize that there really was a better life out there. It was working, albeit slowly. I could feel the reluctance he now began to feel with Maria when she ordered him to still me. He still listened to her, but it void of the blind devotion that was there three weeks ago.

A lot of the time, when I was not plotting my escape, I was planning Maria's painful death. The fury I felt over Alice's death would not be relieved until Maria's body was burning in a pit of fire, as she was finally brought down to her eternal damnation. I imagined endless ways to kill Maria, torturing her, making her suffer. Each idea far more brutal than then the last. I may not get my revenge right away if I had to escape, but I promised myself that I would get my revenge.

I walked the room she held me as a "guest" in. This room was larger than the others had been, and held more comforts of home. Maria had furnished a comfortable chair, next to a bookshelf, along with a working sink and mirror. The bookshelf held volume upon volume of books regarding different war strategies.

There was also a closet held new clothes in a closet that were tailored to my size. I thought for a moment about switching into them as my clothes were long since tattered and torn, but then decided that I would not give the evil bitch any amount of satisfaction, no matter how small.

I had only glanced in the mirror once since arriving in this room, disgusted with what I saw. The being in front of me screamed vampire, my eyes black as night, the traces of humanity I had left hanging by a very thin thread. I had promptly smashed the mirror into a thousand little pieces, disgusted.

I was worn down, the insatiable hunger I felt consistently finally getting to me. The reek of human blood was all over this compound in particular, and it was difficult to think. I felt myself slip now and again, imagining sweet human blood filling my mouth and quenching my parched throat.

I needed to escape. I needed to escape now. I just hoped I would before it was too late.


	41. Chapter 41

A/N: Well, guys, this a very long chapter… the longest ever in my story by far. I hope you enjoy. There is a lot of information in here!

**Bella's POV**

"For the last time, I said its fine, Edward. I'm going."

Edward looked at Carlisle for support. "She is mad, Carlisle! Mad! You seriously cannot even be considering letting her go down to Texas. It's suicide!"

Carlisle gave one stern look at Edward before he sat down in his seat, yielding to his father. "We are all going. We promised we would go as a family and that is exactly what we are doing. She is his fiancé. She has the right to go."

Edward looked around for aid from anyone. Esme was firmly by Carlisle's side, her hand placed on her hips, her look clearly in support of whatever decision Carlisle made. Edward then stared at Rose, who gave him her typical cool look in return. Edward, in desperation, then finally looked at the phone that was placed in the center of the coffee table, where Emmett was on speaker. Edward pleaded his case to him.

"Emmett, surely you agree with me! This is your little sister! There is no need for Bella to travel with us; we can save Jasper on our own."

Through the phone Emmett responded, "Bro, she wants to go. Nothing is going to stop her; you of all people should know that. If it was my Rosie there, and I was human, I would be there in a heartbeat too."

Edward threw his hands up in the air. "I can't believe this! Am I the only one who is at all concerned about Bella's safety? She is not a vampire! Knowing Bella's luck, she will get caught somehow by Maria and then what? We will have two rescues instead of one if she is not already dead!"

I glanced at Edward coolly. "That is just what I am counting on, Edward."

Edward gawked at me as if I had three heads. "What??" He looked wildly around again, looking for anyone to acknowledge that I had truly gone insane. While Edward was out for a quick hunt after Emmett's call a couple of hours ago, I had suggested that we meet. At first Carlisle had been reluctant, but once I explained my reasoning that Edward did not have the capability to look beyond my immediate safety, he agreed that we should meet without his involvement. I had been thinking of a plan over the past week, which I thought was a relatively decent one. When I filled in the Cullen's on my idea, they understood why I had left Edward in the dark, his reaction to plan obvious. "What is going on?"

Esme sat down next to Edward. "We are letting Bella get caught."

I explained to Edward the plan. Maria would be anticipating a direct attack from the Cullen's and no doubt already had defenses set up. Our only hope of rescuing Jasper would be if we could supply a distraction. A distraction that I would hopefully provide. Over the past few months, Jasper described in detail his time with Maria. From what he told me, Maria was very manipulative but her pride was easily her greatest weakness.

He had told me how Maria always viewed him as an object to get what she needed and she was insanely jealous when he had left her and disappeared without a trace. She had lost her greatest asset and she did not want to share him. Jasper had known the wrath that the other vampires in her coven had endured, all over the fact that her precious prize had gotten away from her.

I had planned to use this information to our advantage. Surely by now she was aware of my existence, and surely she loathed me for it. I hoped that by letting myself get captured, she would be too busy with me to notice an attack fronted by the Cullen's.

Edward listened to my idea in relative silence. When I finished, I sat back down on the couch and waited for the explosion that never came. Instead, Edward appeared almost calm.

"I won't let any of you do this." He knelt in front of me and took my hands in his, his eyes pleading with mine. "Bella, I can get over the fact that you no longer love me the way I love you. I can even get over the fact that you love Jasper, my brother. But please do not do this to me. I love you too much to let you be a martyr. If Jasper were here, he would agree with me. We have all heard the stories of Maria. She is a savage, her brutality known all throughout the south. You will not live through this. Do not make me watch you die."

I turned to Edward. "It's a chance I am willing to take. I'm not afraid. I risked my life to save my mother from James all those years ago, and I am willing to risk it for Jasper. Edward, I'm not an idiot. I know the risks, but again, you always underestimate me. I am not going in entirely unprepared. Emmett is obtaining a small tracking device you can use to track me. If she imprisons me, you will know where I am at all times. If she switches me to a different location, you will know where I am."

Edward squeezed my hand harder. "But what if she decides to kill you? Bella, I can't be positive I will be able to save you."

"It's a possibility. But Emmett is also obtaining a silent alarm I can set off to warn you if I appear in imminent danger. I didn't say this plan is foolproof. But it is the best we have and we are following through with it. I love him too much not to. You don't have to go and be part of this plan if you do not want to. But without you there, there is just that much more of a chance someone might not make it out alive. And I want our whole family to survive this. Including you. You are family, Edward."

I stood up next to him and gave him a hug before whispering. "Thank you for caring so much about me. But this isn't up for debate anymore. We leave tonight."

Edward nodded. "Okay. I'll go."

***

That night I was alone in my hotel room. Emmett, as promised, had quickly procured the silent alarm and tracking unit. We had arranged for me to be in a separate hotel on the other edge of town so the other vampires would not smell the Cullen's on me and think it was a trap.

Emmett had given me a heads up as to the local places that the vampires tended to frequent for their hunt. There was a bar named Chaos that Emmett had noticed had the same strong female scent that had been consistent during his tracking of Jasper. He was confident it was Maria's.

I got ready that night, in a pair of tight jeans and a black low cut shirt, an outfit that I hoped would bring attention to myself. My plan was simple, hang out at the bar for a few nights, drop a few subtle hints that I was in search for my fiancé and thought he was down here, and hope for the best that one of Maria's lackey's would tell her and she would take the bait. If that did not work, then the Carlisle and they would attack directly.

I walked into Chaos. It was a dive bar, with Country music blaring in the background. I stepped up to the bar, placing a drink order. It did not take long for the locals to start asking me questions. A man who was missing two teeth started the evening.

"Why so sad, sugar?"

I took my beer and gave a long swig. "My name isn't sugar. It's Bella. And what makes you think I am sad?"

"Well, Bella, you look like you lost your puppy is all."

"Try my fiancé."

"Ouch. Did he cheat on ya?"

I shook my head. "I wish. He just disappeared. I am actually here looking for him. He used to be from this area and I was thinking maybe he got cold feet and came back this way."

"Well, this is a small town. What is his name?"

"Jasper. I came here against the will of his family, looking for him. Hoping somehow he will show up."

As the evening progressed, I noticed that there were two vampires in the corner who had been stealing glances my way all evening. They kept to themselves, never once approaching me, but it was obvious they were interested all the same.

That night, when I left the bar at 2am, I noticed that they followed me out as I climbed into the cab I had called. I noticed in the rearview mirror as we pulled away that one pulled out his phone and made a call.

The next night, I returned to the same bar. Same vampires were sitting the same corner as the evening before. I bellied up to the bar to order a beer again. The evening went in much the same manner as the night before, with me telling random men my tale of woe.

Finally, a voice that made the hair on the back of my head stand on edge cut through the night air. The accent was a thick Spanish accent and utterly feminine. "Excuse me, but I understand you lost a man named Jasper?"

I turned around, to a see a beautiful vampire standing in front of me. Her hair was the color of midnight and she was stunning. She also looked like one of the most evil beings I had ever met. I let myself look at her surprised, pretending not to know her. "Yes. I am. You're a vampire. Do you know where he is?"

She smiled. "Ah yes. I do. You must love him a lot to come searching for a vampire."

I nodded. "I love him more than anything. I have been sick with worry, while his family has stayed home convinced he will come back. Only his brother, Emmett, has even bothered looking and he has come up with nothing. I took off on my own two days ago to find him. Where is he? Is he alright?"

"He is fine. He is an old friend and came down here on his own accord. Things are more difficult than they seem. I don't think he is ready to commit to a human."

"But he said he loved me!" I wailed, producing large crocodile tears.

She rubbed my arm in what I am sure she thought was a compassionate manner. "Oh, Mi Amore, you are not the first human to fall for his charms….I can take you to him if you like."

"Ummm…. I don't know. Can't you have him meet me here?"

"He would not come if he knew you were here. It is best if you go to him."

I pretended to think a moment. "I am not sure. You… you won't hurt me?"

The evil bitch smiled. "Oh no, mi amore, I won't hurt you. Just follow me and I will bring you to your love."

I nodded silently in what I hoped appeared to be an uncertain manner as I began to follow her out of the bar.

I casually hit the pocket of my jeans, setting off the tracking unit, letting the Cullen's know I made contact with Maria.

***

Several Hours Later…

**Jasper POV**

Maria walked in the door, closing it gently behind her. I would not look at her. She came over with the pout on her face that she had worn so many times before in the past and lifted my chin with her finger.

"Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Jasper. My Jasper. We cannot have you like this. You are weak. Are you sure you will not have just a little something to eat? After all, it's been four weeks and you must be starving by now."

I looked at her coldly. Truth was, I was ready to give in. For years, I had learned to control my bloodlust by regular feedings. However, I had never gone more than 4 or 5 days without eating and that was pushing my limits. My blood thirst had become too great now to ignore. I could not push back my demon even if I wanted to. A part of me hung in shame, knowing that I was failing those I loved. The other part cried out for blood, cried out for satisfaction.

Maria looked into my charcoal black eyes. She saw the resignation and smiled victoriously. "I am glad you have come to your senses, Mi Amor. You have forgotten what you have missed all these decades. I am going to open you back up to the world you were always meant to be in. "

I heard shuffling coming from down the hall and muted noises. I knew what was coming, and my mouth filled with venom in anticipation for what was to await me. As the last threads of my humanity broke, I told myself there would be time for regrets later and hopefully redemption.

Maria cocked her head at me curiously before smiling as she stood by the door. "Mi Amor, I have only the finest for you this evening. It is a rather great vintage year if I do say so myself. Please, take this as a gift from me to you to show you how much I love you."

I heard the muffled sounds becoming louder and Maria opened the door with great flourish, and the smell of human blood assaulted my senses, my vampire roaring to life, eager to satisfy. But underneath that, something more happened.

I shot up my head quickly, the smell that assaulted me so achingly familiar. There is front of me stood _my _Bella, bound and her eyes wide open, pleading with me. She was beautiful and all mine. I was going to suck her dry.

Maria caressed Bella's face, pleased by my hungry reaction. "As I said, Mi Amor, only the finest for you. I thought I would need to go through much trouble to find her, and instead, she fell right into my lap, looking for you. The lamb came to the slaughterhouse almost willingly. I would not let anyone else, including myself spoil her for you. I promise she has not been touched, that is for you only."

She turned to Bella, whispering to her almost seductively. "See? I promised you I would not hurt you. But I never said anything about your beloved. Four weeks of no hunting will break even the strongest vampire."

I licked my lips eagerly, only flickering my eyes to Maria's briefly before returning to Bella. "Thank you."

Maria nodded with just a hint of a smile as she undid Bella restraints that were holding her hands. She looked over at me. "Jasper, when I leave the room, Randall will release you. In the meantime…" she grabbed Bella's gag. "Don't play with your food."

She removed the gag from her and promptly left the room.

Bella immediately ran over to me. "Jasper! Jasper! It's me, it's Bella. Your Bella. Yours!"

I closed my eyes tight for a brief moment. Her blood was racing throughout her entire body at an alarming rate. It coursed through her veins, begging to be devoured. It was sweetest and the most intoxicating smell I have ever smelt in my life. I wanted hers like no other and I would get to have her.

She was prey. She was mine. I would have her blood, all of her as part of me forever and be satisfied. I smirked as I saw she began to step away. I tried to move, frustrated that Randall had not yet let me go. My eyes followed hers around the room. I knew my eyes reflected pure evil. I was glad. Let her see the real Jasper Whitlock. Let her see the man who led armies, who killed hundreds of innocents over the years, let her see the monster!

"Bella. I am so glad you could make the trip. Too bad it won't be a very long one."

She was frightened. Just the way I wanted her to be. I could already taste her blood flowing down my scorched throat, satisfying every urge I had. I had to suck back in my venom. Why the hell hadn't Randall released me yet?

I felt determination and love surge through the human before me. Her heart was pounding and she stepped closer to me. I smirked at her. Soon enough.

"Jasper. Listen to me." She looked me straight in the eyes. Something about her look threw me off and made me uncomfortable. "You love me. And I love you more than anything I have ever loved in my entire life. I am yours. I am yours only. Please do not do this."

I had to give the human points for trying. "Bella, well, since you are mine, I know you would gladly give your life for me." Why was I still damn restrained?? I would have to have a talk with Randall when I was free to roam the premises again. He was making me suffer.

To my surprise, the feeble human nodded. "I would. But NOT this way. "

She got closer to me and rested her hands on my arms. My demon soared, but my heart clutched. I resisted. I need her blood. I need her.

Her voice was soft. "I would die for you Jasper. But if you kill me now, you will be miserable the rest of your life. Are you going to let Maria have control of you forever? You despise her."

"Maria…." I was trying to think. It was so damn hard with her in the room.

"You despise her." Her hands caressed my arms lovingly. I couldn't reach her. "Remember that story you told me about the mountains? Remember the mountains. Remember your humanity. You are a good person, Jasper. You fought for all those years to become the person you were meant to me. Your humanity dictates who you are, not your bloodlust."

She had tears in her eyes. I suddenly wanted to wipe away those tears. Why the hell would I want to do that? I began to struggle with the demon who roared viciously. I loved this woman. "Fight for me. Fight for us. Fight the bloodlust Jasper. You can do it. Emmett, Edward, Carlisle, Rosalie, and Esme are all here, waiting for me, waiting for you. They love you almost as much as I do. They will take you hunting as soon as we figure a way out of here or they figure a way in. They will make sure your hunger is satisfied. Fight it just a while longer. Please!"

My internal struggle was excruisiating. "I…. I can't."

She looked at me, and I was overwhelmed by the love she felt for me. "You can! You must! Everything you have overcome all these years! Think about how much you hated killing humans, think about how much you despised being here. This about how much you loved me. How much you loved Alice. That bitch told me that she killed Alice, Jasper. And she is trying to kill me. She is trying to take away everything in this existence that means anything to you. DO NOT LET HER!"

I was breathing heavily. My mind was racing a million miles a minute. I loved her. I love Bella. She is my world, my everything. If I kill her, my life will be over. I will not live in hopes I find a third love. Two is already extremely rare for a vampire.

I found myself chanting in my head. _Fight it. Fight it for her. Fight it for Alice. Fight it for my family. Fight it for the life I want. Fight it for my humanity. Just Fight it._

I then felt the release of Randall letting me be free to do as I please. Bella quickly moved away, her heart beating rapidly, awaiting the unknown.

I looked at her with my onyx eyes. I whispered, "We are getting out of here. Stay behind me. Do not get too close. I can't resist very long."

She just nodded silently and got as far away from me as possible. I held my breath and ripped open the door that had held me prisoner for too long. I lunged at the two guards, letting my years of military and vampire training take over instinctually. I ripped out the first's throat, while I reached out from behind and placed the other in a chokehold with my arm.

I became the deadly military weapon that Maria had wanted back, only I was not fighting for her team. I ripped apart the arms and limbs of the first and made quick work of the second. I could feel Bella's unease, but I had no time to process it if I was going to get the both of us out of there in one piece. I ran down one hallway and then another. To my surprise, Bella was keeping up fairly well. I heard several footsteps coming down the hall and Maria shouting orders to her underlings. I grabbed Bella, lifting her in my arms, flying up the stairs as quickly as I could.

I heard a crashing through the window and there stood the Cullen family in all their glory. They looked at me surprised. I literally threw Bella at them, with Rosalie catching her.

"Get her out of her now! I will kill her other wise! Now! Now!"

Rosalie understood the severity of my condition and flew back out the window as quickly as possible towards the woods. I only hoped it was enough. As it was, my demon cried out to go after them and drain her.

I turned away from the window, only to see five vampires in front of us. Three were newborns. The other was Maria and a Cajun vampire named Marcel who was particularly brutal from what Randall had told me. I looked at my family who was now crouched in various positions ready to fight. Maria's minions were the same.

Maria looked at me, all mirth gone from her eyes instead replaced with hatred. "What is wrong, Jasper?I gave you a gift, and this is how you repay me? I am bringing you home, where you belong, by my side and instead you save the pathetic human and enlist the help of your pathetic vampire family? I gave you your eternal life and I will take it away."

"Maria, I never wanted what you had to offer. I only stayed because I did not know there was a better way. You disgust me. I should have come back and killed you long ago."

I wondered where Randall was and when he was going to make his appearance. Within a second, everything went from quiet to utter chaos. Carlisle, Esme, and Edward lunged at the three newborns instantaneously. The newborns were stronger than the three of them, but completely unorganized which was a distinct advantage for my family. They had not been taught how to fight.

Emmett took on Marcel, Marcel matching Emmett blow for blow. Emmett seemed to almost be enjoying himself. If I did not know better I would think he was playing with the vampire.

As I went to grab Maria, three other Newborns barged through the door. I could not leave my family to handle seven vampires on their own. Regrettably, I had to watch Maria retreat into the recesses of the building as I focused my attention on the three eager vampires before me. I strategically moved them away from the others in the room and emitted a calmness that made the newborns pause. I took advantage of that moment, grabbing one newborn ripping it's arms and legs apart, throwing them out the window, into the surrounding forest. One incapacitated; with two to go. A tall gangly one leaped onto my back. I stumbled backwards for a moment as it attempted to twist my head off. The female choose to attack me straight on. I flipped the male over my head, using its body to pin down the female. Before either had time to react, I ripped off the head of one and then the head of the other, incapacitating them.

I looked to see how my family was doing. Edward and Carlisle had already finished off their newborns, with Carlisle joining Esme to kill hers. I looked at Edward with just one thought.

"Help Emmett." Emmett was having a difficult with Marcel, who had ripped off Emmett's arm in the process. I looked down the hall. "There are several more coming."

I needed to kill that bitch. I wanted to pay her back for Alice's death. Edward's eyes widened as he heard my thoughts. His eyes narrowed as he processed what I thought. "Go. Go kill her. We can manage up here. Now go!"

I ran down the hall, following Maria's scent. I knew this was a trap, but I could not help but pursue her. My demon was still roaring inside me and if it could not be satisfied with blood, it would make do with violence.

Maria smiled as I entered her training room, leaning up against a wall non chalantly, her arms crossed.

"So predictable, Mi Amor. I knew you couldn't help but go after me. It's a shame that after all I have done for you, all the _trouble_ I went through, I am now going to need to kill you. If you bow before me, I promise to make it quick."

"You dirty, fucking, whore."

Maria laughed. Her evil voice rang through the air. "Such language. Didn't I ever teach you manners?"

She yawned loudly, covering her mouth with her hand. "I am tired of this game. Randall, please come out now."

Randall walked out of the shadows. "Yes?"

"Please still Jasper. I am afraid I am going to need your services for a while. I plan on making this slow and painful."

Randall smiled and she returned his grin. He bowed his head to her. "No."

Maria looked at him harshly. "Not funny. Randall, still him now. This is not the time for games."

He looked at her mockingly and walked around her. "No. Maria, I think I have had just enough of your shit. You are going to listen to me."

Maria tried to move, her eyes growing wide as he used his ability on her. "Randall, stop that this instant! I made you. Listen to your fucking sire!"

"I'm sorry, but you are not my master anymore. I have followed you for fifteen years. Fifteen long fucking years and you have treated me like your pet. I am sick and tired of it. I am stronger than you, smarter than you, and I am going to get a better life than what you ever fucking offered. You are archaic. Jasper, although I may not agree with your vegetarian lifestyle, I am intrigued by what you have told me of the outside vampiric world. I thank you. Please, as a token of my gratitude, kill the bitch."

I smiled but my smile quickly turned to disdain. I had imagined a million ways of killing and torturing her over the past four weeks and now that the moment was finally here, I realized that she was not worth it. Torturing her would not bring back Alice; it would just make me as bad as Maria. I realized I did not care really how she died, I just wanted her dead. Without fanfare, I nodded at Randall and walked up to Maria.

"You killed my fucking wife. Then you tired to get me to kill my new mate. You deserve a death much worse than what I am going to give you, but I have family I love and care about, and the longer I focus on you, the more danger I put them in, so I will make this quick so I can help them."

Maria tried to plead, but Randall paralyzed her vocal chords. Mechanically, I ripped off her arms, her legs, and her head as Randall built a fire in the corner of the room. Together, we placed her in the pit and watched her burn to ashes.

Once that task was completed, Randall and I ran out through the hallways to the main entrance, where my family was tending their own fire. I saw Emmett walking around.

"Where the fuck is my arm? I swear to God Edward, if you accidently burned my arm…"

Edward rolled his eyes. "For the tenth time, Emmett, that vampire threw it out the window. Go outside and look for it! It's not in here."

"Are you all okay?"

Everyone paused, looking up at me. Edward asked the one question anyone cared about. "Did you kill her?"

I nodded.

He smiled. "Good."

They all looked wearily at Randall. "It's okay. He helped me kill Maria. How did you fare over here?"

Carlisle nodded. "It looks as if a large amount of the newborn army ran off. We got lucky."

Randall snorted. "That does not surprise me. Half of them were just turned over the past couple of weeks. They had no clue what the hell was even going on. There is going to be a slaughter in the next few towns."

Carlisle furrowed his brow. "I may have to make a call to the Volturi then."

Edward looked at him in surprise. "Aro?"

He nodded. "We can't have newborns running around unchecked."

I looked at Randall. "I have a feeling that Aro will find you fascinating. The Volturi seem like your cup of tea."

A few minutes passed with Carlisle filling in Randall on the Volturi as he made the call to Aro. I could feel my resolve slipping; I could still smell the human blood that had been spilt in this house over the past few weeks. Esme looked at me in worry. "We need to get you hunting. If you come within a mile of a human…"

I nodded. "I know. I am struggling very hard at this moment to even think straight."

Emmett grabbed my shoulder with his newfound arm. "I'll take you. It will help my arm heal quicker."

Esme agreed. "I will get back to Rosalie and Bella to let them know everything is all right. I have a feeling Carlisle will need Edward here to deal with the Volturi so they will be here for quite some time."

Emmett nodded. "When I am sure Jasper has eaten more than enough, I will take him back to Bella but not a moment before. Don't worry, I will keep him far away from any humans."

With that, Esme wrapped my in a large hug which Carlisle and Edward quickly joined as well. I could feel Randall's amusement and longing to be part of a family dynamic such as ours. I smiled at him gratefully to make him feel included.

"Thank you for helping me exact my revenge."

"Thank you for helping me gain my freedom."

We shook hands and I jumped through the window. Emmett led me through the trees. I was ready to hunt. The quicker I ate, the sooner I could see my beloved once and for all.


	42. Chapter 42

**A/N: This is it folks! The last chapter. The end. The grand finale. Songs were very instrumental in the making of this last chapter, so I wanted to tell you what I was playing when I wrote this chapter. For Bella's POV: True Colors by Cindi Lauper. For the first several paragraphs of Jasper's POV: For Someone by Jake Walden and after that, Book of Love by Peter Gabriel. It was very hard to end this story and I hope I did it justice. Listen to these songs if you get a chance.**

**Bella's POV**

The balcony of the hotel room the Cullen's had rented creaked as I leaned against the railing, straining my eyes for any sight of Jasper. My emotions were still raw as I tried to process what had occurred just a couple of hours before between Jasper and I. In truth, I was scared for the entire family. We still had not heard back from them yet and while I had a tremendous amount of faith in them, a small seed of doubt about our plan was beginning to appear. What if we had made the wrong decision? Correction, what if I had made the wrong decision? What if one of them got killed? What if Jasper got kill-… No, I wouldn't even let myself complete that line of thought.

I was so engrossed in my own musings that I nearly jumped out of my skin when Rosalie placed her hand on my shoulder.

Rosalie rolled her eyes when I had startled. "Bella for the love of God! Calm down. I just received a call from Esme who is on her way back right now. Everyone is fine. Emmett has taken Jasper for an extensive hunt. They will return when Jasper has had enough to be around you safely. Carlisle and Edward are wrapping up some things at Maria's."

I released a breath I was not aware I had been holding. "Everyone is okay?"

Rosalie smirked. "Well, except for Maria. Jasper killed her."

I dropped to my knees. It was over. Her reign of terror was done with. I let my tears flow softly down my cheeks as my relief took me over. Rosalie stood there awkwardly, somewhere in between a gesture of reassurance and mild annoyance at my response.

Esme walked through the door a few minutes later, reaching directly over to her two remaining daughters and embraced us tightly. We both melted into our adopted mother's touch as she filled us in on what had occurred after Rosalie had taken off with me.

Esme's story had provided me with a much needed distraction as I waited for Jasper's return. From her telling of it, the fight had not been pretty. It also did not surprise me to learn that Jasper made an ally while he was in captivity. He was resourceful and smart and others naturally gravitated to that. I was proud of him. Several hours later, I was recounting my brief time in captivity with Jasper, when both vampires paused. I looked at them curiously as they looked at me with a knowing glance and stepped out of the way.

There, at the edge of the room stood Jasper. Time just stopped as his eyes captured mine. Those orbs, that had held the darkest black possible only a day ago now shone with their normal golden hue. His hair was still in disarray, but somewhere along the hunt, Emmett must have convinced him to take a shower and change. He looked much more put together then when I saw him last. I honestly did not care if he had; all I cared about was seeing that he was okay and well.

I ran towards him, my arms flying up as he met me halfway. I did not bother me that Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett were actively staring at us. I wrapped my body securely around his, never wanting to let it go. Jasper hugged back, and I was overcome as the relief and love that he had doubled my own.

I pulled away slightly, my hands cupping his face, staring up into his eyes, marveling at how beautiful a creature he truly was. He leaned down and our lips met in a passionate embrace, both of us trying to tell the other how much we loved the other with that one kiss. After a minute we pulled away, giving each other small kisses, before ultimately my head rested comfortably on his chest.

"I missed you." He whispered.

"I was beginning to think I would never see you again."

"You will never lose me. Never. It was only a matter of time till I had gotten out of there on my own. Don't you know, Bella? I would fight from the depths of hell itself to see you again."

I smiled up at him. "I do now."

He kissed me again. I was completely lost in his touch and we did not pull away until Esme gently began to cough, bringing us back to reality.

Jasper looked up, looking slightly sheepish. "I'm sorry, Esme." He took a little step away from me then, his hand firmly placed in mine as looked at the rest of them.

Esme smiled. "We are just going to go and leave you two alone for now. I should meet up with Carlisle and Edward at the compound, and I am sure that Emmett and Rosalie have things to do. Jasper, if you wouldn't mind giving us a call later dear."

He nodded as I smiled at her, grateful for their hasty retreat. The door closed behind them softly. No sooner did we hear the gentle click, did Jasper reach out and pull my body forcefully to his. His fingers wrapped around mine squeezing till it almost hurt. It seemed like forever till his lips met mine. I kissed him back eagerly. I wanted his touch, I needed his touch. I grabbed onto his body wildly, eager to convince myself that he was really here. Jasper was just as keen as I was.

I was ready to pull him into the bedroom when I began to feel him pull away slightly, not only physically, but emotionally.

I cocked my head slightly. "What's wrong? Is everything alright Jasper?"

He leaned back against the wall, his head hitting with a light thud. "I was just thinking…"

"About what?"

"Bella, I almost killed you in that room."Jasper's voice was pained and he hung his head in shame. I stood there, knowing that there was more he wanted to say. "Before you arrived, I had resigned myself to the fact that I was going to let the monster win. I was going to give in."

His brow furrowed and he looked angry at himself. "I was going to revert back to the vampire I was before. I was willing to kill an innocent person, all to sate my hunger. What does that make me? It makes me no better than Maria or her lackeys."

I pursed my lips, trying to think of the right thing to say. Jasper, more so than the rest of the Cullens, always had a difficult time resolving his inner battle between his demon and his humanity. He always believed that because of his past, he was somehow less than them. What he did not see was the strength that it took for him to change his ways so radically.

My index finger tilted up his chin. "But you didn't. You were strong enough to resist for me. Even after four weeks of not having a single drop. You were amazing. I know how incredibly difficult that must have been. I don't even know if Carlisle could have had that restraint. Just because you struggled, does not make that feat any less impressive."

I looked into his eyes to bring home the point. "You are not a monster."

He hugged me then, his chin resting on the top of my head, and I rested against him, deeply inhaling Jasper's scent. We stayed in that position for a long time, neither of us moving, both of taking solace in the other. I had missed this more than anything else. I thought of the endless quiet hours we spent together just reading or relaxing as we held the others hand, or my back lying against his chest. In those moments, I knew without a doubt that he was the person I was meant to be with the rest of my existence, and that was what made it so special. It was that feeling of being completely and utterly loved by him.

And it could have all been gone.

If Emmett had never found Maria's trail, if Maria had decided to kill me instead of bring me to Jasper, if she had decided to kill Jasper. If. If. If.

It would have all been gone.

It wasn't until later I realized that it was now I sobbing into Jasper's chest. He pulled me into him tighter. "It will be alright. I'm safe. You are safe."

No matter how much I wanted to continue just sitting in his arms drinking him in, the tears would not stop flowing. "I'm… sorry. This month has just been so incredibly difficult. I love you so much. I just can't stop imagining everything you were put through." I used the back of my hand up to wipe my tears. "Ugh… this is so frustrating! I am sorry that I can't keep my emotions in check."

His words were barely a whisper. "Don't ever apologize for that. You emotions are one of the things I love most about you."

Jasper pulled away from me, motioning for us to sit down on the couch. I followed him to the green sofa in the sitting room. "Bella, I know that you've been through hell as well this past month. Emmett filled me in on what happened while I was away."

"What did he tell you?"

"He filled me in on everything. Your reaction, how you have been trying to make amends with Edward, but mostly he told me how strong you were." He rubbed my palm.

"I don't feel strong." I admitted.

Jasper looked at me incredulously. "You went into the lion's den at a severe disadvantage all to save me. If that is not strength, I don't know what is. But what I do know is that I love you more than I ever could possibly imagine."

My eyes glistened with tears again. "What would I have done if I had lost you?"

He smiled tenderly. "I am not going anywhere. I promise. I will be here till the end of time."

We paused. There was so much we needed to say to each other, so much we needed let the other know. But we could have sat here for hours talking without conveying how we truly felt. Without saying a word, Jasper took my hand, leading us to the door of the bedroom, both of us ready to show how much we loved the other.

***

**Jasper's POV**

There were times, when I was in Maria's captivity, that I thought about what it might be like if I never saw Bella again. The very idea terrified me. I had made a vow during my imprisonment that it would never occur. I had taken stalk of what was really important in my life. It was no surprise that I found that Bella was now the very top of that list.

It made me appreciate the struggle that Edward, and Jacob to a slightly lesser extent, had to go through all that much more. Bella had managed not only to capture my heart, but had captured theirs as well. Each of us loved her in a way that others would never comprehend; each of us understood what made Bella so special, so completely wonderful. If fate had twisted even in just the slightest, she could have easily had been standing up at the Alter with either of them. Bella had three hearts who would have willingly married her if destiny had meant for it to be so.

It was the reason that I asked Edward and Jacob only to stand by my side as we married. It seemed fitting for them to be up there, her first and second love each giving their consent of our marriage, acknowledging our love. At first I was not sure if Edward would even want to go to the wedding, much less accept to be in the wedding party. But when I explained to him how important it was and the reason I wanted him to be the best man, he agreed, his emotions mixed, but I could feel that he still felt honored to be asked. I was beginning to have hope that Edward may someday be happy again.

So now, here I stand, up by a white arch in the backyard of the Cullen Fork's home, in a tux with the two other men who would always hold a place in Bella's heart.

My thoughts turned away from past lovers and fell solely on the person who was now my reason for being on this earth.

A quiet cover of a song called The Book of Love began to play. The small group of family and friends we had invited to witness the wedding stood as they awaited the Bride walking down the aisle with her father.

Bella turned the corner and began to walk under the white canopy we had to shield us from the sun that was threatening to peak out. My breath caught. She really was a vision in white. Her dress was sophisticated but still simple. Her hair was pulled up in ringlets, with a sapphire barrette holding it in place. I smiled, instantly recognizing it as a gift from Alice. It was also purely Bella.

She had chosen her bouquet to be almost an exact replica of the flowers I first bought her when she moved into her apartment. The magnolia's were fragrant and my mind thought of the first time I saw her in her apartment. I would have never imagined that day that less than a year later, Bella would be walking down an aisle ready to marry me, of all people. She looked down at first as she walked, clearly uncomfortable being the center of attention. My bride then looked up.

I could have sworn in that moment, my heart beat just one lone single heartbeat. She really was mine and no one else's. My eyes never left hers as she glided down the aisle. As her father placed her hands into mine, he turned to me, his voice cracking slightly.

"Love her the way she deserves to be loved, son."

"I will, sir."

He nodded and walked to his seat, sitting down next to Bella's mother, Renee.

I gave her hand a quick squeeze then, the world quickly melting away around us. This was now just Bella and I. This was the beginning of forever. When I had asked her to marry me all those months ago, I never pictured a moment as perfect as this. She mouthed the words- "I love you."

To which I returned, "I don't deserve you."

She then responded with, "Yes, you do. You always have."

We waited for the song to end, before we both turned to Carlisle, who had agreed to officiate the wedding.

Carlisle smiled reassuringly at the both of us. "Today we are gathered to join in the hands of marriage Isabella Marie Swan and Jasper Whitlock. Two souls that were meant to find one another despite any obstacles that may have come their way."

Carlisle began to talk to the guests about the power of Love, but I do not think that Bella or I truly heard a word of it. It was until Carlisle uttered the words- "Bella and Jasper have written their own vows that they wish to share with you all at this time. Bella, if you would."

Bella acknowledged Carlisle briefly before turning back to me, her eyes shining with love.

"Jasper, from the very first time I met you all those years ago, I knew you were special. Your ability to make people at ease when they are around you is remarkable. But it took a second meeting years later, to realize how special you were to me. You are an incredible man. You have not only become my very best friend, but you have shown me how to love again, and how to open myself up to love again. You believe in me, and in turn I believe more in myself. I promise to love you for eternity, respecting you, honoring you, being faithful to you, and sharing my everything with you and only you."

She was amazing. Carlisle nodded to me indicating it was my turn. I turned back to my love.

"Bella, you have always been able to see beyond what lay before you. From the first time I met you, I knew you were special. You were so unselfish and your capacity for understanding and love was beyond anything I have ever known. When I saw you years later from the last time I saw you, although you were changed, more confident, more graceful, if possible even more beautiful, that capacity you had to love never waned. I found what started off as friendship had blossomed into something so much more than I could have ever hoped for. You are my partner now in this existence, for better or for worse. I will spend the rest of my eternity respecting you, honoring you, being faithful to you, and sharing my everything with you and only you."

Carlisle then handed Bella the wedding ring we had chosen for me. Bella's hand shook slightly as she took my hand in hers. "With this ring, I thee wed."

She slid the ring on easily and Carlisle handed me a ring, while much smaller, was identical to mine. I grinned as I slid the ring on her finger and repeated the words, "With this ring, I thee wed."

With those rings now on our fingers, we were bound, as friends, as lovers, as husband and wife. If it was even possible, I loved her more. My hands clasped in hers and we turned to Carlisle.

He smiled broadly. "It is my pleasure, and my honor, to pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Whitlock. You may now kiss the bride."

I swept Bella up in my arms, kissing the woman that fate had destined me to be with.

****

It was months after our wedding. Life had settled into a comfortable pattern. After our honeymoon, we had spent most of the time in Forks, visiting with Bella's family, which consisted of Charlie, Jacob, and Audrey. Life was comfortable there. Charlie and I found that we got along very well, and Charlie was thrilled at the opportunity to spend time with his daughter.

Jacob and Audrey spent a large amount of time with us as well, causing some strife within his werewolf community. Jacob ended up separating from his main pack, with his friend Seth and his sister Leah joining him. Despite the drama on the reservation, the two of them were happy. Audrey was already pregnant with their first child, a girl they were naming after Bella who was due to be born in early January.

When we had not been in Forks, we had taken weekend trips up to British Columbia to see our family. Life continued as before there, Carlisle enjoying his practice, while Esme continued to expand her design firm. Rosalie and Emmett had taken off on an extended vacation, to Australia this time around. They were planning on returning in the next few weeks and Emmett had advised us that we better be coming back around upon their return.

Edward had enrolled in the local high school as a junior, beginning the hell of secondary education yet again to be close to the family. Esme was thrilled of course; the school was smaller, but the girls enthusiastic towards Edward as usual which he detested. The tentative friendship that Bella and Edward had begun during the situation with Maria became stronger. Every once in a while I would feel longing coming from Edward while looking at her, but he understood the reality of the situation and really did keep his emotions under lock and key for the most part. He seemed more comfortable then a few months ago.

We had finally decided to return to Maine, where the fall foliage was in full effect. As much as it was great to be around our loved ones, we both agreed that it was nice to be home. Maine was where we had become so close and it felt right to be here. We had just returned from a bike ride through the mountains, taking the Ducati out for a much needed spin and enjoying just being in only each others company again, after months of friends and family surrounding us.

It was a warm autumn day. Bella and I were sitting on the porch swing, enjoying the sun as its last rays filtered through the trees, making the orange and red leaves brilliantly bright.

Bella snuggled into my chest. It was these quiet moments I enjoyed more than anything with her. I breathed in the scent of her hair, enjoying the warmth of her small body against me. I sighed in contentment, kissing the top of her head.

"What a perfect day." She sighed.

"It really was."

Bella squeezed my body. We sat there quietly for a few minutes when she spoke again. "Jasper?"

"Yes?"

"I'm ready."

I froze slightly. She did not need to be more specific. I knew what she was referring to. "Are you sure?"

I felt her nod against my chest. "I've said my goodbyes."

I pulled her away from my body, looking into those chocolate brown eyes. "I loved you before and I will love you after."

Her heart beat steadily. She really was ready. There was no hesitation at all. "For eternity."

I kissed her warm lips one last time before moving down to her jugular, listening to the blood that flowed directly beneath before swiftly biting down. This was not a goodbye, but a hello.

We were now united; forever.

**Ending Author's Note:**

Wow. That is it folks. THE END. I really hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this story. Now, I have a favor to ask all of you. I don't really ask for reviews often, but I am here. I have over six hundred people that marked this story as a favorite, and over eight hundred people on Alert. If you have read my story and enjoyed it (or even if not), _**please**_ take the time and answer the following question, even if it is just one line:

**Why did you keep reading this story? What kept you interested?**

I have a lot of people I want to thank and I know I am going to leave people out and that is not my intention at all so I am just going to mention a couple, but know that you all rock and your comments are so sweet and rewarding to me.

First Off, NavyGirl14 was the first person to favorite this story and has reviewed almost every chapter since. She has stuck with me from day one. Seriously, the fact that you saw potential in my story right from the get go meant a lot to me!

MissMaj, Bamababe, trampvamp, sparagus, and Clurabella: Thank you for your reviews and your awesome stories. When I couldn't write anything, your stories have provided much needed entertainment as I am sure they will in the future.

Some of you wrote extremely touching reviews and you do not know how on some days, that gave me the encouragement to continue with my novel even though there are days when I think my writing is complete and utter rubbish.

Maybe some day I will get motivation to write a sequel to this story or will write another long story like this one with Jasper and Bella… but for now, I am going focus on my novel (that and maybe some small revisions to this story down the road). Thank you all so much for sticking with me and reading this story… the fan-fiction community rocks and I am glad I found it!

Thanks Again!

Jenn


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